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Clips from What We Do in the Shadows - The Escape (S03E03)

"And so on, etcetera. We've all been there."
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"But, as leader of the Vampiric Council..."
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"NADJA: Coleader!"
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"I must swallow my pride and do what is right."
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"It says here that the correct name for The Sire"
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"is, in fact, uh, "G-G-Gajillarum"?"
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"NADJA: I think you swallow the "G," so it's like "Yarilariur.""
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"It doesn't seem right."
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"- Are you sure? - NADJA: No."
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"I need to figure this out before my press conference begins."
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"No, what? We don't need to do a press conference,"
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"we just need to capture the bloody thing."
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"No! I need to let the vampire community know"
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"what is happening and put their mind at ease."
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"'Cause it is I who have failed to perform a very simple job."
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"I don't think we need to-- Oh."
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"Over the power of the ether,"
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"I hereby summon"
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"the vampire society's most respected journalists,"
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"news anchors, bloggers, vloggers"
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"and high school yearbook editors. [grunts]"
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"-[quiet chatter] - Oh, it worked."
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"[clears throat] Thank you all for coming."
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"Is this thing on?"
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"- Are you fucking kidding me? - Uh..."
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"But now is not the time for jokes. [clears throat]"
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"This evening,"
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"at approximately 9:53 in the p.m. Staten Island time,"
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"the creature known as The Sire,"
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"- aka Girlyjim... - Nailed it."
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"...escaped Vampiric Council watch"
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"and is currently at large"
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"- in the tristate area, exact location unknown. -[overlapping chatter]"
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"I, Nandor The Relentless,"
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"co-supreme leader of the Vampiric Council,"
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"- do hereby accept full responsibility for this misstep. -[clamoring]"
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"- Time for questions. - REPORTER: I have a question! - Coleader Nandor."
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"- Yes? - Coleader Nandor, hi."
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"Uh, Lars Murderbone, Orlando Sentinel."
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"Is there currently any kind of plan in place"
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"to capture The Sire?"
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"We have a plan and it is going absolutely perfectly."
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"- So, you can go. - Yes."
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"And you know, there's a lot of speculation saying,"
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""Oh, this is gonna be the end of vampires as we know it.""
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"- What?! -[concerned chatter] - No one asked."
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"Even if that did happen, we've had a wonderful run,"
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"haven't we? We've had a great time."
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"- You've doomed us all! - Oh, no!"
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"Okay, bye."
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"You have just made things significantly worse."
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"[stammers]"
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"- No. No. -[crying]"
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"- Dig there. -[sighs] That's literally what I'm doing right now."
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"Well, dig deeper."
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"I can't remember where we buried the bastard."
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"Might this be him?"
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"COLIN: Uh, that might not."
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"That is the census taker, 1990."
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"- What about this chap? - COLIN: Nope."
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"Oh, for fuck's sake."
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"Now that rock is beginning to ring a bell."
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"That rock there."
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"That does ring a bell, that rock."
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"Baron? Are you there?"
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"BARON: Yes."
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"- COLIN: Oh, my God. - LASZLO: Shit."
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"- GUILLERMO: Did you hear that? - LASZLO: Baron?"
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"- Baron? - Baron? - BARON: I am here."
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"- LASZLO: Here, here. Start digging, man. - COLIN: Here. Come on."
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"-[groans] - Shit."
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"BARON: [grunts] Big pull now. Almost there."
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"[grunts]"
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"-[Baron sighs] - Well, fancy seeing you here, Baron."
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"-[laughing] - We thought you were dead."
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"Well, no, I am not. [laughs]"
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"You see, when you buried me,"
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"I was pretty much dead, but not completely dead."
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"[humming]"
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"NANDOR: Give The Baron his last sip."
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"NADJA: Shall we just get him in?"
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"I was able to slowly regain my strength,"
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"subsisting on the blood-soaked dirt"
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"of the many, many humans you have buried out here."
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"That was a bit of luck."
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"Now, I did try to dig my way to the surface"
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"using just my mouth"
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"and this one arm that is fused to my chest."
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"I guess I was digging sideways instead of up."
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"[laughter]"
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"Yeah, that'll happen when your arm is, uh, yeah."
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"Soon, I recovered enough to cry out"
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"and beg you to dig me up."
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"Uh, "Help! Help!" I cried."
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"- Oh, okay. That was you, then. - LASZLO: Right."
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"Yeah, I heard the screams,"
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"but I just thought it was someone in the neighborhood"
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"in grave danger. I was like, "Not my problem.""
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"That is all in the past,"
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"because I am now back, and I have never felt better."
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"-[laughs] If I, if I could just... get... - COLIN: Well, you look good."
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"[grunts] Oh, oh. Almost. Ah. Yes, okay."
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"- LASZLO: There we go. - BARON: Okay."
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"- Who wants to get smacked first? - LASZLO: Oh. [laughs]"
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"Yeah, it was a little nerve-racking"
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"seeing The Baron again, considering our-our history."
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"[Baron grunts]"
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"♪"
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"But he doesn't seem to remember anything."
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"He was on a lot of drug blood that night, so..."
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"[chuckles]: What he don't know won't hurt him, or me."
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"So nice to be back in the arms"
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"- of a big, strong boy. Mwah. -[Guillermo whimpers]"
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"GUILLERMO: But this means that that Sire theory--"
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""If he dies they all die"--"
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"that might be real."
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"LASZLO: Sorry, Baron. Urgent matter."
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"We must attend to it. Bye!"
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"GUIDE: Feed him. A simple task."
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"NANDOR: I accept full responsibility."
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