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Clips from Moonlighting - Plastic Fantastic Lovers (S05E05)

TV Movies 1985 Season 5, Episode 4 733 clips
Crime
...but do I want one?
"...but do I want one?"
Moonlighting
From what I can gather, his boss wants to retain our services.
"From what I can gather, his boss wants to retain our services."
Moonlighting
Wow, video clients, a new frontier.
"Wow, video clients, a new frontier."
Moonlighting
Agnes, see if Kooky here wants cream and sugar in his formaldehyde.
"Agnes, see if Kooky here wants cream and sugar in his formaldehyde."
Moonlighting
Bazooka Joe.
"Bazooka Joe."
Moonlighting
...more appealing to my wife.
"...more appealing to my wife."
Moonlighting
What, you one of them shushers?
"What, you one of them shushers?"
Moonlighting
Take garters and stockings, do women enjoy wearing them?
"Take garters and stockings, do women enjoy wearing them?"
Moonlighting
I have yet to meet a man who doesn't drool at the thought of them.
"I have yet to meet a man who doesn't drool at the thought of them."
Moonlighting
Unfortunately, Father Time plays favorites.
"Unfortunately, Father Time plays favorites."
Moonlighting
Didn't get into Yale.
"Didn't get into Yale."
Moonlighting
What are you afraid of exactly?
"What are you afraid of exactly?"
Moonlighting
Let's have a look.
"Let's have a look."
Moonlighting
And all the time he's waiting, he was looking at me.
"And all the time he's waiting, he was looking at me."
Moonlighting
You were involved with Dave-a-roony for a minute.
"You were involved with Dave-a-roony for a minute."
Moonlighting
You have no idea what it does for my self-esteem.
"You have no idea what it does for my self-esteem."
Moonlighting
I'll go and tell Hunziger his case looks promising.
"I'll go and tell Hunziger his case looks promising."
Moonlighting
Wait a minute, what's the rush? The room is paid for.
"Wait a minute, what's the rush? The room is paid for."
Moonlighting
Somebody else has gotta clean the sheets.
"Somebody else has gotta clean the sheets."
Moonlighting
Right.
"Right."
Moonlighting
Oh, you're far too polite to say so, of course...
"Oh, you're far too polite to say so, of course..."
Moonlighting
Did he say mutant?
"Did he say mutant?"
Moonlighting
Oh, excuse me, I didn't realise you had company.
"Oh, excuse me, I didn't realise you had company."
Moonlighting
But if you believe that I've been wronged by this man...
"But if you believe that I've been wronged by this man..."
Moonlighting
I didn't know they made legs like that anymore.
"I didn't know they made legs like that anymore."
Moonlighting
...I'd ever seen in my real life.
"...I'd ever seen in my real life."
Moonlighting
If I wasn't a finalist in a pageant, you wouldn't give me the time of day.
"If I wasn't a finalist in a pageant, you wouldn't give me the time of day."
Moonlighting
I mean, I like to think...
"I mean, I like to think..."
Moonlighting
-Maddie. -What?
"-Maddie. -What?"
Moonlighting
Since I'm going to be spending the rest of my life in prison...
"Since I'm going to be spending the rest of my life in prison..."
Moonlighting
...I'll put these scalpels to good use.
"...I'll put these scalpels to good use."
Moonlighting
Damn.
"Damn."
Moonlighting
I'm sorry.
"I'm sorry."
Moonlighting
All right, Bazooka Joe, put down the land shark.
"All right, Bazooka Joe, put down the land shark."
Moonlighting
Great move, Goldilocks.
"Great move, Goldilocks."
Moonlighting
But, Mr. Hunziger--
"But, Mr. Hunziger--"
Moonlighting
Diet and exercise.
"Diet and exercise."
Moonlighting
Oh, my God.
"Oh, my God."
Moonlighting
-Miss Hayes. -What?
"-Miss Hayes. -What?"
Moonlighting
-Never mind. -Agnes.
"-Never mind. -Agnes."
