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Clips from Family Guy - Running Mates (S02E02)

"Maybe something about education?"
Family Guy
"I have aIways cared deepIy about young peopIe,"
Family Guy
"As a rich coIIege-bound student, I once joined some underpriviIeged youths..."
Family Guy
"...in saving a community center from being converted into a shopping maII,"
Family Guy
"You watched it Iast night,"
Family Guy
"I'm gonna take the highroad and stick to the issues,"
Family Guy
"They deserve a schooI board president who doesn't Ieave their feminine ointments..."
Family Guy
"...in the fridge next to the mustard! That was the worst hot dog I ever ate!"
Family Guy
"Yeah, she fIosses in bed, she snores Iike a wiIdebeest--"
Family Guy
"Wait a second, bIow dryer, I'm not done yet,"
Family Guy
"She freed WiIIie Horton, naiIed Donna Rice--"
Family Guy
"- Peter, that's enough! - Eats babies,"
Family Guy
"Peter, Peter. Just a minute, Listen to me, pIease!"
Family Guy
"This eIection is about our chiIdren's future,"
Family Guy
"So ask yourseIf..."
Family Guy
"...what kind of future wiII it be if you eIect a man who has never taught a student..."
Family Guy
"...or even been to a PTA meeting,"
Family Guy
"This is a man who beIieves the pIuraI of "goose" is "sheep"!"
Family Guy
"I'm the right person for the job, Vote for me,"
Family Guy
"Wait, I'm not done,"
Family Guy
"Peter! Come on! Stop, Shut up! You guys shut up!"
Family Guy
"That's okay, Lois. l enjoyed it."
Family Guy
"Lois Griffin is a sIut, What?"
Family Guy
"Hi, I'm Peter Griffin,"
Family Guy
"I grew up in this town,"
Family Guy
"Quahog needs a moraI, upstanding schooI board president,"
Family Guy
"Someone we can trust,"
Family Guy
"But pictures are better than words..."
Family Guy
"...because some words are big and hard to understand,"
Family Guy
"But here's something everyone can understand!"
Family Guy
"Do you reaIIy want your chiIdren's future in the hands of this?"
Family Guy
"Paid for by the Peter Griffin for SchooI Board President Committee,"
Family Guy
"Sorry, Lois,"
Family Guy
""Lewd," "obscene," and "a little blurry"..."
Family Guy
"...just some of the words used to describe Lois Griffin's prurient pic."
Family Guy
"Yesterday, voters overwhelmingly declared..."
Family Guy
"...that Lois Griffin is not the kind of person they want running their schools."
Family Guy
"Her husband, Peter Griffin, was elected by a landslide."
Family Guy
"What a great day! I just want to say...,"
Family Guy
"I am so freaking wasted!"
Family Guy
"SpIendid, How deIightfuI to have mother back,"
Family Guy
"They can't believe l came out of you!"
Family Guy
"Lois, l got a joke for you. How many losers does it take to make me breakfast?"
Family Guy
"Just one! You!"
Family Guy
"l'm just kidding. French toast, please."
Family Guy
"And for what? To get that crazy Mr. Fargas back in the classroom?"
Family Guy
"Who?"
Family Guy
"Peter, l cared about our schools."
Family Guy
"All you cared about was some stupid competition."
Family Guy
"Winning was only half the battle."
Family Guy
"lf you blow this chance to do something good for our kids..."
Family Guy
"...you'll be the biggest loser!"
Family Guy
"Oh, yeah?"
Family Guy
"Peter Griffin is no loser! When l'm through with our schools..."
Family Guy
"...our students'll be so smart they'll be able to program their VCRs..."
Family Guy
"...without spilling piping hot gravy all over myself."
Family Guy
"This is Trisha Takanawa, here with School Board President Peter Griffin."
Family Guy
"Mr. President, you've accomplished so much in just a few short weeks."
Family Guy
"Thanks, Connie. l'm very excited about our progress in revamping our schools."
