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Clips from Riverdale (2017) - Chapter Seventy-Four: Wicked Little Town (S04E04)

"And, I think you're an amazing writer, Jug,"
Riverdale (2017)
"phoned in. I mean there's typos"
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"and incomplete sentences and I'm not even sure what the thesis is."
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"[sighs]"
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"Yeah. Okay."
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"Maybe, I'll go offline."
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"Hole myself up in the bunker after school and really focus on it."
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"Play Thomas Pynchon for a while."
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"[bell ringing]"
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"[Veronica] Oh, he comes bearing gifts."
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"I signed us up for the variety show."
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"-To perform as a band. -Well, obviously, I'm completely in."
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"You know I support you kids in your rock-and-roll,"
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"or else my girlfriend over there is gonna lock me in the stocks."
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"It's true, Jug has a lot of work to do."
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"But I think, you can take a little time out, for this."
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"I mean, look, it's senior year,"
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"we promised we were gonna start taking advantage of that."
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"Agreed."
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"-Does this band have a name? -Mmm."
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"Uh, it's The Archies."
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"What, was the Me-Me-Me's taken?"
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"-I like it. -[Kevin over speaker] What's up, Riverdale?"
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"Are you trying to tear me down?"
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"That's, wait. That's not..."
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"Well, sorry, I'm the new Berlin Wall, baby."
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"Now, get your asses to the music room."
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"[music plays]"
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"♪ Enemies and adversaries"
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"♪ They try and tear me down"
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"♪ There ain't much Of a difference ♪"
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"♪ Whoa, you would be Nothing at all ♪"
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"♪ You want me, baby I dare you ♪"
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"You're done, Mr. Keller, you're off the variety show."
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"♪ Come on and tear me"
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"I said, "you're done." You hear me?"
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"You're done!"
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"-[Betty] Okay, I'm gonna try it. -[Veronica laughing]"
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"-[all] Whoa. -Okay."
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"-Can we please order pizza from Little Cicero's? -Ugh!"
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"Guys, it is not a sleepover without greasy pizza, right, Kev?"
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"Kev?"
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"Sorry, it's just..."
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"Working on the variety show made me feel like,"
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"I was reconnecting with the old, pre-farm Kevin."
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"Mr. Honey didn't just take that away, he made me feel like I was nothing."
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"Like I didn't matter."
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"[sighs]"
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"You know something that makes me feel better?"
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"♪ On nights"
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"♪ Like this"
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"♪ When the world's A bit amiss ♪"
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"♪ And the lights go down"
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"♪ I put on some make-up"
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"Oh."
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"I hear what you're saying, Betty,"
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"but I'm not sure even a makeover montage will help."
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"♪ Look at the woman I've become ♪"
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"♪ And the strangest thing's"
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"♪ Suddenly routine"
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"♪ I look up from my Vermouth On the rocks ♪"
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"♪ And pull the wig down From the shelf ♪"
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"-[vocalizing] -♪ Suddenly I'm Miss Beehive 1963 ♪"
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"♪ Some girls They have natural ease ♪"
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"♪ They wear it any way They please ♪"
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"♪ With their French flip curls And perfumed magazines ♪"
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"♪ Wear it up, let it down"
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"♪ To be the best You've ever seen ♪"
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"♪ It's all because of you It's all because of you ♪"
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"Oh, my..."
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"-[sighs] -[laughs]"
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"-Hey, Kev? -Yeah."
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"we all performed songs from Hedwig."
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"Yeah. As a sign of solidarity."
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"And as President of the Student Body"
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"and Riverdale High's LGBTQIA Alliance,"
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"I promise you, I will sit down with Principal Humbug and make this right."
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"[soft music playing]"
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"On behalf of Kevin Keller and the entire Student Body"
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"we urge you to hear our plea."
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"Hedwigis not some fringe, down-beat musical."
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"It's fun. It's an old-fashioned, red-blooded,"
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"American musical comedy with something for everyone."
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"Including those of us, who are more... straight-laced."
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"Allow us to demonstrate."
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"♪ I'll lay out fine china On the linen"
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"♪ Sugar daddy bring it home"
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"♪ You're my cherry blossom Honey bear ♪"
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"♪ Bring me Versace blue jeans ♪"
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"♪ Black designer underwear"
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"♪ If you got some Sugar for me ♪"
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"♪ Oh, the thrill of control"
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"♪ Like the Blitzkrieg On the roll ♪"
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"♪ It's the sweetest taste I've known, oh yeah ♪"
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"What? No applause?"
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"[scoffs] How queer-phobic of you."
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"And if every student of Riverdale High changed their variety show act"
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"to a number from Hedwig, what would you do then?"
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"Hmm. Well, Ms. Topaz,"
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""Any student who performs a song from Hedwigwill be barred from Senior Prom.""
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"Now..."
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"As you like to say, Ms. Blossom..."
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"[phone continues buzzing]"
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"[Archie] So what happened exactly?"
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"Daddy is downplaying it."
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"He says he missed a step and stumbled."
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"But, it's still scary and confusing."
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"He's been going to the doctor, he just told us."
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"He was getting better."
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"Ronnie, I don't want you to worry."
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"[sighs] But your dad's been working out at the gym."
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"He was bench pressing and the bar slipped."
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"Luckily, I was there to catch it, but..."
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"I don't think, he's been going to the doctor as regularly as he says."
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"And,"
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"you haven't told me this before, why?"
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"Well, he said it was nothing, and when Iron Lodge asks you to shut your mouth"
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"and mind your own business, you mind your own business."
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"No, no, you drag him to the car,"
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"and you drive him to the doctor yourself."
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