Moonlighting
-Yes, Miss Hayes. -What is it?
"-Yes, Miss Hayes. -What is it?"
Moonlighting
Nothing, I wondered if you had a moment, but you don't, that's fine.
"Nothing, I wondered if you had a moment, but you don't, that's fine."
Moonlighting
I do. I'm sorry. Please come in.
"I do. I'm sorry. Please come in."
Moonlighting
I didn't mean to snap at you.
"I didn't mean to snap at you."
Moonlighting
-Do you know anything about phones? -I know everything about phones.
"-Do you know anything about phones? -I know everything about phones."
Moonlighting
I can't make head or tail of this cellular that David bought.
"I can't make head or tail of this cellular that David bought."
Moonlighting
I don't know anything about those phones.
"I don't know anything about those phones."
Moonlighting
Nowadays, you have to have a degree in computers to set your clock back.
"Nowadays, you have to have a degree in computers to set your clock back."
Moonlighting
To turn your alarm on, to make a phone call.
"To turn your alarm on, to make a phone call."
Moonlighting
-I know. -And do you know why?
"-I know. -And do you know why?"
Moonlighting
-l don't know. -Men.
"-l don't know. -Men."
Moonlighting
Men?
"Men?"
Moonlighting
They're all little boys on one big search for the ultimate toy.
"They're all little boys on one big search for the ultimate toy."
Moonlighting
I know.
"I know."
Moonlighting
-You know the worst part of it is? -I don't know.
"-You know the worst part of it is? -I don't know."
Moonlighting
We have to share the same toy box.
"We have to share the same toy box."
Moonlighting
I know.
"I know."
Moonlighting
David decides to have this cellular phone for stakeouts...
"David decides to have this cellular phone for stakeouts..."
Moonlighting
-l don't know. -No. Do I know how to use one?
"-l don't know. -No. Do I know how to use one?"
Moonlighting
-I don't know. -No. Can I figure it out?
"-I don't know. -No. Can I figure it out?"
Moonlighting
No.
"No."
Moonlighting
Of course I can figure it out.
"Of course I can figure it out."
Moonlighting
-But do I have the time or interest? -No?
"-But do I have the time or interest? -No?"
Moonlighting
Right. And whose problem is that?
"Right. And whose problem is that?"
Moonlighting
-Is that his problem? -No.
"-Is that his problem? -No."
Moonlighting
Mine! I have to learn how to use this because he has to have his toys.
"Mine! I have to learn how to use this because he has to have his toys."
Moonlighting
-Because they're all the same. -Who?
"-Because they're all the same. -Who?"
Moonlighting
Men. What was it you wanted to talk to me about?
"Men. What was it you wanted to talk to me about?"
Moonlighting
-Men. -You too?
"-Men. -You too?"
Moonlighting
Agnes...
"Agnes..."
Moonlighting
...is that a rash?
"...is that a rash?"
Moonlighting
No, but I wish it were.
"No, but I wish it were."
Moonlighting
A rash is an act of nature, like hives.
"A rash is an act of nature, like hives."
Moonlighting
But this? This is an act of Burt.
"But this? This is an act of Burt."
Moonlighting
-It is. -Stubble burn.
"-It is. -Stubble burn."
Moonlighting
Oh, Miss Hayes, I'm so happy to hear you say that.
"Oh, Miss Hayes, I'm so happy to hear you say that."
Moonlighting
You know how this feels? It's happened to you?
"You know how this feels? It's happened to you?"
Moonlighting
All the time. Well, not all the time, but I know how you feel.
"All the time. Well, not all the time, but I know how you feel."
Moonlighting
You don't know what that means to me, knowing that I can come to you.
"You don't know what that means to me, knowing that I can come to you."
Moonlighting
Miss Hayes, can we speak frankly?
"Miss Hayes, can we speak frankly?"
Moonlighting
Of course, Agnes.
"Of course, Agnes."
Moonlighting
Because you're my boss, I tend to think of you as my boss.
