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Clips from Seinfeld - The Cafe (S03E03)
"- Here you go. - How did you do?"
Seinfeld
"- Piece of cake. - What happened to the test?"
Seinfeld
"What? Oh, I spilled some food on it."
Seinfeld
"Food? What food?"
Seinfeld
"What are you talking about?"
Seinfeld
"Where did you get food?"
Seinfeld
"- From my pocket. - Your pocket?"
Seinfeld
"I had a sandwich in my pocket."
Seinfeld
"- Where did you get the coffee? - Where did I get the coffee?"
Seinfeld
"Where do you think I got the coffee? At the grocery store."
Seinfeld
"- How did you get there? - I walked."
Seinfeld
"How did you get out? I didn't see you leave."
Seinfeld
"- I climbed out the window. - You climbed out the window?"
Seinfeld
"- Of course. - Why didn't you go out the door?"
Seinfeld
"The door?"
Seinfeld
"You're a fascinating man, George Costanza."
Seinfeld
"The average person sees a situation like this..."
Seinfeld
"...they walk right by it."
Seinfeld
"- Not me. - You're very special."
Seinfeld
"Hey, do me a favour."
Seinfeld
"Some guy comes looking for me, tell him you don't know where I am."
Seinfeld
"Of course. I always do."
Seinfeld
"No, no, it's that guy. He's really been bugging me about the jacket."
Seinfeld
"- Just give it back to him. - He'll have to kill me."
Seinfeld
"How did you do on the IQ test?"
Seinfeld
"Eighty-five!"
Seinfeld
"Eighty-five?"
Seinfeld
"Well, well, well..."
Seinfeld
"Well, I'm no genius..."
Seinfeld
"...but according to my calculations, he should be here in a few seconds."
Seinfeld
"Yeah, but an 85? Jerry, that's ridiculous."
Seinfeld
"Well, maybe the test was gender-biased."
Seinfeld
"You know, a lot of questions on hunting and testicles."
Seinfeld
"Oh, hello, professor."
Seinfeld
"- George, I cannot believe- - Please."
Seinfeld
"- No, there's gotta be a mistake. - You should have seen her face."
Seinfeld
"It was the same look my father gave me..."
Seinfeld
"...when I told him I wanted to be a ventriloquist."
Seinfeld
"But an 85?"
Seinfeld
"Listen, there were too many distractions there."
Seinfeld
"It was a madhouse."
Seinfeld
"Jerry, it was."
Seinfeld
"- Let me take it again. - Forget it."
Seinfeld
"Oh, come on. Come on. I'll guarantee you 140."
Seinfeld
"- What do you have to lose? - You could do worse!"
Seinfeld
"Take it here. I'll leave. There will be no distractions."
Seinfeld
"Sorry I missed the grand reopening. I was out of town for about a week."
Seinfeld
"You see how I listen?"
Seinfeld
"I work very hard, borrow more money."
Seinfeld
"I think it's fantastic. It has a certain indefinable charm."
Seinfeld
"- You wish to eat? - Let me tell you something, Babu."
Seinfeld
"No, not very good..."
Seinfeld
"...very great."
Seinfeld
"The IQ tests always have that sample question at the beginning..."
Seinfeld
"...where they show you how to fill in the circle."
Seinfeld
"This should be the first elimination point right there."
Seinfeld
"Anybody goes outside that circle:"
Seinfeld
"You wanna come with us, please? Yeah, you're done. Your test is over."
Seinfeld
"You went outside the circle, okay?"
Seinfeld
"- Open up, Kramer! - What did you come in here for?"
Seinfeld
"Well, I thought I'd throw him off. See, he knows where I live."
Seinfeld
"Look, Kramer, I have to return this test. I've gotta get out of here."
Seinfeld
"- I thought you took the test. - I had to take it again."
Seinfeld
"- How come? - What's the difference?!"
Seinfeld
"Come on, Kramer, I want that jacket back!"
Seinfeld
"Never!"
Seinfeld
"Come on, George, open up."
Seinfeld
"- Well? - How you doing?"
Seinfeld
"Where's the test?"
Seinfeld
"You know, it's the damnedest thing."
Seinfeld
"Babu..."
Seinfeld
"Babu."
Seinfeld
"...you know, I've gotta tell you, I never do this, but the shrimp..."
Seinfeld
"...it's just a little stringy."
Seinfeld
"- You have any chicken? - The shrimp is stringy?"
Seinfeld
"- Well, maybe you refrigerated- - Quiet!"
Seinfeld
"- No, I- - You shut up!"
Seinfeld
"You make me change restaurant, but nobody come!"
Seinfeld
"You say make Pakistani. Babu Bhatt have only Pakistani restaurant."
Seinfeld
"But where are people? You see people? Show me people!"
Seinfeld
"You very, very bad man."
Seinfeld
"Bad man? Could my mother have been wrong?"
Seinfeld
"Are you looking for George?"
Seinfeld
"Kind of."
Seinfeld
"George left."
Seinfeld
"Is that the test?"
Seinfeld
"This?"
Seinfeld
"Yeah."
Seinfeld
"I hope you do a lot better this time."
Seinfeld
"Actually, I think I did."
Seinfeld
"The first time, I couldn't really concentrate."
Seinfeld
"Come on, let's not stand here too long. We might run into her."
Seinfeld
"Aren't you cold? Where's your jacket?"
Seinfeld
"- Oh, sorry. - I'm going upstairs."
Seinfeld
"Hey, guys. I just ran into Monica. You know what my IQ is?"
Seinfeld
"One fifty-one."
Seinfeld
"- One fifty-one? - Yeah."
Seinfeld
"That's a good score."
Seinfeld
"So, what are you up for? How about Mexican?"
Seinfeld
"- Italian. - No, Chinese."
Seinfeld
"You know what would be great?"
Seinfeld
"It's tough to do a good deed. Let's look at your professional good-deed doers:"
Seinfeld
"Your Lone Rangers, your Supermen..."
Seinfeld
"They're all wearing disguises. Masks over their faces, secret identities."
Seinfeld
"Don't want people to know who they are. Too much aggravation."
Seinfeld
"Superman, thanks for saving my life..."
Seinfeld
"It's like some sort of Bermuda Triangle of retail."
Seinfeld
"All right, I'm sorry. Go ahead. You're taking the IQ test."
Seinfeld
"Oh, the IQ thing. Yeah."
Seinfeld
"- What did you get? - What did I get, or what do I say I got?"
Seinfeld
"Bazooka Joe."
Seinfeld
"My house. You gotta be on the lease to press the buzzer."
Seinfeld
"Come on up."
Seinfeld
"I know."
Seinfeld
"- I'll get this. - Oh, my God! It's all over the test!"
Seinfeld
"Thank you. Thank you so much. You're a very special person."
Seinfeld
"Babu whatever his name was. And Kramer. I couldn't concentrate."
Seinfeld
"- What's going on? - Hey, Kramer! I saw you go in there!"
Seinfeld
"There are no people!"
Seinfeld
"Anyway, it's been two years."
Seinfeld
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