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Clips from Schitt's Creek (2015) - The Roast (S05E05)

"Just... just about a week."
Schitt's Creek (2015)
"It's a really fun piece."
Schitt's Creek (2015)
"Yes, I'm aware, thank you."
Schitt's Creek (2015)
"Thanks, Derek."
Schitt's Creek (2015)
"So all this time I thought... Poor David thought"
Schitt's Creek (2015)
"that you were home, resting your instruments!"
Schitt's Creek (2015)
"- Ohh... - I'm so disappointed."
Schitt's Creek (2015)
"- Sorry, David. - It's okay."
Schitt's Creek (2015)
"However, in the business of show,"
Schitt's Creek (2015)
"skullduggery, when it leads to such thrilling results,"
Schitt's Creek (2015)
"a pinch of moral corruption is a small price to pay."
Schitt's Creek (2015)
"- Oh, is that good? - Yeah, I think so."
Schitt's Creek (2015)
"You choreographed this?"
Schitt's Creek (2015)
"I loosened the pickle jar. Derek merely popped the lid."
Schitt's Creek (2015)
"Very impressed."
Schitt's Creek (2015)
"Was not embarrassed at all."
Schitt's Creek (2015)
"Babe!"
Schitt's Creek (2015)
"I didn't like how we left things this morning."
Schitt's Creek (2015)
"Me neither."
Schitt's Creek (2015)
"I'm the one that should be sorry."
Schitt's Creek (2015)
"No, I should've been more direct,"
Schitt's Creek (2015)
"and we should've just talked this through."
Schitt's Creek (2015)
"And I actually did some research on the Maldives,"
Schitt's Creek (2015)
"and there's this beautiful resort that we could stay at,"
Schitt's Creek (2015)
"it just means we might have to work there part-time,"
Schitt's Creek (2015)
"But I feel like I could teach windsurfing."
Schitt's Creek (2015)
"Of course you've done research on this trip."
Schitt's Creek (2015)
"But you've done too much for me already."
Schitt's Creek (2015)
"You do too much for me."
Schitt's Creek (2015)
"And so I think it's time that I give something back to you."
Schitt's Creek (2015)
"My FitBit?"
Schitt's Creek (2015)
"No. I lost that."
Schitt's Creek (2015)
"is stand between you and this job."
Schitt's Creek (2015)
"You've worked so hard, and I'm proud of you."
Schitt's Creek (2015)
"And so, yes, Ted Mullens,"
Schitt's Creek (2015)
"I will go to the Cayman Islands with you."
Schitt's Creek (2015)
"Uh, you mean the Galapagos?"
Schitt's Creek (2015)
"Yeah, wherever the turtles are."
Schitt's Creek (2015)
"Are you sure, sure?"
Schitt's Creek (2015)
"I can't wait to do this with you."
Schitt's Creek (2015)
"Oh! We're gonna need to shots."
Schitt's Creek (2015)
"Uh, no, no, no, I meant like, vaccinations."
Schitt's Creek (2015)
"Mm..."
Schitt's Creek (2015)
"- insects around, so. - Okay. Okay."
Schitt's Creek (2015)
"Um, this is still very fresh."
Schitt's Creek (2015)
"I made this decision like, two minutes ago,"
Schitt's Creek (2015)
"so why don't we focus more on the beach,"
Schitt's Creek (2015)
"Fair enough."
Schitt's Creek (2015)
"When it comes to making decisions,"
Schitt's Creek (2015)
"Roland likes to go with his gut."
Schitt's Creek (2015)
"And boy, does he have a lot of gut to go with."
Schitt's Creek (2015)
"Ohhhh!"
Schitt's Creek (2015)
"Yes, I do."
Schitt's Creek (2015)
"And look at Bob, pretending to get it."
Schitt's Creek (2015)
"And we all know Gwen, he hasn't gotten it in years!"
Schitt's Creek (2015)
"Oh, that-Ronnie is just crushing it!"
Schitt's Creek (2015)
"I mean, you know, everybody really has so far."
Schitt's Creek (2015)
"Okay, okay, that's all I got for now."
Schitt's Creek (2015)
"So I'm just gonna hand it over to the one"
Schitt's Creek (2015)
"who wears the pants in the Rose family."
Schitt's Creek (2015)
"But Moira is not here right now."
Schitt's Creek (2015)
"So I'm gonna pass it over to Johnny."
