Loading...

You're not connected to the Internet. Please check your connection.

Clips from NewsRadio - Wino (S05E05)

Well, Dave, I don't know why you'd lie to me,

"Well, Dave, I don't know why you'd lie to me,"

NewsRadio

but I'm afraid this is something I'm gonna have to hear

"but I'm afraid this is something I'm gonna have to hear"

NewsRadio

Oh, God. I just don't get it.

"Oh, God. I just don't get it."

NewsRadio

Uh, baby, come out. We need to talk.

"Uh, baby, come out. We need to talk."

NewsRadio

Honeybunch, uh, Dave says you don't really want to be with me.

"Honeybunch, uh, Dave says you don't really want to be with me."

NewsRadio

BOTH: Tell him. Tell him. Tell him.

"BOTH: Tell him. Tell him. Tell him."

NewsRadio

Yes, it's true, Johnny. Go away. I don't want you anymore.

"Yes, it's true, Johnny. Go away. I don't want you anymore."

NewsRadio

Look, I know. Yes, we-- We-- We did once have something

"Look, I know. Yes, we-- We-- We did once have something"

NewsRadio

And I have to protect myself.

"And I have to protect myself."

NewsRadio

I would never hurt you again.

"I would never hurt you again."

NewsRadio

Oh.

"Oh."

NewsRadio

I know. But-- No. Uh, no.

"I know. But-- No. Uh, no."

NewsRadio

I'm-- I'm a journalist and you're a wino.

"I'm-- I'm a journalist and you're a wino."

NewsRadio

Oh, baby, I'm the king. I got responsibilities.

"Oh, baby, I'm the king. I got responsibilities."

NewsRadio

Just get out of here, Johnny.

"Just get out of here, Johnny."

NewsRadio

What?

"What?"

NewsRadio

Wow, Lisa.

"Wow, Lisa."

NewsRadio

[CHUCKLES]

"[CHUCKLES]"

NewsRadio

Don't you have any feelings?

"Don't you have any feelings?"

NewsRadio

What did you go and do that for?

"What did you go and do that for?"

NewsRadio

What? I did exactly what you wanted me to do.

"What? I did exactly what you wanted me to do."

NewsRadio

I told you to crush his spirit not...

"I told you to crush his spirit not..."

NewsRadio

[WHIMPERS] ...break his heart.

"[WHIMPERS] ...break his heart."

NewsRadio

You took a guy who was at the bottom

"You took a guy who was at the bottom"

NewsRadio

Poor old, lovable wino.

"Poor old, lovable wino."

NewsRadio

You better find yourself a roommate, Lisa,

"You better find yourself a roommate, Lisa,"

NewsRadio

because I don't know how you can live with yourself.

"because I don't know how you can live with yourself."

NewsRadio

Hi, Johnny.

"Hi, Johnny."

NewsRadio

Lisa. What are you doing here?

"Lisa. What are you doing here?"

NewsRadio

Matthew told me where to find you.

"Matthew told me where to find you."

NewsRadio

Is she a friend of yours, Johnny?

"Is she a friend of yours, Johnny?"

NewsRadio

No, Freddie, I'm just a bum to her.

"No, Freddie, I'm just a bum to her."

NewsRadio

You got a quarter, lady?

"You got a quarter, lady?"

NewsRadio

Johnny, I'm sorry that I was so harsh with you.

"Johnny, I'm sorry that I was so harsh with you."

NewsRadio

I-- I'm sorry.

"I-- I'm sorry."

NewsRadio

Apology accepted. You got a quarter?

"Apology accepted. You got a quarter?"

NewsRadio

You know, this is hard for me too.

"You know, this is hard for me too."

NewsRadio

Well, it's like offering a steak-lover a cocktail weenie

"Well, it's like offering a steak-lover a cocktail weenie"

NewsRadio

but I guess.

"but I guess."

NewsRadio

Well, this is where he was before.

"Well, this is where he was before."

NewsRadio

Uh, we treated you pretty shabbily.

"Uh, we treated you pretty shabbily."

NewsRadio

ALL: Sorry. We're sorry, Johnny.

"ALL: Sorry. We're sorry, Johnny."

NewsRadio

Thanks. Now, if you'll excuse me,

"Thanks. Now, if you'll excuse me,"

NewsRadio

I would like to kiss a friend goodbye.

"I would like to kiss a friend goodbye."

