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Clips from 30 Rock - Mrs. Donaghy (S05E05)

"and that's take orders from anyone, ever."
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"I'm sorry, I'm not about to cancel my hair appointment"
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"You need to light some incense in here."
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"Okay, hang on. Who said you're my intern?"
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"It was Jack's idea. I have to start a career."
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"Okay, I see what this is. Jack's messing with me."
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"Excuse me, how is my being here messing with you?"
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"Do you have a problem with strong black women?"
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"No! Don't you see? That's the kind of exchange Jack wants."
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"make copies and run errands."
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"So I'm like your servant?"
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"No, because you're not being paid."
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"Oh, boy."
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"Look, Angie, you don't want to be an intern."
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"And I don't really have time to mentor someone right now,"
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"so I don't think this is a good idea."
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"I don't understand."
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"That white girl just fired you!"
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"Come on, D'Fwan! Be a buddy!"
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"Nothing. Love you."
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"Look, I made this picture of us!"
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"Did you draw that?"
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"You might need help. That's awful for an adult."
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"Well, I think it's great, Kenneth. You should hang it on the wall."
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"Careful!"
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"Oh, my bones!"
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"with Jeffrey Weinerslav tomorrow morning?"
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"And some of your plan worked."
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"and, yes, I mentioned slavery by mistake."
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"I knew I could count on you."
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"But you also made me her boss. So I fired her."
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"She chased me around for a while, so I hid in a closet down on News."
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"But then Subhas and Ann Curry came in, just going to town on..."
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"Is this a game for you two?"
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"and you know what Angie Jordan does with the trash?"
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"- Angie, I did not... - I will rip your weave out!"
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"It's not a weave!"
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"Oh, good God. Angie, no!"
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"I should never have made you an intern."
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"- You're a star. - That's right, I am."
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"hair-pullingness, delusions of grandeur,"
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"I should give you your own reality show."
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"Friday nights..."
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"11:00."
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"What? That is when 'TGS' or wrestling is on."
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"in exchange for your signature."
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"You know what? I'm calling your bluff."
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"and a crazy-eyed, divorced white lady"
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"who wants to be in the music business."
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"Mm-hmm, with his even gayer boyfriend."
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"Okay, fine, give her her own show, and I will watch it"
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"Do you think my meth-addict nephew should be on the show?"
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"Pete, you and Paula fight a lot."
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"No, I walked into a door! I'm so clumsy!"
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"Jack is using 'TGS' as leverage in our divorce."
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"He says he's gonna replace us with a reality show about Angie."
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"Oh, I'd watch that."
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"I agreed to go to a furniture store"
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"Then you got to hit 'em where it hurts."
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"Find their weakness, and viciously exploit it."
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"That's what marriage is."
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"Don't even get me started on marriage!"
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"Well, sport, I'm gonna be moving out."
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"I don't understand."
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"Oh, no, I get that."
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"What I don't get is this is Danny's dressing room."
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"I'm gonna be staying at the Y."
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"that's shaped like a wishbone."
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"But you're my Danny and Jenna."
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"And we'll always be Danny and Jenna."
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"Know that it means that."
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"She what?"
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"High School for Teen Drama, the Arts, and Feelings."
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"As embarrassed Americans, Jack and I"
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"pledge $5 million to create"
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"a new generation of choreographers and puppeteers,"
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""cloons", video artists, and theatrical jugglers"
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"Good morning! How is the happy couple today?"
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"and it's been a real hoot to watch your courtship."
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"Okeydokey."
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"Now, when two employees get married, it is my job"
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"to make sure that the employee is not receiving favoritism"
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"Favoritism? Really? He's trying to cancel my show!"
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"Uh-huh. And what about your little announcement last night?"
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"Do you know how many fires I had to put out this morning"
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"of that crazy lady!"
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"Let's keep this meeting short."
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"Also, in order for there to be favoritism,"
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"we'd have to actually still be friends."
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"All righty, let's just dive on in!"
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"an inordinate amount of time in the employer's office"
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"compared to other employees?""
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"Well, yes, I suppose, but only because Miss Lemon"
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"is incapable of doing anything on her own."
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"Please. Half the time when I go up there,"
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"it's to help you choose a tie, and they're all red or blue!"
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"Where I come from, if you have more than two colors on a tie,"
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""Are all workday conversations business-related,"
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"including, but not limited to, mothers,"
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"Okay, yes, in the past, we have advised each other."
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"For instance, Jack taught me not to wear tan slacks with a tan turtleneck."
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"I thought it looked nice, but he rightly"
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"pointed out that it made me look like a giant condom."
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"who's not afraid to warn me when I'm being too authoritative"
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"Or when you have eye boogers."
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"such as class reunions,"
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"birthday or holiday celebrations, weddings, or extended car trips?"
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"Are you each others' emergency contacts?"
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"and perhaps most meaningful relationship in your life?"
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"Do you often find yourselves thinking the same thing"
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"and then saying it at the exact same time?""
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"- I'm sorry, Jack. - I apologize, Lemon."
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"I'll sign the papers."
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"And I shouldn't have threatened your show."
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"I'll leave that to the parental-decency groups."
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"Okay!"
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""Foreplay.""
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"We're done, Weinerslav."
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"Your fly's open, Jack."
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"a sexual maniac!"
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