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Clips from M*A*S*H - Love Story (S01E01)

"—Who is this man in bed with me? -Oh!"
M*A*S*H
"You don‘t know me. I followed you home from the movies."
M*A*S*H
"Out!"
M*A*S*H
"Ofcourse, it was customary at that time..."
M*A*S*H
"for musicians to be subsidized by wealthy patrons."
M*A*S*H
"— becomes even more astounding. — Hi there."
M*A*S*H
"— [L ouise] Hello. — Hiya, Radar."
M*A*S*H
"— [ Laughing Continues] — Tolstoy?"
M*A*S*H
"— Not eating? — We saw it with our own eyes."
M*A*S*H
"Okay, muscles, step behind the screen."
M*A*S*H
"Although I don‘t know anybody else who would."
M*A*S*H
"Oh, I‘m sure. With whom?"
M*A*S*H
"He‘s bright, he‘s a good talker."
M*A*S*H
"Radar? Oh, come on."
M*A*S*H
"Did you see her, Hawkeye? She‘s beautiful."
M*A*S*H
"“The Plays of George Bernard Shaw ”"
M*A*S*H
"Got a provocative sense ofhumor, an inquiring mind. I knowyou‘ll love him."
M*A*S*H
"Thanks for the bottle."
M*A*S*H
"I had a nice time atyour unpacking."
M*A*S*H
"You‘ve got a lot ofwork to do."
M*A*S*H
"“Warand Peace by Leo Tolstoy.""
M*A*S*H
"Bach is easy. |fshe brings him up, youjust smile and you say,"
M*A*S*H
"— Who ? — Shostakovich or Tchaikovsky."
M*A*S*H
"like at a drii/e—in."
M*A*S*H
"for the treatment ofthis disorder."
M*A*S*H
"—Oh, coming. — Listen, this is right upyour alley."
M*A*S*H
"Sir, either stop that or I‘ll call the usher."
M*A*S*H
"It would never occur to people ofyour ilk..."
M*A*S*H
"What are you doing?"
M*A*S*H
"There they are, America‘s kid sweethearts."
M*A*S*H
"— Radar? — Ah, Bach!"
M*A*S*H
"Well, I sometimes get them."
M*A*S*H
"One ofthese days I‘m gonna booby trap her garter belt."
M*A*S*H
"You know how long it‘s been since Radar‘s screwed up a requisition?"
M*A*S*H
"It‘s got a picture ofa vineyard on the label..."
M*A*S*H
"Are you going to enforce the regulations or try to lose it in the shuffle?"
M*A*S*H
"Now?"
M*A*S*H
"— But practice makes perfect. — I‘ve always said that. Yeah."
M*A*S*H
"— That‘s your bored look? — Yeah."
M*A*S*H
"[Whistles]"
M*A*S*H
"Oh, |just drive the welcome wagon."
M*A*S*H
"I guess not."
M*A*S*H
"Wh—What‘s what? What‘s what, Major?"
M*A*S*H
"Considering the almost insurmountable odds against a struggling composer,"
M*A*S*H
"Just familiarize yourself with the names and dates."
M*A*S*H
"He‘s sorry, but he can‘t keep his date with you tonight."
M*A*S*H
"Shall we make it in the women‘s shower, Major?"
M*A*S*H
"Listen, everything is negative."
M*A*S*H
"I borrowed these from Father Mulcahy for training purposes."
M*A*S*H
"What date? I have no date with Major Burns."
M*A*S*H