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Clips from Glee - The Untitled Rachel Berry Project (S05E05)

"Just the smell of it gives me the Lady Di's."
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"Oh, I'm s... Hello. I am Rachel Berry."
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"to my friends... Oh, no, no, don't bother."
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"I have a thing about names."
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"Oh. Jonathan says it's"
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"a form of narcissism,"
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"but I think it's related to my anxiety disorder."
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"He's my Tuesday-Thursday shrink."
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"At least I think that's his name. You know,"
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"that wonton smell's going straight to my tummy."
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"Bathroom. Now. It-It's right there."
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"Okay."
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"Oh, I'm really excited to be working with you,"
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"by the way, Randy."
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"It's gonna be a blast."
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"Okay, let's start writing!"
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""The Untitled Mary Halloran"
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"Yes!"
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"So..."
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"tell me about yourself."
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"Amazing!"
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"We can use that!"
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"Oh, good. Okay."
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"Do they work for NASA?"
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"No, they don't."
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"Gay..."
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"So, you're a senior?"
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"Um, yes, I-I started out in my high school glee club, so..."
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"Irrelevant!"
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"We can't use that."
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"Oh. I'm so sorry. The a capella thing is so over."
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"But you're on Broadway."
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"Yeah!"
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"Uh! What's that like?"
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"It's amazing. Um, I-I do eight shows"
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"a week, so it's a little, you know, tiring, but..."
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"Lazy."
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"I'm sorry?"
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"Mm! What is Mary-bot's process?"
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"Does not compute."
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"Meh! Meh! Meh! Meh!"
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"Okay. Um..."
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"so, how-how did you..."
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"start writing?"
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"Well, my freshman year"
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"at Princeton, I wrote a version"
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"of The Diary of Anne Frank,"
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"where Anne was played by an upright Oreck vacuum cleaner."
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"It transferred to New York, where I won an Obie,"
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"and then I got a MacArthur Genius Grant."
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"- Oh, wow. - Oh!"
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"I'm so bored! Too much work!"
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"I'm not gonna pee."
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"I'm just gonna snoop through the cabinets."
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"But before you say anything, remember that it's Opposite Day."
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"Yes?"
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"Thank you."
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"Miss Jones, here we are with the launch"
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"of your nationwide tour of shopping malls."
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"and mall appearances and glamorous events"
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"how do you feel?"
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"You know, I feel absolutely amazing."
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"We're gonna meet up with Santana in Reno,"
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"and I even got the label to bring along my girl Brittany"
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"as my star backup dancer."
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"We're gonna be like Charlie's Angels!"
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"I get to be Farrah... no arguments."
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"I'm the Angel that torches stuff with her laser eyes."
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"♪ Oh, ooh ♪"
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"♪ Oh, ooh, ah ♪"
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"♪ Hey, hey ♪"
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"♪ Hey, hey! ♪"
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"♪ Oh, oh, oh, oh ♪"
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"♪ Sh-Sh-Sh-Shakin' my head ♪"
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"♪ Every day when I awaken ♪"
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"♪ Sh-Sh-Shakin' my head ♪"
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"♪ The questions got my head a-shakin' ♪"
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"♪ Oh, oh ♪"
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"♪ Like why does gravy give you heart attacks? ♪"
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"♪ Whoa, oh, oh ♪"
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"♪ And why do Republicans hate the blacks, hate the blacks ♪"
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"♪ Hate the blacks? And how come Jesus looks ♪"
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"♪ Just like a white guy ♪"
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"♪ When he's from Palestine? ♪"
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"♪ Sh-Sh-Shakin' my head, sh-sh-shakin' my head ♪"
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"♪ Oh, sh-sh-shakin' my head, sh-sh-shakin' my head, hey ♪"
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"♪ No, no, sh-sh-shakin' my head, sh-sh-shakin' my head ♪"
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"♪ No, no, no, no ♪"
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"♪ Oh, oh, oh ♪"
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"♪ Oh, oh, oh, oh ♪"
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"♪ Hey, hey, hey, oh, oh ♪"
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"♪ When I fly on up to Heaven, God will set me straight ♪"
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"♪ Like how come I drink Diet Coke ♪"
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"♪ And I keep gaining weight? ♪"
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"♪ Jesus, my Lord and Savior ♪"
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"♪ Yeah, you know it's true ♪"
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"♪ Ooh, oh, oh, oh ♪ ♪ Sh-Sh-Shakin' my head ♪"
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"♪ Yeah, yeah ♪ ♪ Sh-Sh-Shakin' my head ♪"
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"♪ Hey, hey, hey ♪ ♪ Sh-Sh-Shakin' my head ♪"
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"♪ Yeah, yeah, yeah, oh, yeah ♪ ♪ Sh-Sh-Shakin' my head ♪"
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"♪ Sh-Sh-Shakin' my head, sh-sh-shakin' my head ♪"
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"♪ People, oh, oh, oh ♪"
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"♪ Wonder ♪"
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"♪ About the world today ♪"
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"♪ Hey, I don't, I don't know ♪"
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"♪ I don't know ♪"
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"♪ No ♪"
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"♪ Ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh ♪"
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"♪ Oh, oh, oh, ah. ♪"
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"Blaine."
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"Come."
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"- I brought BabyCakes. - Oh."
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"- What were you doing up there? - Oh, I like"
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"to measure the stage to see how many paces"
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"I have in each direction... that way"
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"if I decide to freestyle,"
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"I won't fall on my ass into the crowd."
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"Oh."
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"You know, success depends on three things."
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"It depends on talent, hard work and... luck,"
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