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Clips from The Simpsons - Bobby, It's Cold Outside (S31E31)

"If you don't hear from me in one hour, call the police."
The Simpsons
"I have my own problems, Bart."
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"My mom just locked my dad out in the snow."
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"She said if I open it, no presents."
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"Life goals?!"
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"Don't pooh-pooh."
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"Now for God's sake, how can I convince you"
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"that I am not going to kill you?!"
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"Find the person who stole the presents."
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"Very well. I shall begin by clearing my initials,"
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"catching the true "S.B." and, if I must,"
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"save Christmas for everyone."
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"Now let me drive you home."
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"You want me to ride with you? Fine."
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"Shotgun!"
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"Shotgun means you pay the tolls."
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"So I'm here to save Christmas, and here's my plan."
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"First, I conceal myself within this box."
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"(all gasp)"
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"Where'd you learn how to do that?"
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"When you ride cross-country in a clown car, you learn a lot."
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"(shuddering laugh)"
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"-(applause, cheering) -HOMER: Who knew?"
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"SIDESHOW BOB: Thank you."
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"Now, Homer, gently place me on the porch,"
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"and when they steal me, follow them to their lair."
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"(both grunting)"
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"(grunting continues)"
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"Ah!"
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"-And... (grunts) -Ah!"
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"Godspeed."
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"¶ ¶"
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"(bells jingling)"
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"(straining): Can't breathe."
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"ALL: ¶ Baby shark, doo-doo-doo-doo-doo-doo ¶"
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"(gasps) Oh, my God, S.B. is"
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"Also, leg cramp."
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"Ow."
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"Who will they believe? You or the billionaire"
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"who just sent them a Montgomery Ward's cheese log?"
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"Ooh, general Scroogeyness."
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"No, it's deeper. It's much deeper than that."
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"(gasps) I think Mr. Burns is depressed."
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"Ooh, you're a very perceptive girl."
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"(melancholy piano music plays)"
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"-That's close enough. -(music stops)"
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"I just wanted everyone to experience"
The Simpsons
"the same Christmas heartbreak that I once did."
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"¶ Good King Wenceslas looked out ¶"
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"Well, I don't know."
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"Santa Claus, giving away free toys,"
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"undercutting my friends, Bill Mattel and Fred Hasbro."
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"Please?"
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"Well, what's on your wish list, little boy?"
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"A Rockford sock monkey, Studebaker pedal car,"
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"or the most popular gift this year, an orange."
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"All I want is a hug from my mommy"
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"and a smile from my daddy."
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"Oh, well I'm sure there's a hug and a smile"
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"on their way to you right now. Ho, ho, ho."
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"Next."
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"What do you want for Christmas?"
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"I want you to marry my mom like you said you would."
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"Next!"
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"I'm here to take you to boarding school."
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"-On Christmas Day? -Hey, no traffic."
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"You two never gave me anything except $100 million."
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"Santa lied."
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"But, Monty, you misunderstood me."
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"Ho, ho, ho."
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"Monty, it's 1935,"
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"and this is Gimbels Department Store,"
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"and Maxie the elevator man."
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"(laughs)"
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"And the truth is, your parents did love you,"
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"not with hugs and kisses, but with something better--"
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"they made you strong."
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"Where are all the other tycoons from your day?"
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"Broke, dead, a lot of #MeToo."
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"But you're the richest, most ruthless man in town,"
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"thanks to your parents' love."
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"which is a work day for you, so help me out."
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"-And it's my birthday. -Don't expect two presents."
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"-¶ Christmas ¶ -¶ The snow's coming down ¶"
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"-¶ Christmas ¶ -¶ I'm watching it fall ¶"
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"¶ Christmas... ¶"
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"My raisins came!"
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"-Mmm! -(sighs)"
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"God bless us, every one."
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"Seriously, this is, this is really nice."
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"("Carol of the Bells" playing)"
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"(yawns) We did it."
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"All I want is one peaceful moment"
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"to hold my wife in my arms."
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"BART: It's Christmas!"
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"Awake already?"
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"-(chuckles) Slide whistle. -Kazoo!"
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"(quietly): Meet me in the basement."
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"Picture time."
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"Janey, haven't you learned that silly tune yet?"
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"You play it over and over again. Now stop it, stop it!"
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"That girl is pretty bad at the piano."
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"(knock on door)"
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"Ugh. Hello, Cassandra."
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"I brought you a Christmas present."
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"(grumbling)"
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"I know who you are, and I know what you've done,"
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"-¶ I can't have you here ¶ -¶ Just get me a beer ¶"
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"-¶ I'm being a gent ¶ -¶ I'm giving consent ¶"
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"¶ You are quite inviting ¶"
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"¶ I will put it in writing ¶"
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"BOTH: ¶ Baby, it's cold outside. ¶"
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"(crashing)"
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"Yarr. Will someone turn on the damn light?!"
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"A little late, don't you think?"
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"Sorry, I'm just about ready to leave your wonderful town."
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"Great place. Fantastic!"
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"The best Springfield I've ever been in. Whoo!"
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"Whoo-hoo!"
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"Do what? This is just me."
The Simpsons
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