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Clips from The Big Bang Theory - The Vengeance Formulation (S03E03)

"Yo, Raj, talk to me."
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"Said she hasn't heard from you. I thought you liked her."
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"I do, you know, but she wants a commitment..."
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"...and I'm not sure she's my type."
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"She agreed to go out with you for free. What more do you need?"
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"Look, Bernadette is really nice."
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"I just always thought when I finally settled down into a relationship..."
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"...it would be with someone, you know, different."
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"Well, you know, more like Megan Fox from Transformers..."
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"...or Katee Sackhoff from Battlestar Galactica."
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"Are you high?"
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"Okay, now you're just being unrealistic. Anyway, that movie was 20 years ago."
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"Imagine how saggy those things would be."
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"You're gonna throw away a great girl like Bernadette..."
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"Hey, just because you settled doesn't mean I have to."
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"Hey, I did not settle for Leonard."
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"I mean, obviously, he isn't the kind of guy I usually go out with."
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"Again, I'm right here."
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"Hey, I'm interested in what's inside people too."
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"But, you know, why is it wrong to want those insides wrapped up..."
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"...in, say, the delicious caramel that is Halle Berry?"
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"- Excuse me, may I interject? - What?"
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"...in seeking out the optimum mate for the propagation of his genetic line."
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"Thank you, Sheldon."
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"Whether that propagation is in the interest of humanity..."
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"...Is Dr. Sheldon Cooper."
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"Oh, this is gonna be a riot."
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"Thanks for being with us today, Dr. Cooper."
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"Can you explain to our audience just what a monopole Is?"
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"First, consider an ordinary magnet, which has, as even the most uneducated..."
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"...in your audience must know, two poles..."
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"...a north and south pole."
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"...each with its own north and south pole."
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"The primary characteristic of a monopole..."
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"...is that it has only one pole, hence, "monopole.""
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"A requirement for string theory, or M-theory, If you will..."
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"I myself led an expedition to the Arctic Circle In search of said particles."
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"Kripke, I found the nozzle. I'm going to kill you."
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"So nice you could join me this evening. You're looking lovely as always."
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"Always nice to be part of your masturbatory fantasies."
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"Come on, Katee, don't make it sound so cheap."
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"I'm sorry. Fiddling with yourself in the bathtub is a real class act."
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"Thank you."
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"Sure, but can I ask you a question first?"
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"- You mean Bernadette? - No, I mean Princess Leia."
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"- Really? Tall? - Six-four."
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"You've got a wonderful girl in your life, and you're ignoring her..."
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"What are you doing in there?"
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"I'm taking a bath!"
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"Oh, man."
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"All soaped up and no place to go."
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"How you doing, buddy?"
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"I was humiliated on national radio. How do you think I'm doing?"
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"Come on, it wasn't that bad."
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"We represent the Lollipop Guild, and we want you."
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"- Okay, so Kripke played a joke on you. - It wasn't funny."
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"Did you laugh?"
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"I fell on the floor."
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"All right, he got you. You can get him back."
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"- I refuse to sink to his level. - You can't sink."
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"- I don't think that's possible. - You're not helping."
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"I didn't come to help. I came to mock."
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"Sheldon, what you need to do..."
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"...is figure out a way to exact vengeance on Kripke, like..."
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"...for putting him in the Arkham Asylum for the Criminally Insane."
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"He didn't stay and talk about his feelings with the other villains."
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"He broke out and poisoned Gotham's water supply."
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"Well..."
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"- No, no. - It's a simple matter."
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"There are several toxic chemicals that would be untraceable in an autopsy."
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"Okay, that's the spirit..."
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"How about we put a whoopee cushion on his office chair?"
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"Let's keep thinking."
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"Scarlett Johansson and Wonder Woman were here..."
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"...trolling around for neurotic little weasels."
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"- I don't think she wants to see you. - Why not?"
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"Come on. You hurt her feelings by not calling her all week."
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"You asked me to think about where our relationship was going..."
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"Bernadette..."
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"Is this more comedy that I don't understand?"
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"No, I'm serious."
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"Then you're insane."
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"Howard, we've only been on three dates. We haven't even had sex yet."
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"Don't you just hate when this happens?"
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"Wow."
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"All right, how's this for revenge?"
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"Ah. Refreshing."
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"Now, we're going to combine these chemicals with ordinary dish soap..."
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"...creating a little exothermic release of oxygen."
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"- Foamy vengeance. - Yes, exactly."
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"This is a live shot of Kripke's lab via a mini webcam I was able to install..."
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"At the same time, I also secured large quantities of these chemicals..."
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"Sheldon, you remind me of a young Lex Luthor."
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"- Let me guess, motion sensors? - Yes."
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"This is truly the Sheldon Cooper way to get even."
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"...but I still maintain the whoopee cushion has comic validity."
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"Here comes Kripke."
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"I believe that's the president of the university."
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"- The board of directors. Abort! Abort! - There is no abort."
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"- How could you not put in an abort? - I made a boo-boo, all right?"
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"I think the board will really appreciate how well we're using that NSA grant."
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"Right here we have a micro-controlled plasma..."
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"This classic prank comes to you..."
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"...from the malevolent mind of Sheldon Cooper."
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"...this video is being Instantly uploaded to YouTube."
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"Oh, and a hat tip to Leonard Hofstadter and Raj Koothrappali..."
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"- You want me to throw him out? - No, that's okay."
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"I wanna dedicate this number to a great gal who I've done wrong."
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"Bernadette"
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"I am so sorry For trying to propose to you"
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"You found It creepy But that's just the kind of thing I do"
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"It was just a crazy idea That came to me In my tub"
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"Sweet Bernadette"
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"Sincerely yours, Howard Wolowitz"
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"Are you kidding?"
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"Thank you, Cheesecake Factory."
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"...who says, "What the heck was all that about?""
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"Call me when you figure it out."
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"Well, in romance, as in show business, always leave them wanting more."
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"Actually, I've never had three dates with the same woman."
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