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Clips from Heathers

TV Series 1989–2018 40 min ★ 5.5/10 (3,123 ratings) 1,269 clips
Drama Crime Comedy

Credits

when I was just a little girl
"when I was just a little girl"
Heathers
what will I be
"what will I be"
Heathers
here's what she said to me
"here's what she said to me"
Heathers
the future's not ours to see
"the future's not ours to see"
Heathers
que sera, sera
"que sera, sera"
Heathers
this was her wise reply
"this was her wise reply"
Heathers
Damn.
"Damn."
Heathers
It's your turn, Heather.
"It's your turn, Heather."
Heathers
No, Heather. It's Heather's turn.
"No, Heather. It's Heather's turn."
Heathers
whatever will be, will be
"whatever will be, will be"
Heathers
the future's not ours to see
"the future's not ours to see"
Heathers
que sera, sera
"que sera, sera"
Heathers
que sera, sera
"que sera, sera"
Heathers
Dear diary,
"Dear diary,"
Heathers
She said, "real life sucks losers dry."
"She said, "real life sucks losers dry.""
Heathers
I said, "so, you teach people how to spread their wings and fly ?"
"I said, "so, you teach people how to spread their wings and fly ?""
Heathers
She said, "yes."
"She said, "yes.""
Heathers
God, come on, Veronica.
"God, come on, Veronica."
Heathers
What is your damage, Heather ?
"What is your damage, Heather ?"
Heathers
Don't blame me. Blame Heather. She told me to haul your ass into the caf pronto.
"Don't blame me. Blame Heather. She told me to haul your ass into the caf pronto."
Heathers
- Back me up, Heather. - Yeah, she really wants to talk to you, Veronica.
"- Back me up, Heather. - Yeah, she really wants to talk to you, Veronica."
Heathers
I got a note of Kurt Kelly's.
"I got a note of Kurt Kelly's."
Heathers
I need you to forge a hot and horny but realistically low-key note in Kurt's handwriting...
"I need you to forge a hot and horny but realistically low-key note in Kurt's handwriting..."
Heathers
Heather, I don't have anything against Martha Dunnstock.
"Heather, I don't have anything against Martha Dunnstock."
Heathers
You don't have anything for her either.
"You don't have anything for her either."
Heathers
Come on. It'll be very.
"Come on. It'll be very."
Heathers
- I'll think about it. - Don't think.
"- I'll think about it. - Don't think."
Heathers
Veronica needs something to write on. Heather, bend over.
"Veronica needs something to write on. Heather, bend over."
Heathers
"dear Martha, you're so sweet."
""dear Martha, you're so sweet.""
Heathers
I'm telling you, man, it would be so righteous...
"I'm telling you, man, it would be so righteous..."
Heathers
To be in a Veronica Sawyer/ Heather Chandler sandwich.
"To be in a Veronica Sawyer/ Heather Chandler sandwich."
Heathers
I wanna get Heather and put her on my Johnson and start spinning her around...
"I wanna get Heather and put her on my Johnson and start spinning her around..."
Heathers
[ boy ] Westerberg feeds the world. Come on, people.
"[ boy ] Westerberg feeds the world. Come on, people."
Heathers
Let's give that leftover lunch money to people who don't have lunches.
"Let's give that leftover lunch money to people who don't have lunches."
Heathers
God, aren't they fed yet ?
"God, aren't they fed yet ?"
Heathers
Do they even have Thanksgiving in Africa ?
"Do they even have Thanksgiving in Africa ?"
Heathers
Oh, sure. Pilgrims, Indians, tater tots. It's a real party continent.
"Oh, sure. Pilgrims, Indians, tater tots. It's a real party continent."
Heathers
Sawyer, guess what today is.
"Sawyer, guess what today is."
Heathers
Ouch. Lunchtime poll ?
"Ouch. Lunchtime poll ?"
Heathers
So, what's the question ? Yeah, what's the question, Heather ?
"So, what's the question ? Yeah, what's the question, Heather ?"