NewsRadio

[CLEARS THROAT]

"[CLEARS THROAT]"

NewsRadio

Yeah, babe?

"Yeah, babe?"

NewsRadio

Marry me, you bum.

"Marry me, you bum."

NewsRadio

Come on, boys.

"Come on, boys."

NewsRadio

What the hell are you doing?

"What the hell are you doing?"

NewsRadio

It's you.

"It's you."

NewsRadio

You can't just walk in here and expect Lisa to marry you.

"You can't just walk in here and expect Lisa to marry you."

NewsRadio

So you're not-- You're not just a-- A drunk, are you?

"So you're not-- You're not just a-- A drunk, are you?"

NewsRadio

he also happens to be a drunken bum,

"he also happens to be a drunken bum,"

NewsRadio

[BOTH LAUGH]

"[BOTH LAUGH]"

NewsRadio

Yeah. To a crisp.

"Yeah. To a crisp."

NewsRadio

Beth, look, it's over. It's just over, okay?

"Beth, look, it's over. It's just over, okay?"

NewsRadio

He's setting me up, but still, I gave him props.

"He's setting me up, but still, I gave him props."

NewsRadio

and we got all the evidence right here.

"and we got all the evidence right here."

NewsRadio

No, but sleeping in your clothes

"No, but sleeping in your clothes"

NewsRadio

You just want me to break his heart.

"You just want me to break his heart."

NewsRadio

and then you know what's gonna happen?

"and then you know what's gonna happen?"

NewsRadio

But that's not it. That's not it.

"But that's not it. That's not it."

NewsRadio

but my mouth just keeps saying, "Oh, Johnny."

"but my mouth just keeps saying, "Oh, Johnny.""

NewsRadio

I can't help myself.

"I can't help myself."

NewsRadio

And then you pushed him in that.

"And then you pushed him in that."

NewsRadio

JIMMY: Right over here?

"JIMMY: Right over here?"

NewsRadio

What are you doing here?

"What are you doing here?"

NewsRadio

Mwah.

"Mwah."

NewsRadio

DAVE: Uh, Johnny,

"DAVE: Uh, Johnny,"

NewsRadio

Getting a little spiffed up for Lisa.

"Getting a little spiffed up for Lisa."

NewsRadio

No, no, I was breaking a dollar for the newspapers.

"No, no, I was breaking a dollar for the newspapers."

NewsRadio

I can handle this. You guys don't have to worry about me.

"I can handle this. You guys don't have to worry about me."

NewsRadio

I love Johnny too.

"I love Johnny too."

NewsRadio

You can cross my heart too, because now it's yours.

"You can cross my heart too, because now it's yours."

NewsRadio

Get rid of him, Dave.

"Get rid of him, Dave."

NewsRadio

[♪]

"[♪]"

NewsRadio

[♪]

"[♪]"

NewsRadio

He's a smelly bum now.

"He's a smelly bum now."

NewsRadio

[♪]

"[♪]"

NewsRadio

I loved him as a fellow macho man.

"I loved him as a fellow macho man."

NewsRadio

Johnny, son, you smell.

"Johnny, son, you smell."

NewsRadio

and everything will be back to normal.

"and everything will be back to normal."

NewsRadio

[♪]

"[♪]"

NewsRadio

Oh, for God's sakes, let this end mercifully.

"Oh, for God's sakes, let this end mercifully."

NewsRadio

but as a lifestyle, it's just too damn frightening.

"but as a lifestyle, it's just too damn frightening."

NewsRadio

But Joe here seems to think

"But Joe here seems to think"

NewsRadio

and I just want to--

"and I just want to--"

NewsRadio

[MUTTERING] Shoot!

"[MUTTERING] Shoot!"

NewsRadio

[SIGHS]

"[SIGHS]"

NewsRadio

The street and the subway.

"The street and the subway."

NewsRadio

You see, Johnny lives on the street now, sir.

"You see, Johnny lives on the street now, sir."

NewsRadio

At the cost of dozens of quarters

"At the cost of dozens of quarters"

NewsRadio

Well, gentlemen, I rest my case.

"Well, gentlemen, I rest my case."

NewsRadio

I won't be long.

"I won't be long."

NewsRadio

No. Did he give you a quarter?

"No. Did he give you a quarter?"

NewsRadio

Says Lisa.

"Says Lisa."

NewsRadio

I mean, can't we just be friends?

"I mean, can't we just be friends?"

NewsRadio