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Clips from BoJack Horseman - Best Thing That Ever Happened (S03E03)

"Let me do this. You'll burn the place to the ground."
BoJack Horseman
"I know you have no sense of obligation to me."
BoJack Horseman
"Mom, I wanna go home."
BoJack Horseman
"How are we coming on the sales meeting? Did you get the big conference room?"
BoJack Horseman
"Winslow wants the big conference room for his presentation to corporate."
BoJack Horseman
"You get back on that phone and you get me that big room."
BoJack Horseman
"Okay, Mom."
BoJack Horseman
"The secret is stirring continuously."
BoJack Horseman
"Right, so that's the secret."
BoJack Horseman
"I'm gonna go roll some more soy balls."
BoJack Horseman
"- Thanks for your help. - Sure."
BoJack Horseman
"How do you know how to do this?"
BoJack Horseman
"Mom was a live-in maid for a rich family."
BoJack Horseman
"So unless I wanted us to be on the street, I had to cover for her, a lot."
BoJack Horseman
"That rich family loved Italian food and champagne fountains."
BoJack Horseman
"And cocaine. And private jets. And screaming at each other."
BoJack Horseman
"- So standard rich people stuff? - I guess."
BoJack Horseman
"It's okay. I know you never remember anything."
BoJack Horseman
"That's not true. I remember the first time we met."
BoJack Horseman
"- Oh. So I guess we'd met before. - That was the third time we met."
BoJack Horseman
"You were passed out in the yard, covered in tapioca pudding."
BoJack Horseman
"- Really? I don't remember that. - Shocker."
BoJack Horseman
"Well, the company's not doing so hot."
BoJack Horseman
"Turns out being an agent and running an agency are two different skills."
BoJack Horseman
"It's like asking a really delicious tomato to make you a tomato sandwich."
BoJack Horseman
"You'll figure it out. Princess Carolyn always lands on her feet."
BoJack Horseman
"Why are you an agent at all if it makes you so miserable?"
BoJack Horseman
"I mean, stuff hasn't been hitting lately. But, usually, I'm really good at it."
BoJack Horseman
"I mean, as much as I'm capable of loving anyone."
BoJack Horseman
"Ta-da!"
BoJack Horseman
"Well, it is truly..."
BoJack Horseman
"how should I put this? Wonderful."
BoJack Horseman
"At one point, a waiter ran through the restaurant on fire."
BoJack Horseman
"Unfortunately, you will be receiving my lowest rating:"
BoJack Horseman
"with which I describe this encounter shall be scathing."
BoJack Horseman
"Mom! I just touched base with Rooney, re: Winslow."
BoJack Horseman
"He's out, we're in. The conference room is ours."
BoJack Horseman
"Perfect! This is the meeting where we finally convince the big boys"
BoJack Horseman
"to let us get babies addicted to vaping!"
BoJack Horseman
"- How about a drink? - I could drink."
BoJack Horseman
"I got pretty badly burnt earlier and in a lot of pain."
BoJack Horseman
"[groans]"
BoJack Horseman
"Ha, ha!"
BoJack Horseman
"That woman was the real actor in the family."
BoJack Horseman
"[Carolyn] I just started working for Marv. I went backstage to introduce myself."
BoJack Horseman
"You told me you were too tired pretending to be nice all night,"
BoJack Horseman
"I'm a real jerk, huh?"
BoJack Horseman
"not fake nice and don't beat around the bush."
BoJack Horseman
"Your heart is tender, so you protect it from people,"
BoJack Horseman
"You have great taste in art,"
BoJack Horseman
"and that pink spot on your nose is just adorable."
BoJack Horseman
"You did it for me, which was very sweet."
BoJack Horseman
"Thanks. You're a good friend to me."
BoJack Horseman
"- BoJack... - Yeah?"
BoJack Horseman
"Yeah. I mean, I think we are."
BoJack Horseman
"Or I think we can be."
BoJack Horseman
"Okay, then as a friend, I'm asking you..."
BoJack Horseman
"Please don't leave me."
BoJack Horseman
"I promise, I'll never ask anything from you again,"
BoJack Horseman
"[whistling a tune]"
BoJack Horseman
"No."