Schitt's Creek (2015)
"Head on up there!"
Schitt's Creek (2015)
"I'll tell you what I've got up my sleeve Roland,"
Schitt's Creek (2015)
"a few tasty little rippers that uh..."
Schitt's Creek (2015)
"are more palatable than anything"
Schitt's Creek (2015)
"Jocelyn's been serving up tonight, so."
Schitt's Creek (2015)
"Hey, is that a crack about my cooking?"
Schitt's Creek (2015)
"From the guy who's had four helpings?"
Schitt's Creek (2015)
"Oh, and Bob's joking about me having four helpings,"
Schitt's Creek (2015)
"we all know if you've ever taken your car to Bob's Garage,"
Schitt's Creek (2015)
"he's not necessarily known "four helpings" anyone."
Schitt's Creek (2015)
"Well anyway, a couple of little improvs there"
Schitt's Creek (2015)
"to get started, but uh, uh..."
Schitt's Creek (2015)
"- what was I saying? - Nothing funny so far."
Schitt's Creek (2015)
"Hey Johnny, come on, I've got a white flag,"
Schitt's Creek (2015)
"- why don't you just start waving it? - Ohhh!"
Schitt's Creek (2015)
"Yeah, Roland, may I point out that I was quiet"
Schitt's Creek (2015)
"when everyone else was up here doing their roasts."
Schitt's Creek (2015)
"I wish you were quiet right now!"
Schitt's Creek (2015)
"Well, things seem to be going downhill fast."
Schitt's Creek (2015)
"Which is what the town must've been thinking when Roland"
Schitt's Creek (2015)
"elected himself Mayor."
Schitt's Creek (2015)
"Okay, I'll give him that."
Schitt's Creek (2015)
"The last time anyone saw her this happy"
Schitt's Creek (2015)
"was at a 3-for-1 sale on cargo pants!"
Schitt's Creek (2015)
"Where? Where?"
Schitt's Creek (2015)
"Cargo, I said car-go,"
Schitt's Creek (2015)
"which is what a car is supposed to do..."
Schitt's Creek (2015)
"unless you take it to Bob's Garage!"
Schitt's Creek (2015)
"Well listen, I don't want to overstay my welcome,"
Schitt's Creek (2015)
"I'll keep things short and quick."
Schitt's Creek (2015)
"Which reminds me of the last time I was in Roland's bedroom,"
Schitt's Creek (2015)
"um... well,"
Schitt's Creek (2015)
"I-I wasn't in Roland's bedroom, but the..."
Schitt's Creek (2015)
"- Ah! What was it, Ronnie? - Just sit down, Johnny."
Schitt's Creek (2015)
"Well anyway, the punchline is, it was short and quick."
Schitt's Creek (2015)
"Anyway, I'm gonna quit while I'm ahead, folks."
Schitt's Creek (2015)
"I think it's a little late for that, pal."
Schitt's Creek (2015)
"Good job, Johnny, all right."
Schitt's Creek (2015)
"No, I wish you guys could've been there tonight."
Schitt's Creek (2015)
"I was really ripping into them."
Schitt's Creek (2015)
"Yes, I'm sure you killed them, dear,"
Schitt's Creek (2015)
"with all the venom of a silkworm."
Schitt's Creek (2015)
"Oh, you know what, Moira?"
Schitt's Creek (2015)
"Jealousy doesn't look good on you."
Schitt's Creek (2015)
"Much like that mirrored jumpsuit you wore"
Schitt's Creek (2015)
"to Candy Spelling's 50th!"
Schitt's Creek (2015)
"Why don't you take it easy, Alexis,"
Schitt's Creek (2015)
"Ugh!"
Schitt's Creek (2015)
"- I mean, he's not wrong. - Oh, look at David."
Schitt's Creek (2015)
"Smart enough to get that joke,"
Schitt's Creek (2015)
"but not smart enough to stop wearing sweaters"
Schitt's Creek (2015)
"in the middle of summer."
Schitt's Creek (2015)
"Burn, David!"
Schitt's Creek (2015)
"Okay, here's why that joke didn't work."
Schitt's Creek (2015)
"A worthy competitor emerges."
Schitt's Creek (2015)
"Something the good people at Blockbuster never said"
Schitt's Creek (2015)
"about Rose Video. Ha! Ha!"
Schitt's Creek (2015)
"That was low, like David's standards."
Schitt's Creek (2015)
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