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Clips from Louie (2010) - Dad (S03E03)

Yeah, yeah.

"Yeah, yeah."

Louie (2010)

Then tell me.

"Then tell me."

Louie (2010)

I got this show and-- That's wonderful.

"I got this show and-- That's wonderful."

Louie (2010)

Listen, why I want to see you-- Okay.

"Listen, why I want to see you-- Okay."

Louie (2010)

I was in Boston yesterday

"I was in Boston yesterday"

Louie (2010)

They're representing Mexico

"They're representing Mexico"

Louie (2010)

at an international finance-analysis conference

"at an international finance-analysis conference"

Louie (2010)

He had this wonderful credenza

"He had this wonderful credenza"

Louie (2010)

and I asked him about it and he said...

"and I asked him about it and he said..."

Louie (2010)

Well, he was this kind of man-- hmm--

"Well, he was this kind of man-- hmm--"

Louie (2010)

who has a hunting dog by his side

"who has a hunting dog by his side"

Louie (2010)

You know, like... like this kind of man, you know?

"You know, like... like this kind of man, you know?"

Louie (2010)

And so this duke, I said to him,

"And so this duke, I said to him,"

Louie (2010)

"What a wonderful credenza."

""What a wonderful credenza.""

Louie (2010)

And he says, "I must make you a gift of one."

"And he says, "I must make you a gift of one.""

Louie (2010)

You know?

"You know?"

Louie (2010)

This-- this kind of...

"This-- this kind of..."

Louie (2010)

"Mmm, mmm, mmm..."

""Mmm, mmm, mmm...""

Louie (2010)

And so he gave me one

"And so he gave me one"

Louie (2010)

and I had it shipped to Boston

"and I had it shipped to Boston"

Louie (2010)

by the most excellent

"by the most excellent"

Louie (2010)

historical carpenter in Boston.

"historical carpenter in Boston."

Louie (2010)

And while I was in Boston, I saw your father.

"And while I was in Boston, I saw your father."

Louie (2010)

Yes.

"Yes."

Louie (2010)

Waiter.

"Waiter."

Louie (2010)

given to me by my father,

"given to me by my father,"

Louie (2010)

your abuelo.

"your abuelo."

Louie (2010)

I gave that horse to your father to care for

"I gave that horse to your father to care for"

Louie (2010)

and in three months, he let my horse die.

"and in three months, he let my horse die."

Louie (2010)

Yeah.

"Yeah."

Louie (2010)

So...

"So..."

Louie (2010)

so that he won't catch her wretchedness,

"so that he won't catch her wretchedness,"

Louie (2010)

he's acting in the interest of his family

"he's acting in the interest of his family"

Louie (2010)

so that he won't take it home to his wife.

"so that he won't take it home to his wife."

Louie (2010)

That's-- that's a question?

"That's-- that's a question?"

Louie (2010)

between a father and a son,

"between a father and a son,"

Louie (2010)

there can be no separation.

"there can be no separation."

Louie (2010)

No boundary.

"No boundary."

Louie (2010)

A father beckons, a son comes.

"A father beckons, a son comes."

Louie (2010)

This is for life, Louie.

"This is for life, Louie."

Louie (2010)

I saw your father.

"I saw your father."

Louie (2010)

He was alone.

"He was alone."

Louie (2010)

He has no one.

"He has no one."

Louie (2010)

I could not even look at him and he cried to me,

"I could not even look at him and he cried to me,"

Louie (2010)

"Ooh, my son, he does not call me, does not see me."

""Ooh, my son, he does not call me, does not see me.""

Louie (2010)

It was disgusting, like a woman.

"It was disgusting, like a woman."

Louie (2010)

Listen, can I just--

"Listen, can I just--"

Louie (2010)

You go and see your father.

"You go and see your father."

Louie (2010)

For shame.

"For shame."

Louie (2010)

Shame on you, shame on you, Louie, shame on you.

"Shame on you, shame on you, Louie, shame on you."

Louie (2010)

Go and see your father.

"Go and see your father."

Louie (2010)

You go and see him.

"You go and see him."

Louie (2010)

Yes.

"Yes."

Louie (2010)

Yes.

"Yes."

Louie (2010)

Shame.

"Shame."

Louie (2010)

Make a bet, man.

"Make a bet, man."

Louie (2010)

Give me a second.

"Give me a second."

Louie (2010)

You already took 7,000.

"You already took 7,000."

Louie (2010)

I'm trying to figure out what to do.

"I'm trying to figure out what to do."

Louie (2010)

Well, then fold.

"Well, then fold."

Louie (2010)

Don't tell him to fold, I want his money.

"Don't tell him to fold, I want his money."

Louie (2010)

And after all that, he calls.

"And after all that, he calls."

Louie (2010)

I raise it five. Five?!

"I raise it five. Five?!"

Louie (2010)

That's like the cheesiest--

"That's like the cheesiest--"

Louie (2010)

I don't have five.

"I don't have five."

Louie (2010)

Yeah, but shipping would be, like, five bucks.