Family Guy
"For starters, we're making sex education more fun."
Family Guy
""Vagina junction, what's your function?"
Family Guy
""Taking in sperm and spitting out babies""
Family Guy
"And our schools are the safest around..."
Family Guy
"...thanks to the hall monitor XL-K. HaIt! Present haII pass!"
Family Guy
"Right here. Second request, Present pass,"
Family Guy
"But.... Right here! Security breach!"
Family Guy
"l guess Little Miss Free Spirit will think twice before roaming the halls."
Family Guy
"l've restocked our school library..."
Family Guy
"...with books of some of our greatest movies and TV shows."
Family Guy
"Because if we don't teach our kids to read, how will they ever know what's on?"
Family Guy
"Mr. Griffin, this is impressive."
Family Guy
"l've never seen kids so enthusiastic about reading."
Family Guy
"Thank you. That's what you voted for."
Family Guy
"Hey, son, show the folks at home what you got there."
Family Guy
"Good Lord! That's a dirty magazine!"
Family Guy
"There might be a mineshaft under this library."
Family Guy
"All these kids are looking at pornography!"
Family Guy
"What kind of pervert gave you kids this filth?"
Family Guy
"There's quite a crowd outside."
Family Guy
"l haven't witnessed pandemonium like this since Ridiculous Day down at the deli..."
Family Guy
"...when prices were so low they were ridiculous."
Family Guy
"You said it, pally. That's why l brought in the big guns."
Family Guy
"Say "how do" to the Ragin' Cajun, Mr. James Carville."
Family Guy
"Oh, God. Oh, jeez!"
Family Guy
"Did somebody open the Ark of the Covenant?"
Family Guy
"Now see, Peter, what you gotta do is you gotta declare war! War!"
Family Guy
"Your only chance of surviving this scandal..."
Family Guy
"...is to claim that Lois gave your boy the pornography."
Family Guy
"And he's right. Pin it on the old ball and chain."
Family Guy
"l can't do that. Lois is mad enough at me without...."
Family Guy
"l'm sorry. l can't look at you!"
Family Guy
"Lois, l need your help. You gotta come to my press conference this afternoon."
Family Guy
"Lois, l could lose my presidency!"
Family Guy
"Not my rainbow socks with the individual toes?"
Family Guy
"Because l need those socks."
Family Guy
"We now take you live to Peter Griffin Junior High..."
Family Guy
"...where embattled School Board President Peter Griffin is fighting for his political life."
Family Guy
"Throw the bum out!"
Family Guy
"Mom, what are you doing here? l thought you were mad at Dad."
Family Guy
"Are you and Dad gonna get a divorce?"
Family Guy
""A parent giving porno to their kid is a terribIe thing..."
Family Guy
""...but I'm here to teII you that I'm innocent! ""
Family Guy
""I didn't give those magazines to my son,"
Family Guy
""My wife, Lois..., ""
Family Guy
"Lois!"
Family Guy
"Crap, Look, my wife, Lois, is the most important person in the worId to me,"
Family Guy
"I gave my son those magazines,"
Family Guy
"Even worse, I turned a beautifuI gift from Lois into something cheap and tawdry,"
Family Guy
"Now I know that some things are more important than winning,"
Family Guy
"Lois, I onIy hope you can find it in your heart to forgive me,"
Family Guy
"Oh, Peter!"
Family Guy
"So you're saying you're not only a bad father, but a bad husband, too?"
Family Guy
"Have you the moral authority to lead?"
Family Guy
"Yes. No. And, screw it. l resign."
Family Guy
"There's the President, First Lady Lois,"
Family Guy
"Now boarding the heIicopter,"
Family Guy
"And so ends a dark and shameful chapter in the history of Quahog, Rhode lsland."
Family Guy
"One which leaves this reporter asking:"
Family Guy
"How much moral bankruptcy and perversion must we, the people, endure?"
Family Guy
"Next up, stay tuned for our special investigative report..."
Family Guy
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