BoJack Horseman
"-♪ I'm BoJack the Horseman ♪ -♪ BoJack ♪"
BoJack Horseman
"♪ And I'm trying to hold on to my past ♪"
BoJack Horseman
"♪ I guess I'll just try And make you understand ♪"
BoJack Horseman
"Boxer vs. Raptor, ♪ Na-na na-na na-na na-na! ♪"
BoJack Horseman
"[funky electronic music]"
BoJack Horseman
"One star! You all eat a flat butt!"
BoJack Horseman
"Did you not know there was a critic here? You own this place."
BoJack Horseman
"Well, my wife and children and therapy man may not agree so much,"
BoJack Horseman
"Now, let us bow our heads and bray."
BoJack Horseman
"[grunts]"
BoJack Horseman
"Modigliani, Masaccio, Marmaduke!"
BoJack Horseman
"But in this version, she's a tub-man,"
BoJack Horseman
"- How did that get in there? - What is that?"
BoJack Horseman
""Our relationship no longer has any professional integrity."
BoJack Horseman
"or get wrapped up in some crisis or emergency or vague sadness."
BoJack Horseman
"You do not talk to me like that and walk away."
BoJack Horseman
"- Not now. - We have a slight problem in the kitchen."
BoJack Horseman
"You like it when I'm a mess."
BoJack Horseman
""BoJack, you're such a big, stupid asshole."
BoJack Horseman
"Are you watching a movie?"
BoJack Horseman
"Okay. Who gets these soy balls and onion cubes?"
BoJack Horseman
"I liked being with you. And I don't regret it."
BoJack Horseman
"- Did you ever love me? At all? - I don't-- I'm not--"
BoJack Horseman
"- We gotta put out that fire! - I hate Mondays!"
BoJack Horseman
"so I feel obligated to give you your job back."
BoJack Horseman
"You look lovely. It's a great blouse."
BoJack Horseman
"She had a little trouble bending her elbow too much. Glug, glug."
BoJack Horseman
"Because I'm good at it."
BoJack Horseman
"So you'll give Elefante a good review?"
BoJack Horseman
"Oh, no, I can't do that. I waited over two hours to be served."
BoJack Horseman
"Yes! Corporation!"
BoJack Horseman
"And then what happened?"
BoJack Horseman
"You let me help you tonight because you knew I needed it."
BoJack Horseman
"I can turn this around, I just need more time."
BoJack Horseman
"[waiter] I got it."
BoJack Horseman
"[continues whistling]"
BoJack Horseman
"♪ It's been so long I don't think I'm gonna last ♪"
BoJack Horseman
"Then I sprinkled happy pills on them, and washed it all down"
BoJack Horseman
"Ignore him. Why are you sweating bullets and/or nets?"
BoJack Horseman
"Yes, right away!"
BoJack Horseman
"That's enough out of you."
BoJack Horseman
"Excuse me? Waiter?"
BoJack Horseman
"I do love you, by the way."
BoJack Horseman
"Hey! Mockumentary is not a trope, it's a device for storytelling."
BoJack Horseman
"You're Princess Carolyn."
BoJack Horseman
"but please, give me six months."
BoJack Horseman
"♪ That I'm more horse than a man ♪"
BoJack Horseman
"- Ugh. - [music stops]"
BoJack Horseman
"[both moan]"
BoJack Horseman
"Good luck finding another charming first-generation Italian immigrant"
BoJack Horseman
"♪ Or I'm more man than a horse ♪"
BoJack Horseman
"Are we friends?"
BoJack Horseman
"or have a gut feeling about the ratings for your television show last night."
BoJack Horseman
"Can you come over? I need you."
BoJack Horseman
"- I'm not planning on staying long. - Okay."
BoJack Horseman
"Talking on the phone pretty much every day,"
BoJack Horseman
"- We're headed down a road that-- - You washed-up has-been no-good joke!"
BoJack Horseman
""When you reflect on this, you'll see it's best for both of us."
BoJack Horseman
"I don't wanna get in the middle of this, it's none of my business,"
BoJack Horseman
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