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Clips from Desperate Housewives - It Wasn't Meant to Happen (S02E02)

"Every retreat was always meticulously planned,"
Desperate Housewives
"from women who did not wanna see him go."
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"[engine sputtering]"
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"What the hell is this?"
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""Let's be honest with ourselves. We haven't been happy in a long time.""
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"OK. I'm the one who hasn't been happy then."
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"What do you want me to say?"
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"[engine sputtering]"
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"Come on! Come on!"
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"It never occurred to him that God..."
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"and the wisdom to know the difference."
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"[Mary Alice] The members of the Fairview chapter of A.A."
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"that were downright sinful."
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"I'm sorry. I was just about..."
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"Oh, your A.A. sponsor?"
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"She's a lust trigger. A lust trigger!"
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"This represents 12 months of hard work,"
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"Darlene talked him into cutting people with kids loose."
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"Jerry, I didn't know you had a kid."
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"- [Edie whimpering] - What's going on?"
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"Karl broke up with Edie."
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"Yeah, I figured that..."
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"Yes. Like you wouldn't believe."
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"They're always coming up with excuses to justify being a home-wrecker."
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""He wouldn't have been with me if he was getting it at home.""
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"She's a slutty, slutty whore. Absolutely."
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"Yeah."
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"She's never too young to start accessorising."
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"We think so, but we're a little biased."
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"Oh, I'm Dale. Dale Helm. I'm the baby's birth father."
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"A lot of people have been looking for you."
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"- Spring break, right? - Yeah."
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"Oh, man, we were wasted 24l7."
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"I got the message and just thought my friends were messing with me."
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"and you can sign over full custody to us."
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"Yeah, uh, the thing about that is"
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"- I'm not just gonna kidnap it. - They did!"
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"It is your baby. Just take it!"
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"Try it."
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"- Dumb-ass! - She seems clean."
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"Call the police. Then it's not up to her."
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"You know, I could go to the police myself."
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"I would do anything to keep you here."
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"Ed, hey."
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"Better than Fran and I. We're dead in that department."
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"What are you suggesting? Hookers?"
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"Kind of like,"
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"IMing works."
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"OK, I'm gonna be exhausted, so I'll probably just lay there."
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"there's really no reason for us to end our friendship."
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"The guy's a ticking bomb."
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"You have no idea, the kind of depravity that comes with this disease."
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"- I'm sorry. - Get the hell out of my shop."
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"but you don't have the slightest idea"
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"This is all you are to Peter. Something to satisfy his addiction."
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"That's the one thing you can depend on with addicts."
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"Excuse me. May I ask you something?"
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"Yes, ma'am."
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"Well, um, why don't we get you out of here?"
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"Let's go see a feel-good movie."
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"Why are you being so nice to me?"
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"...then I should go and let you get started with that."
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"You really wanna help me?"
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"[laughs] You gotta be kidding."
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"Drink your milk."
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"I'm pretty sure you said medium."
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"Are you? Well, maybe if you'd written it down,"
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"who Karl just took advantage of."
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"..."Too little, too late, bitch," and then I'd kick her."
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"[sighs]"
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"You know what?"
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"Really? Why?"
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"She just spit in your wings."
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"Uh... sure."
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"Here you go. Extra spicy..."
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"[groaning, screaming]"
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"Mayer! Four on one!"
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"But she does."
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"[Mary Alice] Dale Helm, like all of the students at Parsons Christian Academy,"
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"What he didn't know was that Gabrielle Solis"
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"[cheering]"
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"And we're gonna fry up those birdies for dinner!"
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"[all] God's team! God's team! God's team! God's team!"
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"Let's talk turkey. What is it gonna take to give up the baby?"
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"I can get into the college of my choice."
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"But it's not even his."
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"Hey, it's out of my hands."
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"OK, just do the right thing and sign the release form."
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"[blows whistle]"
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"[door opens]"
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"You keep your noses up, you stay out of trouble,"
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"No pun intended. [chuckles]"
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"or can I finally have dinner at home with my wife?"
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"and I asked her what she was wearing, and she said "a yellow blouse.""
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"For God sakes, it's not brain surgery. Is she still online?"
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"Uh..."
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"until you're trembling.""
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"[chuckling] "Oh, yeah!""
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"[hits keys loudly]"
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"Not sure I know him. Should ask my wife. She organised the party."
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"Hey, Judy. Get over here and act like a hostess!"
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"After you take off your clothes, feel free to jump right in."
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"I'm just... I'm here to pick up my friend Peter."
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"Hey, is that your natural colour?"
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"Yes, I'm aware of that."
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"Disgusting, isn't it?"
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"what my life was like."
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"If I slip again, this is where you could find me."
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"it's dangerous to care about me."
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"A lot of people have over the years, and they all end up getting hurt."
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"Rex said he'd always be faithful."
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"Hey there. Did you have a late night? I hope."
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"It didn't take her long to figure out that I let a stranger seduce her online."
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"I promised her I would fire the person who did it."
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"- You're gonna fire me? - No, of course not."
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"You're too important here. I'm gonna fire Tom."
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"Shouldn't be too difficult, if I look hard enough."
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"Oh, it's still a little red, but I think I got all the hot sauce out."
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"That's good."
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"Oh, you know, I've gotta go. I have a meeting."
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