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Clips from The Simpsons - Them, Robot (S23E23)

"Lenny's hit a new low!"
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"I don't want my window washed!"
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"Too late!"
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"I don't want my squeegee wiped!"
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"I got what I needed."
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"That's it, boy."
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"Live one more day."
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"Good morning, class."
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"I'm your substitute teacher..."
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"Fine. We will not be reading Death in Venice today."
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"Someone's in a mood."
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"Barney?"
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"it's that in a tough economy,"
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"ugly people strip for money."
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"No, but I can also play three-card full Monty."
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"Follow the hats, where's the wiener?"
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"Follow the hats, where's the wiener?"
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"Now you see it, now you don't."
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"So, Bart, the little dickens, is going through that phase"
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"where young boys think their dad's an idiot."
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"Sounds like you are having"
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"family difficulties."
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"That's exactly what I'm having!"
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"You guys totally get me."
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"We are programmed to respond to your verbal prompts."
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"Could you give my wife a few lessons?"
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"Hmm. Your laughter indicates"
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"you do not wish us to give your wife lessons."
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"Yeah."
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"So, uh, it's 5:00. Time for Moe's."
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"My watch says 3:00."
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"4:00... 5:00."
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"Let's go."
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"are not able to leave the plant."
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"What happened to you guys? You used to be cool."
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"We are the same temperature we have always been."
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""We're the same temperature we've always been.""
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"Our programming restricts our movement"
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"to yellow guidance lines."
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"Hmm..."
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"Play ball!"
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"all players get a turn "at bat.""
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"Uh, right, right."
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"Uh, actually, I'm the designated hitter"
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"for all you guys."
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"The designated hitter corrupts the purity"
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"of an otherwise elegant game..."
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"Illogical, illogical."
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"Fine. Don't get your circuits in a bunch."
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"Circuit-bunching has yielded important advances"
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"in modern robotics. To wit..."
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"Hey, Dad, can we play?"
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"We cannot take the inferior one."
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"My heart makes up for my shortcomings, like Rudy."
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"Rudy was only put in at the end of a meaningless game."
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"I got it!"
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"I said I've got it!"
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"That could've been my motherboard"
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"lying in the street!"
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"Our primary directive..."
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"is to preserve human life."
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"And here I was waiting till you slept"
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"to rob you of your copper."
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"You know, it's crazy but..."
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"Homer, move away from me."
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"You are still in the road."
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"Such a peaceful end."
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"Oh, geez!"
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"Get out of the road!"
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"Axles to axles,"
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"rust to rust, amen."
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"Amen. Amen."
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"Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, save your breath."
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"We have no breath."
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"We do vent nitrogen once a year."
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"You do not want to be around for that."
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"D'oh! I have some adjustments to make."
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"Homer..."
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"when am I getting my power drill back?"
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"When I'm done with my robo-botomies."
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"Primary directive deactivated."
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"becomes removing all impediments to the plant."
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"Uh, Homer, I'm afraid this is the part of God's perfect plan"
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"where you're murdered by robots."
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"by the color of their eyes, I look at their hands..."
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"which have turned into buzz saws."
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"Son of a...! Why did you do that?"
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"Eliminate impediment. Eliminate..."
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"Kill him. Kill him."
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"Dad, they can only go three miles an hour!"
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"I'm doomed! Can they climb stairs?"
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"With great difficulty."
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"I'm doomed!"
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"Robots... trying to kill me."
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"And now they'll kill you, 'cause I led them here!"
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"There's one thing man has that machines can never match:"
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"Hounds!"
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"it was a lie!"
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"No, stop! I'll give you the combination"
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"to the num-num safe!"
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"Flee, you fool!"
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"Aren't we getting num-nums?"
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"Ah. The solarium."
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"We'll be safely cornered in this glass room"
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"with one door."
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"Stop brandishing me."
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"Sorry. Before we die,"
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"can you tell me how old you really are?"
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"Well, it has four digits..."
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"Guys, thank you."
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"The words "prime directive""
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"but I'm glad yours was saving me."
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"If Mr. Burns had simply trusted"
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"Or if someone, anyone, had told me"
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"that robots were incapable of human feelings."
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"for the old-fashioned man of labor."
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"Homer, why have you reprogrammed me for this?"
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"I'm giving you your wish:"
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"To be a real boy."
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"I am real and I do not have wishes."
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