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Clips from Community (2009) - Basic Lupine Urology (S03E03)

I got there too late, the doors were already locked.

"I got there too late, the doors were already locked."

Community (2009)

Why were you late?

"Why were you late?"

Community (2009)

I... fell asleep in a sunbeam.

"I... fell asleep in a sunbeam."

Community (2009)

- Likely story. - Actually it is.

"- Likely story. - Actually it is."

Community (2009)

I used to live with him, it's kind of adorable.

"I used to live with him, it's kind of adorable."

Community (2009)

Look, why are you looking at me for this?

"Look, why are you looking at me for this?"

Community (2009)

It was my yam too.

"It was my yam too."

Community (2009)

who would wanna hurt us.

"who would wanna hurt us."

Community (2009)

- And who's that? - Duh-doy!

"- And who's that? - Duh-doy!"

Community (2009)

Todd.

"Todd."

Community (2009)

Last night, I was home by 9:15,

"Last night, I was home by 9:15,"

Community (2009)

helped Elly with her geography and then went straight to bed.

"helped Elly with her geography and then went straight to bed."

Community (2009)

Sounds like you keep a pretty tight schedule.

"Sounds like you keep a pretty tight schedule."

Community (2009)

A valuable side effect of military service.

"A valuable side effect of military service."

Community (2009)

In Iraq, keeping a tight schedule saved lives.

"In Iraq, keeping a tight schedule saved lives."

Community (2009)

Ah, what happened, Todd?

"Ah, what happened, Todd?"

Community (2009)

Cut yourself on an extra sharp Oscar Wilde play?

"Cut yourself on an extra sharp Oscar Wilde play?"

Community (2009)

Oh, this? It's a burn.

"Oh, this? It's a burn."

Community (2009)

Home ec class. Muffin.

"Home ec class. Muffin."

Community (2009)

What kind of muffin?

"What kind of muffin?"

Community (2009)

That wasn't the assignment.

"That wasn't the assignment."

Community (2009)

You can dance all day, Todd,

"You can dance all day, Todd,"

Community (2009)

but sooner or later, the music's gonna change.

"but sooner or later, the music's gonna change."

Community (2009)

Look, even if I wanted to hurt your yam, I couldn't.

"Look, even if I wanted to hurt your yam, I couldn't."

Community (2009)

I went by the bio room at 8:10 to chart my yam's growth.

"I went by the bio room at 8:10 to chart my yam's growth."

Community (2009)

The door was already locked.

"The door was already locked."

Community (2009)

There's a lot of that going around.

"There's a lot of that going around."

Community (2009)

- Oh, yeah. - It's true.

"- Oh, yeah. - It's true."

Community (2009)

I had to take a picture of my yam through the door.

"I had to take a picture of my yam through the door."

Community (2009)

See?

"See?"

Community (2009)

Your yam was fine when I left.

"Your yam was fine when I left."

Community (2009)

I transferred or "downloaded"

"I transferred or "downloaded""

Community (2009)

Todd's photograph to this computer

"Todd's photograph to this computer"

Community (2009)

and as you'll see, with a few adjustments, I can make

"and as you'll see, with a few adjustments, I can make"

Community (2009)

the entire image...

"the entire image..."

Community (2009)

old west color.

"old west color."

Community (2009)

I don't know. I thought it was cool.

"I don't know. I thought it was cool."

Community (2009)

There's a clock on the wall.

"There's a clock on the wall."

Community (2009)

- Eight plus two times five... - Ten after 8:00.

"- Eight plus two times five... - Ten after 8:00."

Community (2009)

I'm gifted in other ways.

"I'm gifted in other ways."

Community (2009)

That jibes with everyone else we talked to.

"That jibes with everyone else we talked to."

Community (2009)

It seems like the classroom door gets locked at 8:00.

"It seems like the classroom door gets locked at 8:00."

Community (2009)

Which means whoever did the crime...

"Which means whoever did the crime..."

Community (2009)

Got in there before the doors were locked

"Got in there before the doors were locked"

Community (2009)

I was gonna say, "Had a key".

"I was gonna say, "Had a key"."

Community (2009)

Last year, I came in after hours a couple of times

"Last year, I came in after hours a couple of times"

Community (2009)

to finish a piñata for advanced Spanish.

"to finish a piñata for advanced Spanish."

Community (2009)

I had to borrow a key from the front office.

"I had to borrow a key from the front office."

Community (2009)

I can also help.

"I can also help."

Community (2009)

As a psych major, I could pr...

"As a psych major, I could pr..."

Community (2009)

Any student can check out a key as long as they're

"Any student can check out a key as long as they're"

Community (2009)

currently taking classes and show school I.D.

"currently taking classes and show school I.D."

Community (2009)

The guy we're looking for had a key

"The guy we're looking for had a key"

Community (2009)

to the bio room Monday night.

"to the bio room Monday night."

Community (2009)

Monday night? Rings a bell.

"Monday night? Rings a bell."

Community (2009)

I'll check the log.

"I'll check the log."

Community (2009)

Is this about your yam?

"Is this about your yam?"

Community (2009)

I heard about that. It's a damn shame.

"I heard about that. It's a damn shame."

Community (2009)

- Mine just bloomed yesterday. - Congratulations.

"- Mine just bloomed yesterday. - Congratulations."

