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Clips from South Park - A Boy and a Priest (S22E22)

"Father!"
South Park
"Father, where'd you go?"
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"There you are! I been lookin' everywhere."
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"But you're missin' the party."
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"They just don't understand you like I do."
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"Because I knew! All right?!"
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"Years ago,"
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"that the problem was worse than anyone even thought."
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"I thought I could help fix it, so I kept my mouth shut."
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"I thought there was a cancer in the Church"
South Park
"that we could get rid of."
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"But the Church is the cancer."
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"There's only a few good apples,"
South Park
"and I'm clearly not one of them."
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"You thought wrong."
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"[ Brakes creak ]"
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"Hey, there."
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"What's the matter, my child?"
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"Sometimes I wonder."
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"I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me.""
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"You like camping trips? You wanna go camping?"
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"No."
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"I got a bunny in the back. You wanna see the bunny?"
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"Well, okay!"
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"Dumb."
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"Stupid."
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"Good, but dated in its view of gender norms."
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"[ Doorbell rings ]"
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"Hello, Mr. Marsh."
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"Father!"
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"Hey, Sharon, it's Father!"
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"-Mr. Marsh, please -- -He's back!"
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"Father's back!"
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"I'm just going around"
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"I thought he might be here"
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"playing a board game with your son?"
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"But, Father, please, we all need church."
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"I'm sorry, but I have to keep looking."
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"I said some terrible things."
South Park
"and the clean-up crew hasn't helped at all."
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"♪♪"
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"[ Crickets chirping, owl hoots ]"
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"[ Fire crackles ]"
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"All right. When the priest gets here,"
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"[ Engine blooping ]"
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"Taken by priests?"
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"[ Laughs ] Okay. O-Okay, that was good."
South Park
"But where would priests go this late at night?"
South Park
"To a midnight sale at Boys-R-Us?"
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"Wha-- What'd she say?"
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"Give me that!"
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"Mr. Stotch, have you heard from Butters at all?"
South Park
"Well, yeah, we got a really weird text from him"
South Park
"saying not to worry, he needed to do some camping."
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"Oh, my Lord. I know where to go."
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"And when we get there..."
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"I'll need to go in alone."
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"[ Boy's voice ] I love Jesus!"
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"I love Jesus!"
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"Yes, Your Holiness."
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"Priest Maxi: Wait!"
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"I know why you're here."
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"What?! No!"
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"and set up this trap to kill you?"
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"We're Catholics."
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"A full transfer to the beautiful Maldive Islands!"
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""Thank you for cleaning up all my cum.""
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"I can start over in the Maldives?"
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"No one will make fun of you there."
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"They can't even speak English."
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"to take your place here."
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"you know what you have to do."
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"I don't think I have any other choice."
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"Well, our work here is done!"
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"Aah!"
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"[ Breathing heavily ]"
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"[ Engine stops, brakes hiss ]"
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"Does that mean you're gonna stay?"
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"Of course."
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"Now I have purpose, and I have meaning."
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"My job here is to protect you."
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"All of you."
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"Today, I'd like to talk on the subject of penance."
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"[ Snickering ]"
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"And in choir boys' butts and asses."
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"[ Laughter ]"
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"So we are not to punish ourselves,"
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"but instead we are to make ourselves passionate."
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"Like a Catholic priest at a Chuck E. Cheese."
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"[ Laughter ]"
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"Woman: How hard what truly was?"
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"[ Laughter ]"
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"Salvation in a little boy's mouth."
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"I'm gonna post that one for sure."
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"Who said the thing about naked boy salad?"
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"Oh, that was Linda!"
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"-Yeah! See ya! -All right. Take it easy, now!"
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"-Bye. -That was good."
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"♪♪"
South Park
"♪ Friendly faces everywhere ♪"
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"Les: ♪ I'm goin' down to South Park, gonna leave my woes behind ♪"
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"♪ Ample parking day or night ♪"
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"Les: ♪ Headin' on up to South Park, gonna see if I can't unwind ♪"
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"♪ Murpph mmmph mmph mmmph mrrr mff mrmmph! ♪"
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"Les: ♪ Come on down to South Park, and meet some friends of mine ♪"
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"Do I have to go? It's the only day I get to play games."
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"Les: ♪ I'm goin' down to South Park ♪"
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"Come on, guys. We don't wanna be late."
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"[ Indistinct conversations ]"
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"so that whoever believed in him should have eternal life."
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"Well, see ya next week, everybody!"
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"when I was a kid, too."
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"How many cards do you start with, Kenny?"
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"well, fuck 'em!"
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"[ Grunts ]"
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"Isn't this great, Father?"
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"In wisdom, you made them all."
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"He is..."
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"because he brought me you."
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"♪♪"
South Park
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