Heathers
Goddamn, Heather. You were with me in study hall when I thought of it.
"Goddamn, Heather. You were with me in study hall when I thought of it."
Heathers
I forgot.
"I forgot."
Heathers
Such a pillowcase.
"Such a pillowcase."
Heathers
This wouldn't be that bizarro thing you were babbling about over the phone last night ?
"This wouldn't be that bizarro thing you were babbling about over the phone last night ?"
Heathers
Of course it is.
"Of course it is."
Heathers
- Oh, Veronica, I'm sorry. - Betty Finn. Gosh.
"- Oh, Veronica, I'm sorry. - Betty Finn. Gosh."
Heathers
I'm really sorry I couldn't make it to your birthday party last month.
"I'm really sorry I couldn't make it to your birthday party last month."
Heathers
That's okay. Your mom said you had a big date.
"That's okay. Your mom said you had a big date."
Heathers
I was looking around the other day and I dug up, uh,
"I was looking around the other day and I dug up, uh,"
Heathers
These old photographs.
"These old photographs."
Heathers
Oh, wow. These are great.
"Oh, wow. These are great."
Heathers
Oh, great. Here comes Heather.
"Oh, great. Here comes Heather."
Heathers
Oh, shit.
"Oh, shit."
Heathers
Hi, Courtney. Love your cardigan.
"Hi, Courtney. Love your cardigan."
Heathers
Thanks. I just got it last night from limited.
"Thanks. I just got it last night from limited."
Heathers
You win $5 million from the publisher's sweepstakes.
"You win $5 million from the publisher's sweepstakes."
Heathers
And the same day that that big Ed guy gives you the check,
"And the same day that that big Ed guy gives you the check,"
Heathers
Aliens land on the earth and say they're gonna blow up the world in two days.
"Aliens land on the earth and say they're gonna blow up the world in two days."
Heathers
- What do you do ? - [ boy ] that's easy.
"- What do you do ? - [ boy ] that's easy."
Heathers
I'd just slide that wad over to my father,
"I'd just slide that wad over to my father,"
Heathers
'cause he is like one of the top brokers in the state.
"'cause he is like one of the top brokers in the state."
Heathers
If I got that money, I'd give it all to the homeless. Every cent.
"If I got that money, I'd give it all to the homeless. Every cent."
Heathers
If you're gonna openly be a bitch--
"If you're gonna openly be a bitch--"
Heathers
If I did, I probably wouldn't mind talking to the geek squad.
"If I did, I probably wouldn't mind talking to the geek squad."
Heathers
Did you see that ? Heather number one just looked right at me.
"Did you see that ? Heather number one just looked right at me."
Heathers
Does it not bother you that everybody in this school thinks that you're a piranha ?
"Does it not bother you that everybody in this school thinks that you're a piranha ?"
Heathers
Like I give a shit.
"Like I give a shit."
Heathers
They all want me as a friend or a fuck.
"They all want me as a friend or a fuck."
Heathers
I'm worshipped at Westerberg. And I'm only a Junior.
"I'm worshipped at Westerberg. And I'm only a Junior."
Heathers
I can't believe this. We're going to a party at Remington university tonight...
"I can't believe this. We're going to a party at Remington university tonight..."
Heathers
Hi. Hi.
"Hi. Hi."
Heathers
So, this is what's called a lunchtime poll.
"So, this is what's called a lunchtime poll."
Heathers
You win $5 million in the publisher's sweepstakes.
"You win $5 million in the publisher's sweepstakes."
Heathers
And the same day that what's-his-face gives you the check,
"And the same day that what's-his-face gives you the check,"
Heathers
They're gonna blow up the world in two days.
"They're gonna blow up the world in two days."
Heathers
What are you gonna do with the money ?
"What are you gonna do with the money ?"
Heathers
I'd go to Egypt... With a girl.
"I'd go to Egypt... With a girl."
Heathers
I'd use the money for an end-of-the-world get-together.
"I'd use the money for an end-of-the-world get-together."