Community (2009)

Ooh, there she is.

"Ooh, there she is."

Community (2009)

So you're saying you did check out a key,

"So you're saying you did check out a key,"

Community (2009)

but it was inside your backpack when someone stole it

"but it was inside your backpack when someone stole it"

Community (2009)

Pop pop!

"Pop pop!"

Community (2009)

Well, whoever did it likes to steal backpacks

"Well, whoever did it likes to steal backpacks"

Community (2009)

off tables in the library.

"off tables in the library."

Community (2009)

Only one way to catch a dirtbag like that.

"Only one way to catch a dirtbag like that."

Community (2009)

Well, time to visit the restroom.

"Well, time to visit the restroom."

Community (2009)

Hey, idiot, guess what.

"Hey, idiot, guess what."

Community (2009)

We don't care about the backpack.

"We don't care about the backpack."

Community (2009)

Dead yam, big deal.

"Dead yam, big deal."

Community (2009)

Order some ketchup.

"Order some ketchup."

Community (2009)

That doesn't make sense. You don't order ketchup.

"That doesn't make sense. You don't order ketchup."

Community (2009)

It's a condiment!

"It's a condiment!"

Community (2009)

Troy, Troy, hey, walk it off!

"Troy, Troy, hey, walk it off!"

Community (2009)

Troy, walk it off!

"Troy, walk it off!"

Community (2009)

Sorry, my friend, he's a bad cop.

"Sorry, my friend, he's a bad cop."

Community (2009)

- Yeah. - I'm a good cop.

"- Yeah. - I'm a good cop."

Community (2009)

- Oh, good. - You can trust me.

"- Oh, good. - You can trust me."

Community (2009)

And I don't have to stay here, 'cause you're not cops.

"And I don't have to stay here, 'cause you're not cops."

Community (2009)

He's right. You're not cops.

"He's right. You're not cops."

Community (2009)

I'd say our hands are tied, but we basically have no hands.

"I'd say our hands are tied, but we basically have no hands."

Community (2009)

But he's our man though, right?

"But he's our man though, right?"

Community (2009)

Well he ain't innocent.

"Well he ain't innocent."

Community (2009)

You guys go to the lab, see if they figured out

"You guys go to the lab, see if they figured out"

Community (2009)

I can both see and hear you.

"I can both see and hear you."

Community (2009)

The yam's vascular cylinder is completely disintegrated.

"The yam's vascular cylinder is completely disintegrated."

Community (2009)

Any possibility it happened naturally?

"Any possibility it happened naturally?"

Community (2009)

Sure, if the gardener's Joseph Mengele.

"Sure, if the gardener's Joseph Mengele."

Community (2009)

Look at the root system.

"Look at the root system."

Community (2009)

This level of smushing is consistent

"This level of smushing is consistent"

Community (2009)

with someone stepping on the yam after it was dropped.

"with someone stepping on the yam after it was dropped."

Community (2009)

So whoever did this was angry.

"So whoever did this was angry."

Community (2009)

Hey, I just cut 'em open.

"Hey, I just cut 'em open."

Community (2009)

You want motive, talk to a shrink.

"You want motive, talk to a shrink."

Community (2009)

What I can tell you is that for a raw yam to get it this bad,

"What I can tell you is that for a raw yam to get it this bad,"

Community (2009)

you need more than gravity.

"you need more than gravity."

Community (2009)

You need a boot.

"You need a boot."

Community (2009)

We have to tell Professor Kane.

"We have to tell Professor Kane."

Community (2009)

There's nothing here to connect to Star-Burns.

"There's nothing here to connect to Star-Burns."

Community (2009)

Oh, yeah, sure.

"Oh, yeah, sure."

Community (2009)

Maybe if we ask him nice,

"Maybe if we ask him nice,"

Community (2009)

he'll write us a love letter too.

"he'll write us a love letter too."

Community (2009)

Well, whoever did do this does owe you guys a letter.

"Well, whoever did do this does owe you guys a letter."

Community (2009)

An "A."

"An "A.""

Community (2009)

This yam was about to bloom.

"This yam was about to bloom."

Community (2009)

Damn.

"Damn."

Community (2009)

We named the yam "Pam."

"We named the yam "Pam.""

Community (2009)

It rhymed.

"It rhymed."

Community (2009)

Even if we could prove

"Even if we could prove"

Community (2009)

that Star-Burns stole Magnitude's key,

"that Star-Burns stole Magnitude's key,"

Community (2009)

it's not enough.

"it's not enough."

Community (2009)

Keep the change, Garret.

"Keep the change, Garret."

Community (2009)

You know what? Keep the hot dog.

"You know what? Keep the hot dog."

Community (2009)

You're telling me after all this,

"You're telling me after all this,"

Community (2009)

our suspect's gonna slip away

"our suspect's gonna slip away"

Community (2009)

on the technicality that we're not police?

"on the technicality that we're not police?"

Community (2009)

Okay, look, you don't need authority

"Okay, look, you don't need authority"

Community (2009)

to get a confession.

"to get a confession."

Community (2009)

You need leverage. Something to hold over his head.

"You need leverage. Something to hold over his head."

Community (2009)

- Like what? - He's Star-Burns.

"- Like what? - He's Star-Burns."

Community (2009)

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