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Clips from The Simpsons - The Mook, the Chef, the Wife and Her Homer (S18E18)

"Fu-u-u-u... nk."
The Simpsons
"Oh, knock it off, Kearney. Why are you still in this school anyway?"
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"Stupid school doesn't know how to teach me."
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"World music?"
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"What's up, Metallica? Need a lift?"
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"We don't take rides from strangers."
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"Bye-bye, take care, watch your step,"
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"Can't... talk... now. I'm spanking a child."
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"I have to drive you and your friends to school."
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"Whoa. "Squirrels don't like rocks.""
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"He's so gross and stupid."
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"Michael, my son. Here is your book,"
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"Oh, stop, stop!"
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"Now if you excuse me, I'm brewing tea and I have to go jiggle my bags!"
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"Well, you're not going to find any here."
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"Not that bad."
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"We'd love to!"
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"Actually, you can really keep costs down"
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"Boss, the Calabresis are here for the sit-down."
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"The sit-down's tonight?!"
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"When we saw you driving that carpool,"
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"And wreak a terrible vengeance."
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"Any other lies?"
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"Over here, over here."
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"Papa, I brought you some dessert."
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"What's he gonna do if we rub you out, serve our soup cold?"
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"Fat Tony, it's not important what other people think of you."
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"With Fat Tony doing the morphine mambo,"
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"Homer, our house is on fire! Help me save the children!"
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"on your abonjoola is if you take your dad's place."
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"You are a hybrid: half idiot, half moron."
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"All right, tap jockey, you owe Fat Tony 50 bucks. Cough it up!"
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"They're all bums. They never pay!"
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"How's the big guy doing?"
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"Homer, where'd you get that truck?"
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"I got your, uh, phone bill in my mail by mistake,"
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"You monster! Just cut his Achilles tendon with this knife."
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"Walk the dog once in a while. He's a furry little fitness machine."
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"And I can stop looking the other way from what my husband's doing."
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"Lady."
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"Well done, my son."
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"In making peace with our enemies, you were able to take them down."
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"Otto, Bart won't give me a seat."
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"You know I can deal with your problem or I can rock out."
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"But I cannot do both."
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"We're an American band We're an American band"
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"We're comin' to your town We'll help you party down"
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"We're an American band..."
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"Otto, help me."
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"What am I hearing now?"
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"Nature?"
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"The ultimate bring-down."
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"Why..."
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"was I... born?!"
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"Don't worry, dude. We'll hook you up with some tunes."
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"Old McDonald had a fart Fart, fart, fart, fart, fart"
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"And on his fart, he had a fart. Fart, fart, fart, fart, fart."
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"Real songs are about deals with the devil, far-off lands,"
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"and where you'd find smoke in relation to water."
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"Mister driver?"
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"One of my bus mates has purloined my French horn."
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"Why can't you talk like a dude?"
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"We were in third grade together."
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"The farts on the bus go round and round..."
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"Oh, wow, this is about 90% less funny than you think it is."
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"W-wait... the radio. That'll drown 'em out."
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"Disco?"
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"Easy listening."
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"Country Western?"
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"Urban smooth?"
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"Salsa fusion?"
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"Metallica?"
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"- Am I on drugs? - Yes, you are,"
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"but that really is Metallica."
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"I'm no stranger. Remember this?"
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"Metallica ru-u-u...les!"
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"Oh, yeah, Springfield Arena, 1997, Row XX, Seat 64."
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"- You saved me that night. - So what are you waiting for? Hop in."
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"Hop in what?"
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"Look at me, I'm Otto. I'm a hundred years old, and I drive a school bus."
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"Oh, man. Maybe me and Metallica can go splitsies on a cab."
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"Hey, loser, we got a ride from a real fan."
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"eat my shorts, have a good one."
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"She's all yours, dude. Oh, and I think I ran over a moose."
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"Otto. Are you meting out corporal punishment?"
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"You are temporarily suspended from bus driving, with pay."
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"- No...! - Hand in your beaded seat-cover."
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"And your gun."
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"I hope you're happy, Bart. Thanks to your hijinks,"
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"Let me drive. I go through yellow lights."
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"One more crack out of you, young man,"
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"and I'm showing everyone your baby pictures."
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"Sorry, sorry, sorry."
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"Carpool!"
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"Hey, Lisa, my safety bar matches your eyes."
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"Carpool, Nelson!"
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"Just a sec, I've got to finish my science project."
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"Okay, just one more kid to pick up."
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"Ew, it's Michael."
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"That weird kid who never says anything."
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"- Hi, Michael. - Hi, Michael."
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"Hey, dork, you're sittin' on my shadow."
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"Sorry."
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"What, you're too good to sitn my shadow?"
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"Aw, I forgot my math book."
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"No problem, I'll just drive up to your house and get it."
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"Whoa. Your mother must dance at the nicest strip club in town."
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"and never forget: the divisor goes into the dividend."
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"Yes, Papa."
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"That was Fat Tony."
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"Your dad's a mob boss?"
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"Please don't have me whacked. I was just kidding around."
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"We were all having fun. Wasn't it fun?"
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"Oh, fun is so fun."
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"There is no Mafia."
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"Columbus Day is better than Christmas."
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"He's Fat Tony's son!"
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"His daddy putted bullets in my daddy."
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"My daddy had to potty in a bag."
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"Ah, look at all this puke! Why did I come in on my day off?"
The Simpsons
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