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Clips from Station 19 (2018) - Get Up, Stand Up (S04E04)

"I pushed my pain aside and did what had to be done."
Station 19 (2018)
"Same."
Station 19 (2018)
"I saw what happened to Dean Miller."
Station 19 (2018)
"He's suing the police department,"
Station 19 (2018)
"and he's right to do it."
Station 19 (2018)
"But?"
Station 19 (2018)
"[ Clears throat ]"
Station 19 (2018)
"But, uh -- uh, it -- it makes me uncomfortable."
Station 19 (2018)
"Because he's a firefighter"
Station 19 (2018)
"and we're supposed to shut up and look pretty?"
Station 19 (2018)
"No, because when the police"
Station 19 (2018)
"made me lie down on the street like an animal"
Station 19 (2018)
"during a routine traffic stop --"
Station 19 (2018)
"You didn't sue."
Station 19 (2018)
"I didn't do much of anything at all."
Station 19 (2018)
"♪♪"
Station 19 (2018)
"I did yell, you know, whi-- which was..."
Station 19 (2018)
"♪♪"
Station 19 (2018)
"[ Sirens wailing ]"
Station 19 (2018)
"♪♪"
Station 19 (2018)
"I feel like a hypocrite."
Station 19 (2018)
"A hypocrite? Yeah. I have two kids."
Station 19 (2018)
"I have a new son since we last spoke."
Station 19 (2018)
"Congratulations. Thanks."
Station 19 (2018)
"You get any sleep?Well, he's 18, so, you know..."
Station 19 (2018)
"Oh."
Station 19 (2018)
"While I'm not losing sleep because of him --"
Station 19 (2018)
"You're losing sleep overhim."
Station 19 (2018)
"Yeah."
Station 19 (2018)
"Anyway, m-my wife and I, we --"
Station 19 (2018)
"we gave "the talk""
Station 19 (2018)
"and explained that young Black men"
Station 19 (2018)
"don't get to behave any old way they want"
Station 19 (2018)
"when dealing with the police."
Station 19 (2018)
"We told them to do whatever it took to get home safe."
Station 19 (2018)
"But when Ihad a run-in with the police myself,"
Station 19 (2018)
"I -- I-I yelled at that officer"
Station 19 (2018)
"as he got into his car."
Station 19 (2018)
"I mean, if my boys had yelled at a cop like that, I --"
Station 19 (2018)
"You'd be upset with them?"
Station 19 (2018)
"Well, hell, yes, I'd be upset!"
Station 19 (2018)
"I'd...[ Sighs ]"
Station 19 (2018)
"But I'd also be proud."
Station 19 (2018)
"U-- Because they'd be right."
Station 19 (2018)
"You know, I was right."
Station 19 (2018)
"Miller was right."
Station 19 (2018)
"But y-you can't do that."
Station 19 (2018)
"You can't yell at a cop because, you know, w--"
Station 19 (2018)
"because they've got a gun, you know?"
Station 19 (2018)
"They're given authority."
Station 19 (2018)
"They have the power t-- [ Sighs ]"
Station 19 (2018)
"D-Do you have kids?"
Station 19 (2018)
"Three teenagers."
Station 19 (2018)
"Oh, wow. Okay, so, you get just how frustrating"
Station 19 (2018)
"and infuriating it is to pour every ounce"
Station 19 (2018)
"of energy and brain power you have"
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"into them to -- to try and mold them"
Station 19 (2018)
"into confident young men --"
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"to make them honestly believe"
Station 19 (2018)
"that they can accomplish anything,"
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"to -- to work so hard to get them to s-stand tall"
Station 19 (2018)
"and feel good in their own skin --"
Station 19 (2018)
"only to then have to tell them that"
Station 19 (2018)
"because of the color of that skin,"
Station 19 (2018)
"they have to shrink"
Station 19 (2018)
"when in the presence of a police officer."
Station 19 (2018)
"Do you tell them that?"
Station 19 (2018)
"Do you tell them to shrink?"
Station 19 (2018)
"No."
Station 19 (2018)
"No, I -- I don't tell them to shrink."
Station 19 (2018)
"I --"
Station 19 (2018)
"[Sighs]"
Station 19 (2018)
"I tell them to stand with dignity,"
Station 19 (2018)
"and I tell them to de-escalate."
Station 19 (2018)
"I-I tell them that in any confrontational situation,"
Station 19 (2018)
"their job is to de-escalate."
Station 19 (2018)
"But it should be the cop's job."
Station 19 (2018)
"You're right. It should."
Station 19 (2018)
"[ Clears throat ]"
Station 19 (2018)
"So, let me just make sure I have this straight."
Station 19 (2018)
"You're mad at yourself that you didn't do more"
Station 19 (2018)
"after that cop treated you that way,"
Station 19 (2018)
"and you're mad at yourself that you didn't do less"
Station 19 (2018)
"after that cop treated you that way."
Station 19 (2018)
"Because Miller's doing more,"
Station 19 (2018)
"and because you want your boys to do less."
Station 19 (2018)
"Look..."
Station 19 (2018)
"I'm exhausted, you know?"
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"[ Stammers ]"
Station 19 (2018)
"I'm exhausted by navigating a -- a w-- a world"
Station 19 (2018)
"that sees me and -- and my kids as a threat."
Station 19 (2018)
"I mean, it's -- it's this --"
Station 19 (2018)
"it's this constant nagging worry"
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"that -- that never goes away."
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"And i-if I do manage to forget and just --"
Station 19 (2018)
"you know, just exist..."
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"♪♪"
Station 19 (2018)
"...a comment or a look"
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"or the news that a man has been killed in the street"
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"reminds me that I have to be careful."
Station 19 (2018)
"And -- And it steals all of my mental and emotional energy"
Station 19 (2018)
"that I should be giving to my wife"
Station 19 (2018)
"and my kids and my health."
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"Is something going on with your health?"
Station 19 (2018)
"♪♪"
Station 19 (2018)
"Being Black in America is a life-threatening condition."
Station 19 (2018)
"Other than that..."
Station 19 (2018)
"♪♪"
Station 19 (2018)
"Seattle protests continued late into the evening last night"
Station 19 (2018)
"with police presence on the scene."
Station 19 (2018)
"Should we go?"
Station 19 (2018)
"Can we?"
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"I mean, after shift."
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"No, still -- can we?Oh, you mean --"
Station 19 (2018)
"Because we're FD."
Station 19 (2018)
"I mean, is that an official policy?"
Station 19 (2018)
"Do they have to say anything? We know."
Station 19 (2018)
"Well, it's a free country, so..."
Station 19 (2018)
"In theory."
Station 19 (2018)
"But the Department's a public entity."
Station 19 (2018)
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