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Clips from Dr. Ken - Ken Tries Standup (S01E01)

"I'm MCing."
Dr. Ken
"I had to be here for you, pal."
Dr. Ken
"You really think so?"
Dr. Ken
"Welcome to the Laugh Factory open mike, everybody!"
Dr. Ken
"Yes!"
Dr. Ken
"You're gonna see some amazing talent tonight."
Dr. Ken
"But first, here's my pal Ken Park!"
Dr. Ken
"Hey. What up, Laugh Factory?!"
Dr. Ken
"Let's get this party started!"
Dr. Ken
"Mm, uh, so, uh, you guys like impressions?"
Dr. Ken
"Okay, here's a classic."
Dr. Ken
"Korean Johnny Carson."
Dr. Ken
""Is that a, uh, John Wayne Bobbitt..."
Dr. Ken
"ja-ji.""
Dr. Ken
"John Wayne Bobbitt?"
Dr. Ken
"His wife chopped off his ja-ji?"
Dr. Ken
"Oh, come on! That's funny!"
Dr. Ken
""Ja-ji" means "penis.""
Dr. Ken
"uh, so, uh, you see a lot of Asian doctors."
Dr. Ken
"- No! - Okay."
Dr. Ken
"Back-up cameras."
Dr. Ken
"What's up with them, huh?"
Dr. Ken
"You ever run over your kids and think,"
Dr. Ken
""Hey, I wish I had a home movie of that?""
Dr. Ken
"What am I even doing up here?"
Dr. Ken
"I'm a doctor."
Dr. Ken
"No matter what happens, I got to"
Dr. Ken
"I'm a doctor."
Dr. Ken
"Yeah, yeah, my parents Korean'd me into it."
Dr. Ken
"Yeah, it's not like my parents forced me into doing this stuff."
Dr. Ken
"It's not like I went up to my dad and said,"
Dr. Ken
"I would never say that."
Dr. Ken
"I mean... I mean, look at me."
Dr. Ken
"Here was my interview."
Dr. Ken
""So, Ken, tell me about yourself.""
Dr. Ken
"Dad, you were awesome."
Dr. Ken
"And I knew you would be. You're welcome."
Dr. Ken
"It's Jamie Masada, owner of the Laugh Factory."
Dr. Ken
"He says he wants to manage me."
Dr. Ken
"So, are you gonna do this?"
Dr. Ken
"I just wanted to prove I could do stand-up, that's all."
Dr. Ken
"Great even, but come on."
Dr. Ken
"What am I gonna do,"
Dr. Ken
"give up being a doctor and become a comedian?"
Dr. Ken
"I'm gonna... I'm gonna hit the road"
Dr. Ken
"Or your own TV show."
Dr. Ken
"I guess you guys are right."
Dr. Ken
"Clark, can you call Tanya at Nail Depot"
Dr. Ken
"This is my old buddy Doug."
Dr. Ken
"I'm in town for a couple days at the Laugh Factory."
Dr. Ken
"You still don't have health insurance,"
Dr. Ken
"I'll leave you some comp tickets at the box office."
Dr. Ken
"Comp tickets?"
Dr. Ken
"But those are hardly ever free."
Dr. Ken
"You guys, why are we sitting here?"
Dr. Ken
"Why? Just 'cause they have tons more education"
Dr. Ken
"I inherited a fortune after that satellite fell on my grandma."
Dr. Ken
"- And who are you? - Family Medicine."
Dr. Ken
"Okay, well, can I at least get my low-sodium soy sauce back?"
Dr. Ken
"I'll buy you that inappropriate video game"
Dr. Ken
"Switch seats with me."
Dr. Ken
"How about Thursday?""
Dr. Ken
"Oh."
Dr. Ken
"with a minor in never losing it."
Dr. Ken
"Why didn't you ever try it?"
Dr. Ken
"Now back to library.""
Dr. Ken
"Dave, push-ups are like riding a bike."
Dr. Ken
"Am I, Madonna Bronkowitz?"
Dr. Ken
"I'm gonna try stand-up."
Dr. Ken
"Oh, and don't forget your purse."
Dr. Ken
"Guys, guess what I'm doing Tuesday night."
Dr. Ken
"like you've been promising?"
Dr. Ken
"that you're gonna drag us into?"
Dr. Ken
"Hear ye."
Dr. Ken
"waving the white flag of surrender."
Dr. Ken
"Anyhoo, I took the bolts off the table."
Dr. Ken
"They're throwing the kids a party."
Dr. Ken
"You've got this, Dave."
Dr. Ken
"You know what some lazy nurses do on their day off?"
Dr. Ken
"Hit you back double this weekend."
Dr. Ken
"and I've got nothing."
Dr. Ken
"Okay, let me help you."
Dr. Ken
"Okay, you don't have to be nasty about it."
Dr. Ken
"I'm gonna suck."
Dr. Ken
"I'm not gonna do this."
Dr. Ken
"No."
Dr. Ken
"All right, Dave, you can do this."
Dr. Ken
"Motivating."
Dr. Ken
"I'm so worried for Ken."
Dr. Ken
"Oh, my God, I just made that up!"
Dr. Ken
"Okay, um..."
Dr. Ken
"Okay, well, yeah... it's true."
Dr. Ken
"to get in med school."
Dr. Ken
""Well, I'm Korean.""
Dr. Ken
"That is pretty ridiculous."
Dr. Ken
"Yeah, yeah, yeah. Back to work, then."
Dr. Ken
"What in the hell are you talking about?"
Dr. Ken
"Great job, Dave!"
Dr. Ken
"Ken, come to bed."
Dr. Ken
"I'm finally doing an open mike at the Laugh Factory."
Dr. Ken
"and tell her next time there's a bubble in my top coat,"
Dr. Ken
"He was amazing."
Dr. Ken
"One, two, three."
Dr. Ken
"Hey, both of our kids are a product"
Dr. Ken
"That's right!"
Dr. Ken
"Uh, excuse me, but I don't think you heard me."
Dr. Ken
"I need it immediately."
Dr. Ken
"Nope. Mol, any guesses?"
Dr. Ken
"when I host the HMO banquet."
Dr. Ken
"What? I never told y'all that story?"
Dr. Ken
"I'll just say it."
Dr. Ken
"So, that's what it's gonna sound like on my end."
Dr. Ken
"Ken got sense of humor from me."
Dr. Ken
"I'll make a deal."
Dr. Ken
"Hey, Parks. Thanks for saving me a seat."
Dr. Ken
"That's light Googling?"
Dr. Ken
"Hey, everybody!"
Dr. Ken
"Wouldn't that be better"
Dr. Ken
"than wondering what if the rest of your life?"
Dr. Ken
"And as soon as those smug bastards"
Dr. Ken
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