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Clips from 30 Rock - Jackie Jormp-Jomp (S03E03)

"Is there anything I can do to speed this process up so I can get back to work?"
30 Rock
"I'm afraid not."
30 Rock
"- Jenna, I need to speak with you. - Jack, I did not hit that Asian page."
30 Rock
"I was just swinging my arm and she walked into me. Twice."
30 Rock
"It's about your Sheinhardt-Universal Japlin Joplin biopic."
30 Rock
"I didn't say there was any. Universal did some focus testing this week."
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"Yes. I was afraid of this."
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"It turns out not having the life rights or any Japlin Joplin songs"
30 Rock
"But she knows what she did."
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"Kenneth, stop. I just want a script"
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"Put that down."
30 Rock
"Lemon, you know you're supposed to go home after your pervert seminars."
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"- You sure you miss this? - Yes."
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"- jabbering at doormen. - Hey, I brighten their day."
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"- "Constant craving." - He could do better."
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"Has anyone looked at this sexual harassment stuff they gave us?"
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"- Is that true? - It's the first thing listed."
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"- Have you read this? - Well, I wanted to, because"
30 Rock
"Ms. Vieira..."
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"I'm sure your job can be annoying. Not all the tenants are as fun as me."
30 Rock
"We have a saying that laughter is the best medicine,"
30 Rock
"so I'm kind of like a doctor here."
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"I'm Emily. Are you new to the building?"
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"I was an investment banker for 15 years."
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"secret candy drawer..."
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"there are much better ways to be happy."
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"I recently learned that company policy requires that employees"
30 Rock
"I am not your immediate supervisor. There are perhaps..."
30 Rock
"Thank you, sir."
30 Rock
"Do you know who our immediate supervisor is?"
30 Rock
"I will not be able to attend your wedding."
30 Rock
"and pop-tarts? Not too shabs."
30 Rock
"Or write a cookbook specifically for mixed-race children."
30 Rock
"I don't think I'd be good company."
30 Rock
"I'm not really in spa/shopping mode."
30 Rock
"It's just so stressful thinking at my employees trying"
30 Rock
"- to do everything without me. - Those look great on you."
30 Rock
"today's just not the day. So, you know..."
30 Rock
"I'll hang out with you guys for a little bit,"
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"- What time is it? - Almost midnight."
30 Rock
"- I'm prepared to do a nipple slip. - Just talk about the movie."
30 Rock
"First a backpack upstages me,"
30 Rock
"and now the cyrus family has decided to rock a bunch of funky hats."
30 Rock
"You can't give up now. Did Jackie Jormp-Jomp give up"
30 Rock
"You got me."
30 Rock
"Did they just say I'm dead? I thought you spoke to the producers."
30 Rock
"Connor, if we don't get some traction, Jenna Maroney's picture's dead."
30 Rock
"- I wanna Tupac you. - Fine. But I have to pee first."
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"- while I sell the movie. - I can play dead."
30 Rock
"Your suspension is up, and here..."
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"I guess so."
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"Work means stress."
30 Rock
"with 100 different problems and responsibilities."
30 Rock
"and the time that you will never get back"
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"Just one."
30 Rock
"What the happened? Jeffrey Weener-Slave said you put your fingers in his mouth."
30 Rock
"Good god, what Indigo Girls song is that from?"
30 Rock
"And they spin every morning,"
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"Listen, you are wrong about Emily."
30 Rock
"are refusing to come to work out of solidarity with Daphne."
30 Rock
"Usually, this is the point in my process"
30 Rock
"Pete. A word."
30 Rock
"Jenna's dead."
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"We put it together after she cheated on that mobster."
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"Is anybody else BM-ing like a rock star?"
30 Rock
"No we don't. He's not even gonna notice they're gone."
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"Boy, I am really starting to feel the benefits of massages"
30 Rock
"Check this out."
30 Rock
"That's why we do our special activity."
30 Rock
"and then I am coming at you like an animal."
30 Rock
"God, is this a fight club?"
30 Rock
"I have to get back to my show."
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"You're gonna have to fight your way out."
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"The coast guard won't declare her dead yet, what the pirates did to that boat!"
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"- What the hell are you doing here? - They're talking about me."
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"A couple of gay guys were crying."
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"This is just the greatest night of my..."
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"Give me a microphone."
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"Still alive. Not yet 32. Sorry, Jack. Worth it."
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"This is a disaster."
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"Why are you smiling?"
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"I'm back, nerds!"
30 Rock
"You're all here because you've been suspended from work"
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"for sexual harassment."
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"Excuse me, Mr. Winerslav..."
30 Rock
"It's pronounced "weener-slave"."
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"OK, Jeffrey."
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"That's somethin' you don't see every day."
30 Rock
"of a very appropriate"
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"Wait. We can call her Japlin Joplin?"
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"We got the life rights? It's not Janie Jimplin anymore?"
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"It looks like your character's going to be called Jackie Jormp-Jomp."
30 Rock
"OK. So, what's the good news?"
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"was a negative for audiences."
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"What about my duet with Jimi Hendrickson at Woodstocks?"
30 Rock
"Jenna, Sheinhardt-Universal does not wanna release the picture."
30 Rock
"- How will that affect my Oscar chances? - Adversely."
30 Rock
""Sing Dem Blues, White Girl: The Jackie Jormp-Jomp Story""
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"has gotta get some buzz. I'm gonna need your help for that."
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"Do you need a sex tape released? 'Cause I got a weird one."
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"No, Jenna, I want you on the PR Warpath."
30 Rock
"If there's a red carpet, I want you on it talking up the movie starting Monday."
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"I'll set aside my feud with Raven Simone for one day."
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"You aren't supposed to be here."
30 Rock
"You're on s-e-x probation."
30 Rock
"I know, I just wanted to stop by and check in."
30 Rock
"or a rundown, OK?"
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"You give that to me."
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"Did you hear what I said?"
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"As crazy and stressful as this place is, not being here is worse."
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"I feel for you. Remember when I came back from the Economic Forum with Mono"
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"and missed work I wanted to pull my hair out, I couldn't because it's too thick?"
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"We need the stress. We're only happy when we're overcoming obstacles."
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"You take that away, we start bouncing off the walls, spend our days"
30 Rock
"Before I go, can I at least find out what Frank's hat says?"
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"I don't need to read it. The whole thing is loosely based"
30 Rock
"on a evening I spent with Isiah Thomas."
30 Rock
"No wonder Liz got busted. According to this,"
30 Rock
"you can't do anything without it being considered harassment."
30 Rock
"Did you know you have to report in-office relationships?"
30 Rock
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