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Clips from The Big Bang Theory - The Pancake Batter Anomaly (S01E01)

"Oh, Sheldon. Can't you do that yourself?"
The Big Bang Theory
"VapoRub makes my hands smell funny."
The Big Bang Theory
"- But, Sheldon-- - Please, please, please."
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"I can't believe I'm doing this."
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"No, no. Counterclockwise, or my chest hair mats."
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"Sorry."
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"Can you sing "Soft Kitty"?"
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"What?"
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"My mom used to sing it to me when I was sick."
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"- I'm sorry, honey, I don't know it. - I'll teach you."
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"Now you."
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"Keep rubbing."
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"What do you see? What do you see? I can't--"
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"- Living room appears to be empty. - Okay, he must be in his bedroom."
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"My spare glasses are in my bedroom, on my dresser, next to my bat signal."
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"I'm not going in there."
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"- Raj? - No way, Jose."
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"Wireless mini-cam and Bluetooth headset."
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"We'll be your eyes."
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"- Fine. - One more thing."
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"This is a sub-sonic impact sensor."
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"If Sheldon gets out of bed and starts to walk..."
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"At that point, based on the geography of the apartment and the speed of Sheldon..."
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"No. You'll be on your hands and knees."
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"Now, you'll need to get the sensor close to Sheldon's room."
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"How do I carry it if I'm on my hands and knees?"
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"Stay low."
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"Bear left."
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"- Now keep true. - What?"
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"All right."
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"I just hit my head."
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"Because you didn't keep true."
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"Okay, turn right."
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"Angle your head to the right."
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"Little more."
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"That's it. Now just keep true."
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"All right, you're close enough to Sheldon's room. Deploy the sensor."
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"Now, turn it on."
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"- lt wasn't on? - No."
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"Oh, I guess you didn't."
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"Good. From this point forward, you will have to crawl."
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"I know."
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"Hang on, the sensor's picking up something."
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"Turn your head back."
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"You rat bastard."
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"Hi."
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"You deliberately stuck me with Sheldon."
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"Come on, I had to. You see what he's like."
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"Penny? Penny, I'm hungry."
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"It's okay, sweetie. Good news."
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"- Here you go, good luck, bye. - Oh, wait, wait."
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"- Leonard? I'm hungry. - Wait. Penny, take me with you."
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"Leonard?"
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"I want grilled cheese."
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"Do you think Penny will come here and take care of us?"
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"I don't think Penny's ever coming here again."
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"I'm very congested."
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"Yeah? So?"
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"Can you go to the kitchen and get me the turkey baster labeled, "Mucus"?"
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"If I stand, I'll vomit."
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"Under the sink. Yellow Tupperware bowl."
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"What else would I drink? Gases? Solids? Ionized plasma?"
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"Then call your own mother."
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"I'd like to point out, I voted for orangutan..."
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"Can you please come get him?"
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"Then why did I have to crawl?"
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