"Yeah, but shipping would be, like, five bucks."

Louie (2010)

I'd clear $2.

"I'd clear $2."

Louie (2010)

And then I'd also have big bloody holes

"And then I'd also have big bloody holes"

Louie (2010)

where my tits used to be.

"where my tits used to be."

Louie (2010)

In the titty hole?

"In the titty hole?"

Louie (2010)

Oh, my God.

"Oh, my God."

Louie (2010)

♪ Rah-rah-rah-rah-rah rah-rah-rah... ♪

"♪ Rah-rah-rah-rah-rah rah-rah-rah... ♪"

Louie (2010)

Oh, you left something in here, Jim.

"Oh, you left something in here, Jim."

Louie (2010)

Give me that, give me that, give me that. Wait, wait, whoa.

"Give me that, give me that, give me that. Wait, wait, whoa."

Louie (2010)

What is this?

"What is this?"

Louie (2010)

Oh, my God. Drawn by a child, I guess.

"Oh, my God. Drawn by a child, I guess."

Louie (2010)

Please, please, give me that, please.

"Please, please, give me that, please."

Louie (2010)

Jim, why do you have a child's crude drawing

"Jim, why do you have a child's crude drawing"

Louie (2010)

of a woman with a scribbly bush

"of a woman with a scribbly bush"

Louie (2010)

sucking a big cock?

"sucking a big cock?"

Louie (2010)

I drew it.

"I drew it."

Louie (2010)

You're gonna have to tell the story. There's no story.

"You're gonna have to tell the story. There's no story."

Louie (2010)

- You drew this? - Okay, can we play poker?

"- You drew this? - Okay, can we play poker?"

Louie (2010)

Why did you draw that? Tell the story now.

"Why did you draw that? Tell the story now."

Louie (2010)

Because, um, I get horny

"Because, um, I get horny"

Louie (2010)

And when I was growing up, we didn't have "Playboys,"

"And when I was growing up, we didn't have "Playboys,""

Louie (2010)

'cause they weren't allowed and my mother would

"'cause they weren't allowed and my mother would"

Louie (2010)

Like this?

"Like this?"

Louie (2010)

Big tits and big hairy pussies. That's been in your pocket since you was a kid?

"Big tits and big hairy pussies. That's been in your pocket since you was a kid?"

Louie (2010)

No, stupid, I just-- I draw them regularly. Let me get this straight.

"No, stupid, I just-- I draw them regularly. Let me get this straight."

Louie (2010)

I think it's sweet.

"I think it's sweet."

Louie (2010)

You still draw like a little kid.

"You still draw like a little kid."

Louie (2010)

I know.. All right, all right.

"I know.. All right, all right."

Louie (2010)

This is new, this is new. Yes, it's new.

"This is new, this is new. Yes, it's new."

Louie (2010)

And you jerk off to this? Yes, I do.

"And you jerk off to this? Yes, I do."

Louie (2010)

So what?

"So what?"

Louie (2010)

Can you go to the doughnut shop and get me a cruller?

"Can you go to the doughnut shop and get me a cruller?"

Louie (2010)

Did you guys see this article in "The New York Times"?

"Did you guys see this article in "The New York Times"?"

Louie (2010)

It was about ancient forms of pornography

"It was about ancient forms of pornography"

Louie (2010)

and they're talking about wood carvings from the--

"and they're talking about wood carvings from the--"

Louie (2010)

Whoa!

"Whoa!"

Louie (2010)

That's it, I'm out.

"That's it, I'm out."

Louie (2010)

Oh! Ugh.

"Oh! Ugh."

Louie (2010)

I know I tell a bad story, but wow.

"I know I tell a bad story, but wow."

Louie (2010)

throwing up all over the... place.

"throwing up all over the... place."

Louie (2010)

I'm sorry, I don't know what happened.

"I'm sorry, I don't know what happened."

Louie (2010)

Jesus, Louie, you got me right in the face!

"Jesus, Louie, you got me right in the face!"

Louie (2010)

We ll. So what is this?

"We ll. So what is this?"

Louie (2010)

And if they do, it's usually...

"And if they do, it's usually..."

Louie (2010)

I have a rash and I'm vomiting for no reason.

"I have a rash and I'm vomiting for no reason."

Louie (2010)

is what else might be going on.

"is what else might be going on."

Louie (2010)

You know, what else is going on?

"You know, what else is going on?"

Louie (2010)

In your life, what's new?

"In your life, what's new?"

Louie (2010)

Any new stress?

"Any new stress?"

Louie (2010)

Well, no, I mean, I got kids and I work,

"Well, no, I mean, I got kids and I work,"

Louie (2010)

might as well be a maggot sucking a dead cat's face,

"might as well be a maggot sucking a dead cat's face,"

Louie (2010)

I had a Cornish hen.

"I had a Cornish hen."

Louie (2010)

Um...

"Um..."

Louie (2010)

The Russian Tea Room.

"The Russian Tea Room."

Louie (2010)

Fancy.

"Fancy."

Louie (2010)

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