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Clips from The Office - Prince Family Paper (S05E05)

"I'll fax over some of the things we're looking for, okay?"
The Office
"Oh! Well, then e-mail it, David."
The Office
"Some actress, whether she's hot."
The Office
"Ah! Hilary Swank."
The Office
"Not at all."
The Office
"She's got mean eyes."
The Office
"She looks like a monster."
The Office
"Guys, she is a beautiful movie star,"
The Office
"so maybe we should just go to work."
The Office
"She is an amazing actress."
The Office
"That's not the question. She's not hot."
The Office
"Yeah. Thank you, Phyllis. JIM: Okay, okay, okay."
The Office
"Why don't we just put this to a vote,"
The Office
"Okay, and who thinks that Hilary Swank is not hot? Raise your hand."
The Office
"What if the owner of Prince Family Paper has a beautiful daughter,"
The Office
"I will seduce her."
The Office
"No, I want to seduce her. I'll seduce her."
The Office
"Let me seduce her. Michael, please. No, no, no. I got it."
The Office
"You'll fall in love with her."
The Office
"Yeah? So what if I did?"
The Office
"That would take precedence, and I would expect your support."
The Office
"Okay, so let's go over the plan again."
The Office
"All right. I am a local business owner. Mmm-hmm."
The Office
"I need to buy paper. Yep."
The Office
"I find out everything about their prices and policies."
The Office
"Your fictitious name? Michael Scarn."
The Office
"Good. I am a paper salesman looking for a new job."
The Office
"I find out everything about their expenses and salaries."
The Office
"and we compare notes. No. No. I never said Denny's. IHOP."
The Office
"No. I said Denny's. IHOP. We're going to IHOP."
The Office
"You know how I feel about IHOP. Don't start."
The Office
"I don't want to get into this debate again. Okay."
The Office
"I enjoy IHOP."
The Office
"I'll have a cup of coffee."
The Office
"The store next to them is for lease."
The Office
"So what?"
The Office
"It means they're not expanding."
The Office
"Maybe they're shrinking. No."
The Office
"DWIGHT: It's lunch-time, but no sign of anyone coming in or out,"
The Office
"which means they're not taking new customers out to lunch,"
The Office
"which means they're not acquiring new business,"
The Office
"Yeah. There are clouds, clouds in the sky."
The Office
"Means it's going to rain. Bad for business."
The Office
"It would if they were altocumulus and not cirrostratus."
The Office
"Why do... Okay."
The Office
"Michael. Whatever."
The Office
"Get your clouds right. Shut up."
The Office
"I'm gonna go in, in exactly 10 minutes."
The Office
"Right. Also, we're going to need a signal"
The Office
"to bolt out of there, in case there is danger. Fine."
The Office
"And that signal is lick your lips. Try it."
The Office
"Good."
The Office
"All right, here come the sharks."
The Office
"(BOTH SINGING JAWS THEME)"
The Office
"MICHAEL: In nature, there is something called the food chain."
The Office
"and the little shark eats the littler shark,"
The Office
"and so on and so on and so on,"
The Office
"So, now replace sharks with paper companies,"
The Office
"and that is all you need to know about business."
The Office
"Hi. How can I help you?"
The Office
"My name is Michael Scarn."
The Office
"I am a local business owner,"
The Office
"and I would like to find out about your company."
The Office
"Please come in. Thank you."
The Office
"What kind of business are you in?"
The Office
"I assume your primary paper needs are stationery, general office."
The Office
"Where I used to live, our paper supplier had a lot of big clients,"
The Office
"and I just didn't feel like a priority."
The Office
"So I guess my question to you would be,"
The Office
"Really? That many?"
The Office
"This doesn't seem like a very big operation."
The Office
"Well, it's just me, my wife and my son."
The Office
"I opened this place after I came back from Vietnam."
The Office
"Mmm."
The Office
"ANDY: Each side will have three minutes to prepare opening arguments."
The Office
"Topic. Hilary Swank is attractive."
The Office
"The debate is whether she's hot."
The Office
"What difference does it make?"
The Office
"Huge difference. A painting can be beautiful,"
The Office
"but I don't want to bang a painting."
The Office
"So, even specialty paper, say 94 brightness, double-bonded,"
The Office
"You sure know a lot about paper for a lawyer."
The Office
"Oh! Well, that is because I am a genius."
The Office
"(CHUCKLING) Oh, really? Yes."
The Office
"Like, watch this. Is this the cup?"
The Office
"Is this the cup? Is this what I drink out of?"
The Office
"(LAUGHING)"
The Office
"Laughter is my job."
The Office
"Tears are my game. Law is my profession."
The Office
"Well... DWIGHT: Hello."
The Office
"Hi."
The Office
"I'm afraid we're not hiring right now."
The Office
"ROGER: (LAUGHS) That's my son."
The Office
"I'm your son now. You can visit him on holidays."
The Office
"Dwight Schrute."
The Office
"I'm the top salesman there, and I'm looking for a new challenge."
The Office
"(LAUGHS) Eighty, that's nothing."
The Office
"I've got 90 clients myself."
The Office
"Well, I sure hope not."
The Office
"I think all of us have a tendency to view celebrities as sort of mythical figures."
The Office
"It's a gut thing."
The Office
"That's fair. You know what, Kev? Do me a favor."
The Office
"Now, imagine that Hilary Swank comes into this office for real."
The Office
"She walks over to you and she says,"
The Office
""Kevin Malone, I just read your online profile,"
The Office
""and there's nothing I'd rather do than make out with you right now.""
The Office
"Now, you tell me something, is she hot?"
The Office
"Hey, Kev, what are you doing?"
The Office
"Nope. It's, "Is she hot?" Not, "Would you do her?""
The Office
"Respect the game."
The Office
"Oh, my God. Yeah."
The Office
"This close."
The Office
"So why are you considering leaving Dunder Mifflin?"
The Office
"My boss. (LAUGHING) Oh, yeah? Do tell."
The Office
"His insensitivity could border on the cruel."
The Office
"This is a man who does not listen to the needs of his underlings."
The Office
"Hey! He's way..."
The Office
"Hey, how's the interview going?"
The Office
"It's going very well. Don't blow it."
The Office
"You want a picture of me? I would."
The Office
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