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Clips from Friends - The One with the Birth (S01E01)

"I'll be in the waiting room, handing out cigars."
Friends
"We might be here for a while. Things might get musical."
Friends
"- Where have you been? - We stopped at the gift shop."
Friends
"I used to have that bumper sticker."
Friends
"You see what I mean?"
Friends
"- How's my favorite parenting team? - Dr. Franzblau."
Friends
"- How are your contractions? - I love them."
Friends
"- At the nurse's station. - I'll get it!"
Friends
"Hi. Thought you might like some ice chips."
Friends
"Nice to meet you. I'm Dr. Franzblau."
Friends
"Knick fan?"
Friends
"They suck, all right?"
Friends
"- Oh, sorry. - That's okay. I'm fine."
Friends
"They're tiny and chubby And so sweet to touch"
Friends
"Now they're yelling at you And you don't know why"
Friends
"I don't even have one. How come they get two?"
Friends
"Why won't I be married when I'm 40?"
Friends
"I just meant hypothetically."
Friends
"What is it? Is there something unmarriable about me?"
Friends
"It's an important day. I want to look nice."
Friends
"No, I am not alone. Joey's here."
Friends
"Yeah, it's me."
Friends
"No, we're just friends."
Friends
"The Celtics problem is that the players run the team."
Friends
"Jamie was the name of Susan's first girlfriend..."
Friends
"Ow! Leg cramp!"
Friends
"No, you don't."
Friends
"- Thanks. - See what you did?"
Friends
"- This is so your fault. - How is this my fault?"
Friends
"There's a lot of things Carol never did before me."
Friends
"Hey. Okay, all right. That's it. Get in here."
Friends
"- You find them? - Not in the gift shop or cafeteria...."
Friends
"If you find anyone, or parts of anyone..."
Friends
"Okay, everyone stand back."
Friends
"Mom, everything's going fine."
Friends
"I'm not even thinking about babies yet."
Friends
"But it's hard when, when you do what I do. It's, like...."
Friends
"Well, for instance, what do you do?"
Friends
"No, this is a loaner."
Friends
"Ours is at the shop."
Friends
"God, I hope she has my brains."
Friends
"- You're doing it too hard. - You have to do it hard or else"
Friends
"Damn it. Damn it."
Friends
"I barely had enough pieces to make one whole parent."
Friends
"And here's this baby who has three whole parents..."
Friends
"I'm sorry. You were fighting."
Friends
"Relax. You're only at 9 centimeters, and the baby's at zero station."
Friends
"Somebody wanna help me? Trying to rip out my heart."
Friends
"That's great. Anybody seen a nipple?"
Friends
"Ten centimeters. Here we go."
Friends
"- Okay, got the vent open. - Hi, I'm Ben."
Friends
"What do you see?"
Friends
"Wait. You forgot your legs."
Friends
"- Push. Push. - We're here. We're here."
Friends
"There's too many people here. There's about to be one more."
Friends
"So if you're not an ex-husband or lesbian life partner, out you go."
Friends
"Let me see. I've gotta see."
Friends
"- Hello? - Oh, sorry."
Friends
"What do you see? What do you see?"
Friends
"...and it's a boy, definitely a boy."
Friends
"Legs, knees and feet."
Friends
"He's a person."
Friends
"IKind of like my Uncle Ed, covered in Jell-O."
Friends
"Ben's good. How come you never mentioned Ben before?"
Friends
"- Can we come in? - Yeah, come on."
Friends
"Ben..."
Friends
"...Iike this."
Friends
"He is so amazing."
Friends
"Nope, this is pretty much it."
Friends
"I'll see you guys later."
Friends
"She's having my baby, and she's not here yet."
Friends
"- Has her water broken yet? - I don't know."
Friends
"When we talked, she said she'd already passed the mucous plug."
Friends
"Do we have to know about that?"
Friends
"Joey's made arrangements to have his baby in a movie from the '50s."
Friends
"She could be giving birth in the cab."
Friends
"...and then 50 cents for each additional contraction."
Friends
"What, it's okay when Chandler does it?"
Friends
"- She's not here yet. - What's with the guitar?"
Friends
"I got this, and Susan wanted a Chunky."
Friends
"You're having a baby. You don't stop for Chunkies."
Friends
"- "Stopped for a Chunky." - Let it go, Ross."
Friends
"I got an extra one. You want this?"
Friends
"I understand you're thinking of having a baby."
Friends
"I see you're nine months pregnant. That's a good start."
Friends
"Each one's like a little party in my uterus."
Friends
"- Every 4 minutes, lasting 55 seconds. - 59 seconds. Quartz."
Friends
"- No, I'll get it. - No, I'm getting it."
Friends
"- Thanks. - And if you need anything else I..."
Friends
"...do not believe we've met."
Friends
"I'm Carol's ex-husband's sister's roommate."
Friends
"I want a baby."
Friends
"Not tonight, honey. I got an early day tomorrow."
Friends
"- Get up. Let's get some coffee. - Okay, because we never do that."
Friends
"Shoot, shoot, shoot. Or just fall down. That's good too."
Friends
"- And who do you like? - Celtics."
Friends
"Celtics? They couldn't hit a boat if"
Friends
"Wait...."
Friends
"Let me get the father. We need a father over here."
Friends
"There's no father."
Friends
"Okay. Right this way."
Friends
"All the other pregnant women seem to be going in here."
Friends
"But soon they'll grow up And resent you so much"
Friends
"And you cry and you cry And you cry"
Friends
"- Thanks, Ross. - I'm paying you to stop."
Friends
"Oh, look, twins. Hi, guys. Oh, cute."
Friends
"Tell you what. When we're 40, if neither of us are married..."
Friends
"...what do you say we have one?"
Friends
"Hypothetically, why won't I be married when I'm 40?"
Friends
"Dear God! This parachute is a knapsack."
Friends
"Look at you, dressy-dress."
Friends
"Did you go home and change?"
Friends
"Where is he? He is supposed to be here."
Friends
"What's the deal with you and doctors? Is your father a doctor?"
Friends
"Yeah. Why?"
Friends
"No reason."
Friends
"No, I am not calling him."
Friends
"What do you mean "Joey who"?"
Friends
"Joey who?"
Friends
"- Tribbiani. - Joey Tribbiani."
Friends
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