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Clips from Schitt's Creek - Turkey Shoot (S01E01)

"I can imagine what kind of sad character might..."
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"But not necessarily..."
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"Sad?"
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"You think this is a sad look?"
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"- No. - No."
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"Not the look. No, Jocelyn,"
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"I'm talking about the inner sadness that would come from..."
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"From living in such a..."
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"We have to get drinks. Several drinks."
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"Don't you think? Let's celebrate!"
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"Let's celebrate drinking!"
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"Okay."
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"It's all yours, aim for the face."
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"It's looking at me."
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"Ahh! That's it. You're locked in. It's just you and him."
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"Just point and shoot, David!"
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"Hard to do when you're talking, Bob."
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"There's no one talking now."
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"- Bob, you're talking. - What?"
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"- Stop talking! - Too much talking."
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"Shoot the bird, David! Shoot it."
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"And in the neck."
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"It's still moving."
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"I feel like one of the Manson girls."
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"First one's tough."
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"Even tougher when you shoot it in the neck"
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"'cause then it takes longer to die."
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"So, now what? Do we just..."
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"Wait until its turkey family comes and shoot them too?"
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"Hey. I think I see them."
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"No, no."
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"Yes! Heard you."
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"- Jocelyn! - Hi."
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"- Hi. - I just wanted to say"
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"how fun it was to spend the day with you."
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"Oh, Jocelyn, 'tis I who owes you a big thank you."
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"I also wanted to apologize for Janine ruining your wig."
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"No, don't be silly. I was..."
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"I was about to find a shower cap."
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"I know you hate your hair, Moira."
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"Almost as much as you hate this town."
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"But there's a possibility you could be here a really long time."
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"May I offer you something?"
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"The people here are just trying to help you,"
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"or one of your fashion-y blouses shrinks in the dryer,"
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"and you'll have to go to Janine's"
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"or get a shirt at the Blouse Barn"
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"just like the rest of us."
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"And I would hate for that day to catch you by surprise."
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"It's not my style."
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"You? On you, it's adorable."
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"You have a look that says, "Hi. I'm Jocelyn, and I know who I am!""
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"For that, you're very fortunate. You are."
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"I don't who I am from one moment to the next."
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"So honestly, dear, I envy you, all right?"
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"But if you ever,"
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"ever catch me shopping at the Blouse Barn,"
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"Promise?"
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"Promise."
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"My son is hunting right now with your husband,"
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"so I know you people have guns."
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"What about what we just did makes you think,"
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""Yeah, you know what? I wanna do this year after year after year"?"
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"Was it the lying in the mud part or was it wearing the clothes"
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"that smell like menthol cigarettes and body odor?"
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"'Cause usually it's more fun."
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"Usually Ray comes and gets wasted,"
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"and spends the whole day singing Carole King ballads."
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"David, I..."
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"Need a towel, please."
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"Is that a new wig? Because you are reminding me of someone."
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"Towel, please."
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"You went to Janine's."
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"Yes. Jocelyn took me to..."
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"Oh, um..."
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"I shot a bird in the neck today."
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"It was an indelible image that I had scarred in my mind"
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"I'm gonna get your towel."
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"Don't judge me for what I'm about to ask you to do."
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"- Yeah. - Trapped under a glass."
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"You know, sometimes I forget what life was like before I knew you."
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"Mm-hmm. Ted."
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"- Hunting? - Yeah."
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"You ever killed before?"
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"Wow."
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"Honestly, if you're not gonna shoot it, I'm going to..."
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"you must shoot me in the temple."
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"I know. It's a wig."
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"Yes! My answer's yes, Jocelyn. Thank you."
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"Nothing."
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"I'm stuck looking like every other inmate in this godforsaken prison."
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