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Clips from Family Guy - Trading Places (S09E09)

"Mr. Pewterschmidt? What are you doin' here?"
Family Guy
"You want a used dirt bike?"
Family Guy
"Oh, not at all. But Lois told me how much you wanted it."
Family Guy
"So I decided to win it for myself"
Family Guy
"just so I could destroy it in front of you."
Family Guy
"And the clock starts..."
Family Guy
"How are you gonna destroy a dirt bike?"
Family Guy
"You can't even open your own aspirin."
Family Guy
"With that."
Family Guy
"Aw, damn it!"
Family Guy
"Ooh! Our first hand off the dirt bike!"
Family Guy
"Huh. I guess you're out, Mr. Pewterschmidt."
Family Guy
"Well, I already paid for that thing."
Family Guy
"So I'm just gonna stick around"
Family Guy
"and smash other stuff you like."
Family Guy
"Hey, fatass, you like, um..."
Family Guy
"you like, uh..."
Family Guy
"Ha-ha! You loved that thing."
Family Guy
"♪ ♪"
Family Guy
"Amazing!"
Family Guy
"Nine hours with no break!"
Family Guy
"You might as well give up now, Mr. Mayor."
Family Guy
"This dirt bike is mine."
Family Guy
"Like heck, it is!"
Family Guy
"Hey, check your phone."
Family Guy
"Why?"
Family Guy
"I just sent you a picture of a kitten in sunglasses."
Family Guy
"Well, this I gotta see!"
Family Guy
"And we have a winner!"
Family Guy
"Aw, darn it."
Family Guy
"Help! I'm lost in corn!"
Family Guy
"Hey, where's Peter?"
Family Guy
"I don't know. I haven't heard from him since he left work."
Family Guy
"Hope you made extra. I brought a guest."
Family Guy
"This is my dirt bike girlfriend."
Family Guy
"I'm a dirt bike guy now,"
Family Guy
"so I need a dirt bike girlfriend."
Family Guy
"Yes, she has small breasts,"
Family Guy
"Peter, she has to leave."
Family Guy
"No, Lois! I will not allow you to look down on Amber"
Family Guy
"just 'cause she goes to an alternative high school!"
Family Guy
"There's different ways to measure intelligence"
Family Guy
"besides someone's grade-point average!"
Family Guy
"Fact is, she rumpled up some poetry she wrote"
Family Guy
"and threw it away in a fit,"
Family Guy
"Fine. Amber, would you like to have"
Family Guy
"some dinner with our family?"
Family Guy
"Nah, I can't."
Family Guy
"I got a wicked bruise on the back of my throat."
Family Guy
"Ladies and gentlemen, please rise for our national anthem,"
Family Guy
"performed this afternoon by Peter Griffin and his dirt bike."
Family Guy
"What do you say we take it for a spin?"
Family Guy
"You shouldn't be sitting on that."
Family Guy
"Come on."
Family Guy
"Come on, Meg, just get on!"
Family Guy
"Hey, Meg, check it out."
Family Guy
"I'm gonna jump that fire hydrant."
Family Guy
"Chris, don't! You're gonna wreck Dad's bike!"
Family Guy
"Too late, I already narrowed my eyes."
Family Guy
"You mean look what two black teenagers did"
Family Guy
"when they stole Dad's bike."
Family Guy
"You could have been killed!"
Family Guy
"Is that right?"
Family Guy
"So you like taking dirt bikes"
Family Guy
"that don't belong to you, huh?"
Family Guy
"W-what?!"
Family Guy
"See how you like 'em!"
Family Guy
"Here, I'll even get you started."
Family Guy
"Dad, I don't smoke."
Family Guy
"Sure, you don't now. But keep at it."
Family Guy
"You'll get the hang of it."
Family Guy
"By the end of that pack,"
Family Guy
"you'll be smoking like a real pro. Like a cool kid."
Family Guy
"There, that's it."
Family Guy
"Gettin' smoother, isn't it?"
Family Guy
"Yeah. Oh, yeah!"
Family Guy
"Wait till you try it after a meal. Delicious!"
Family Guy
"And after sex? Forget about it."
Family Guy
"It's like puttin' your penis to sleep in a feather bed."
Family Guy
"I think I may want more cigarettes."
Family Guy
"But I'm pretty mad about my dirt bike!"
Family Guy
"Kids, I'm sorry to say this,"
Family Guy
"Look, it was an accident, okay?"
Family Guy
"I mean, you can always buy another one, right?"
Family Guy
"Buy another one?!"
Family Guy
"You know, I don't think you kids appreciate"
Family Guy
"how hard your father and I work"
Family Guy
"to provide you with everything we do."
Family Guy
"No, it's not."
Family Guy
"And you get to make all the rules."
Family Guy
"Damn right I do, 'cause I make the money!"
Family Guy
"I'm the big... mamoo around here!"
Family Guy
"Now, w-w-when you start bringin' in a paycheck"
Family Guy
"Oh, you think so, huh?"
Family Guy
"Well, maybe you'd like to try it for a little while."
Family Guy
"You be the adults!"
Family Guy
"What do you mean?"
Family Guy
"You kids switch places with your dad and me."
Family Guy
"For the next week, you'll be the parents and we'll be the kids."
Family Guy
"Seriously? Yeah, that'd be awesome!"
Family Guy
"That sounds great!"
Family Guy
"That's a great idea, Lois. Crisscross!"
Family Guy
"Yes!"
Family Guy
"So we got a deal?"
Family Guy
"Yeah, we got a deal."
Family Guy
"Face-off!"
Family Guy
"Road House."
Family Guy
"Here's your breakfast, Lois."
Family Guy
"Thank you, Mom."
Family Guy
"Wh-wh-what is, what is this?"
Family Guy
"What's goin' on?"
Family Guy
"Oh, apparently, Chris and Meg are switching places"
Family Guy
"with Peter and Lois for the week."
Family Guy
"Myah!"
Family Guy
"Hey, Mom, do you mind if I go shoppin'"
Family Guy
"with Jennifer after school?"
Family Guy
"No, Peter, no, no, you're still you."
Family Guy
"Y-you're just a teenager."
Family Guy
"You're not switching genders."
Family Guy
"Ah. I shall return."
Family Guy
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