Heathers
I'd pay Madonna a million bucks to sit on my face...
"I'd pay Madonna a million bucks to sit on my face..."
Heathers
That's gotta be the most spooky-ass question I ever heard.
"That's gotta be the most spooky-ass question I ever heard."
Heathers
This is important. After taxes, I'll only be getting--
"This is important. After taxes, I'll only be getting--"
Heathers
- She should pay me, though. - You go to the zoo and you get a lion.
"- She should pay me, though. - You go to the zoo and you get a lion."
Heathers
And then you put a remote-control bomb up its butt.
"And then you put a remote-control bomb up its butt."
Heathers
And then there's social security, legal fees--
"And then there's social security, legal fees--"
Heathers
What ?
"What ?"
Heathers
Oh, my God. Here we go.
"Oh, my God. Here we go."
Heathers
[ cackling ]
"[ cackling ]"
Heathers
Hi, Veronica. A five keeps an Infant alive.
"Hi, Veronica. A five keeps an Infant alive."
Heathers
If I wasn't already the head of it, I'd want the same thing.
"If I wasn't already the head of it, I'd want the same thing."
Heathers
Come on, Veronica. You used to have a sense of humor.
"Come on, Veronica. You used to have a sense of humor."
Heathers
Veronica, could you come back here a minute ?
"Veronica, could you come back here a minute ?"
Heathers
A true friend's work is never done.
"A true friend's work is never done."
Heathers
Gross. Gross.
"Gross. Gross."
Heathers
Grow up, Heather. Bulimia is so '87.
"Grow up, Heather. Bulimia is so '87."
Heathers
Come on, Heather. Let's take another look at today's lunch.
"Come on, Heather. Let's take another look at today's lunch."
Heathers
God, Veronica, drool much ?
"God, Veronica, drool much ?"
Heathers
He's in my American history.
"He's in my American history."
Heathers
Hello, Jason Dean.
"Hello, Jason Dean."
Heathers
You a Heather ? No.
"You a Heather ? No."
Heathers
I'm a Veronica... Sawyer.
"I'm a Veronica... Sawyer."
Heathers
This may seem like a really stupid question.
"This may seem like a really stupid question."
Heathers
You inherit $5 million the same day aliens land on the earth...
"You inherit $5 million the same day aliens land on the earth..."
Heathers
What do you do ?
"What do you do ?"
Heathers
That's the stupidest question I've ever heard.
"That's the stupidest question I've ever heard."
Heathers
Bo Diddley ?
"Bo Diddley ?"
Heathers
I don't know. Probably row out to the middle of the lake somewhere,
"I don't know. Probably row out to the middle of the lake somewhere,"
Heathers
Bring along a bottle of tequila,
"Bring along a bottle of tequila,"
Heathers
My sax and, uh, some Bach.
"My sax and, uh, some Bach."
Heathers
How very.
"How very."
Heathers
Let's kick his ass.
"Let's kick his ass."
Heathers
We're too old for that kind of crap.
"We're too old for that kind of crap."
Heathers
You're gonna eat this ?
"You're gonna eat this ?"
Heathers
What did your boyfriend say when you told him you were moving to Sherwood, Ohio ?
"What did your boyfriend say when you told him you were moving to Sherwood, Ohio ?"
Heathers
Answer him, dick.
"Answer him, dick."
Heathers
Oh, yeah. They seem to have an open-door policy for assholes, though, don't they ?
"Oh, yeah. They seem to have an open-door policy for assholes, though, don't they ?"
Heathers
What did you say, dick-head ?
"What did you say, dick-head ?"
Heathers
I'll repeat myself.
"I'll repeat myself."
Heathers
God, they won't expel him. They'll just suspend him for a week or something.
"God, they won't expel him. They'll just suspend him for a week or something."
Heathers
He used a real gun. They should throw his ass in jail.
"He used a real gun. They should throw his ass in jail."
Heathers
[ Veronica ] no way. He used blanks.
"[ Veronica ] no way. He used blanks."
Heathers