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Clips from The Muppet Show (1976) - Leslie Uggams (S03E03)

"Why?"
The Muppet Show (1976)
"It's a little fishy."
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"[laughing]"
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"♪ Mad about the frog ♪"
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"♪ I know it's stupid to be mad about the frog ♪"
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"♪ I'm so ashamed of it ♪"
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"♪ But must admit the sleepless nights ♪"
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"♪ I've had about the frog ♪"
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"♪ On the silver screen ♪"
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"♪ He melts my foolish heart in every little scene ♪"
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"♪ Although I'm quite aware that here and there ♪"
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"♪ Are traces of the cad about the frog ♪"
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"♪ Lord knows I'm not a fool girl ♪"
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"♪ I really shouldn't care ♪"
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"♪ Lord knows I'm not a schoolgirl ♪"
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"♪ In the flurry of her first affair ♪"
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"♪ Will it ever cloy? ♪"
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"♪ This odd diversity of misery and joy ♪"
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"♪ I'm feeling quite insane and young again ♪"
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"♪ And all because I'm mad about the frog ♪"
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"♪ Will it ever cloy ♪"
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"♪ This odd diversity of misery and joy ♪"
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"♪ I'm feeling quite insane and young again ♪"
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"♪ And all because ♪"
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"♪ I'm mad about that frog ♪"
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"[Fozzie] All right, come on!"
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"- You just come with me, you... - [grunting]"
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"Sir, Sergeant, I have just picked up..."
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"Oh, drat, I made a mistake."
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"Now, I'll have to start all over again."
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"No, this is a very serious charge."
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"- What is it? - Littering."
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"Sir, this also is a very serious charge."
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"Oh, yeah? What's the charge?"
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"Impersonating an officer."
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"Can you prove it?"
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"Go ahead, do your stuff."
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"OK, impersonating an officer."
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"- [drum roll] - [clears throat]"
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"Ahh. Of course I can prove it, Sergeant."
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"Go ahead, do your stuff. Ahh."
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"- Hey, that's not bad. - Thank you."
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"Yep, now look, Sergeant,"
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"this is a very dangerous criminal."
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"He should be locked up."
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"I think he should be locked up."
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"Here are the keys. I'll finish up the report."
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"I'm going to lock him up."
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"I should've known better than to try to fool with you, Patrol Bear."
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"Yeah, you're darn tootin'!"
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"- After you. - Thank you."
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"Listen, tell me what kind of food you like and I'll..."
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"[clears throat] Uh, see you later, Sarge."
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"[Sergeant] Right."
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"Sergeant, wait a minute! He locked me in!"
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"Now try to do me."
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"Oh! Sergeant, you don't understand! He got away!"
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"No, that's not me. You still sound like"
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"that dumb bear that brought you in here."
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"Try it again. I have a deep, authoritative voice."
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"Sergeant, will you just turn around, please?!"
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"Better, but keep trying. You need more macho."
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"that first attracted you to her?"
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"Are you kidding? Everything."
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"Really? What does she do?"
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"Camilla!"
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"[flamenco music]"
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"Cha cha cha!"
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"- Oh, wow! - Yeah."
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"Well, I would've thought that was impossible!"
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"No, to find tap shoes for claws."
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"Hello, I am Vend-A-Wish."
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"Deposit a coin and I will answer"
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"any wish you may have."
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"[coin dropping]"
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"Thank you. Now, please state your wish and I will grant it."
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"Oh, I wish I was taller."
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"- Taller. - Yeah."
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"[groaning]"
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"Camilla, I have written a song for you."
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"Sinatra or Mick Jagger will probably wanna record it."
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"[cooing]"
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"[strumming guitar]"
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"♪ Steady ♪"
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"♪ And if you leave, I will alone and lonely sicken ♪"
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"♪ Ready ♪"
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"[clucking]"
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"♪ We're a team and that's a fact ♪"
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"[Camilla clucking]"
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"Oh, listen to the rhymes in the chorus."
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"It's very Cole Porter-y."
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"♪ Camilla ♪"
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"♪ You're sweeter than wine or vanilla, Camilla ♪"
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"[cooing]"
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"♪ Come lie beneath this tree It's a willa ♪"
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"♪ Camilla ♪"
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"[clucking]"
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"♪ Camilla ♪"
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"♪ The night it grows stilla and stilla ♪"
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"♪ Camilla ♪"
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"♪ You're prettier by far than Godzilla ♪"
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"Who are you?"
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"Huh? Me?"
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"Wow! Perfection incarnate!"
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"Wow! Statuesque,"
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"and yet still poultry in every sense."
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"[moaning]"
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"You have that one thing lacking in chickens."
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"[sighs] Bulk."
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"I'm so confused."
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"You are so huge!"
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"I have no idea what you're talking about, sir."
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"And you found me."
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"Lady luck has smiled and showered us"
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"- with that certain thing... - [clucks]"
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"[scoffs]"
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"Never fear, at Muppet Labs we have done extensive research"
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"on shortening long necks."
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"- Then you can help? - Of course."
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"This is our latest therapy technique."
The Muppet Show (1976)
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