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Clips from The Brady Bunch - Mike's Horror-Scope (S01E01)

"♪ It's the story of a man named Brady ♪"
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"♪ They were four men living all together ♪"
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"♪ Yet they were all alone ♪"
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"♪ Till the one day when ♪"
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"♪ The Brady Bunch ♪"
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"Don't buy anything at all.""
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"And she insists that I follow my forecast."
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"Mr. Brady?"
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"It's not nice."
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"Or was it my third?"
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"Your fourth."
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"Well, um... Uh... uh... yes. I... Good."
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"No. It's my pleasure, sweetheart."
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"Hmm?"
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"But what's up?"
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"Well, I can resist her."
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"It's someone who calls me "dahling""
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"and I must be some kind of a nut."
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"Oh, I got seasick and... and sunburned and..."
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"Alice... please, don't even mention food."
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"She hates her factory, and she won't work in it,"
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"Hey, hey, hey, where's that angel of a wife"
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"Now, Michael, dahling"
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"A factory has to be practical"
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"and efficient. There are a thous..."
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"A powder puff?"
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"Well, Michael, dahling, are you finished?"
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"Daddy stays up late, too, doesn't he?"
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"Your daddy is working very hard these days..."
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"He's not here."
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"Bed."
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"You haven't met."
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"Oh, what a charming little cottage."
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"You guessed it."
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"A factory like that will make you famous."
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"Now, dahling, you will start work"
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"Well, there goes Beebe Gallini"
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"Good night, dear."
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"♪ Here's the story ♪"
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"♪ Of a lovely lady ♪"
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"♪ Three very lovely girls ♪"
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"♪ All of them had hair of gold ♪"
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"♪ Like their mother ♪"
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"♪ The youngest one in curls ♪"
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"♪ The lady met this fellow ♪"
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"♪ And they knew that it was much more than a hunch ♪"
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"♪ That this group ♪"
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"♪ Must somehow form a family ♪"
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"♪ That's the way they all became the Brady Bunch ♪"
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"♪ That's the way they became the Brady Bunch. ♪"
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"What are you looking for?"
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"The astrology forecast."
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"Astrology?"
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"Well, Martha swears by it."
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"She calls me up every morning"
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"to see if I'm following what it says."
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"I've got a flash for you."
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"Your friend Martha's a fruitcake."
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"Agreed."
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"Ah, here it is."
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"My chart for tomorrow."
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"What's it say?"
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""Beware of purchases tomorrow."
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"Hey, now, that's the kind of astrology that makes sense."
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"Let me look at mine."
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"No, I knew I shouldn't have read that out loud."
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"I need new shoes."
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"What's so funny?"
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"You think your horoscope was something?"
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"Get a load of mine."
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""A strange woman will soon come into your life.""
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"Oh, where does it say that?"
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"Where? Right there."
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"How about that."
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"Yeah. How about that."
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"I can hardly wait till tomorrow."
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"Good night, honey."
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"Oh, wow."
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"That is not just a cake, Mrs. Brady."
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"That is a thing of beauty, a joy to behold."
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"Mmm. Thanks, Alice."
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"Wait till you taste it tonight."
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"No, thanks. Not at those prices."
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"What prices?"
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"I'll bet every bite will cost a thousand calories,"
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"and I know just where they'll go."
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"Alice is a member of the hip generation."
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"And speaking of hips,"
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"get a load of Greg's blue jeans."
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"See-through jeans."
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"But don't tell Greg that."
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"He'll start a new fad in junior high."
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"I think I'll take the kids shopping"
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"for some new clothes tomorrow."
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"Well, you'd better make that today, Mrs. Brady."
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"Tomorrow the boys are going"
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"on an all-day fishing trip with Mr. Brady."
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"You're taking the girls horseback riding."
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"Right. Well, I suppose I could take them after school today."
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"But don't tell my friend Martha Sheldon."
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"Martha Sheldon?"
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"Well, you know how hooked she is on astrology."
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"And my chart said, don't buy anything today."
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"Isn't that silly?"
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"A grown woman believing in that astrology nonsense."
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"Hmm. Alice, what did your horoscope say today?"
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"Oh, mine said today was great for social activities..."
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"Mrs. Brady, that's dirty pool."
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"I'm going to go round up"
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"some more bottomless britches and things."
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"Hello."
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"Mike. Hi, honey."
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"2:00, and all's well"
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"and no strange women have come into my life yet."
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"Well, if they do, will you please inform me immediately?"
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"Oh, I will, I promise."
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"The moment one walks in, you'll be the first to know."
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"Mike?"
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"Yes, that's me. I... I'm Mike Brady."
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"What's that, dear? Did you say something?"
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