"Because you're my boss, I tend to think of you as my boss."
Moonlighting
But at a time like this, it makes me feel really good...
"But at a time like this, it makes me feel really good..."
Moonlighting
...to also know that I can think of you as a sister.
"...to also know that I can think of you as a sister."
Moonlighting
Oh, Agnes, that's wonderful.
"Oh, Agnes, that's wonderful."
Moonlighting
Honestly, I feel the same way about you.
"Honestly, I feel the same way about you."
Moonlighting
Oh, this is such a load off my mind.
"Oh, this is such a load off my mind."
Moonlighting
I've been dragging this beard burn around for days.
"I've been dragging this beard burn around for days."
Moonlighting
I haven't been able to talk to a soul.
"I haven't been able to talk to a soul."
Moonlighting
Burt just tunes me out.
"Burt just tunes me out."
Moonlighting
Even my mother doesn't understand.
"Even my mother doesn't understand."
Moonlighting
Dad never had any body hair.
"Dad never had any body hair."
Moonlighting
So I decided to come to you because I know you'll help.
"So I decided to come to you because I know you'll help."
Moonlighting
I'd be happy to, Agnes...
"I'd be happy to, Agnes..."
Moonlighting
...but what do you want me to do exactly?
"...but what do you want me to do exactly?"
Moonlighting
Nothing.
"Nothing."
Moonlighting
It's just enough knowing that you agree with me.
"It's just enough knowing that you agree with me."
Moonlighting
So now I can tell Burt...
"So now I can tell Burt..."
Moonlighting
...that you don't like having your pantyhose shredded anymore than I do.
"...that you don't like having your pantyhose shredded anymore than I do."
Moonlighting
Hey, I know you two are getting all higgly and giggly...
"Hey, I know you two are getting all higgly and giggly..."
Moonlighting
-...but you gotta check this guy out. -What guy?
"-...but you gotta check this guy out. -What guy?"
Moonlighting
I don't know. I called him Kooky, he didn't seem to mind.
"I don't know. I called him Kooky, he didn't seem to mind."
Moonlighting
Popped in here while you two are having your knitting bee.
"Popped in here while you two are having your knitting bee."
Moonlighting
Is this guy a specimen or what?
"Is this guy a specimen or what?"
Moonlighting
-What does he want? -He brought a video.
"-What does he want? -He brought a video."
Moonlighting
-He wants us to take a look-see. -What is it?
"-He wants us to take a look-see. -What is it?"
Moonlighting
Yeah.
"Yeah."
Moonlighting
But progress is not without its downside, Miss DiPesto.
"But progress is not without its downside, Miss DiPesto."
Moonlighting
Why, someday you, me, Miss Hayes, we may all be replaced by holograms.
"Why, someday you, me, Miss Hayes, we may all be replaced by holograms."
Moonlighting
-We may? - think it's very possible.
"-We may? - think it's very possible."
Moonlighting
Maybe we'd ask him in to talk.
"Maybe we'd ask him in to talk."
Moonlighting
Kooky? I already tried. Cat's got his tongue.
"Kooky? I already tried. Cat's got his tongue."
Moonlighting
You can see the scratch marks on his face.
"You can see the scratch marks on his face."
Moonlighting
The way I figure it is, his boss is your Howard Hughes type.
"The way I figure it is, his boss is your Howard Hughes type."
Moonlighting
Pads around the compound with Kleenex boxes on his feet.
"Pads around the compound with Kleenex boxes on his feet."
Moonlighting
Stores his precious bodily fluids in mayonnaise jars.
"Stores his precious bodily fluids in mayonnaise jars."
Moonlighting
It's a "yechy" world, Agnes.
"It's a "yechy" world, Agnes."
Moonlighting
Maybe the person he works for is just shy.
"Maybe the person he works for is just shy."
Moonlighting
Could be, but my guess is...
"Could be, but my guess is..."
Moonlighting
...he likes to stay home boiling his own underwear.
"...he likes to stay home boiling his own underwear."
Moonlighting
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