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Clips from Friends - The One with the Fertility Test (S09E09)

"-lt's time l took my life back. -Good for you, Pheebs."
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"l love you."
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"Got you! Die! Die! Die!"
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"Respectfully, Professor R. Geller."
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"The museum was amazing."
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"Yeah, Joey really knows his art, huh?"
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"Not so much, no."
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"...and some of it didn't even make any sense."
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"...he was talking about paintings that were nowhere around."
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"-No. No, we went to the left. -Oh, Joey, Joey, Joey."
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"Yeah. Yeah, it's fun."
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"Actually, Joey's your friend..."
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"...and you don't know me that well. lt'd be weird."
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"Well, l mean, a little. But no, what? Go on."
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"Well...."
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"l'm thinking that maybe Joey isn't the right guy for me right now."
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"You know, maybe l should be with someone..."
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"...l have more in common with. You know what l mean?"
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"Yeah."
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"l mean, he's a great guy."
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"And sure, he doesn't know that much about art..."
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"...but you can always talk about that with someone else."
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"You know, that's the kind of guy Joey is."
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"Plus, he is hot!"
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"That was gonna be my next argument."
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"-You ready? -Yeah. Let's go."
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"Wow!"
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"-Thanks, Ross. -Yeah."
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"Glad l could help, man."
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"Hello?"
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"Oh. Hi, Dr. Connelly."
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"...but l can tell her."
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"Should l be sitting down for this?"
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"Thanks."
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"Dr. Connelly just called."
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"With good news? Of course it's not good news."
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"You said, ''Dr. Connelly just called.''"
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"lf it was good, you'd have said, ''Dr. Connelly just called!''"
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"ls there a problem? ls there a problem with me, or with you?"
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"What?"
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"Apparently, my sperm have low motility..."
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"...and you have an inhospitable environment."
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"Well, what does that mean?"
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"lt means that my guys won't get off their Barcaloungers..."
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"...and you have a uterus that is prepared to kill the ones that do."
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"lt means that we can keep trying..."
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"...but there's a good chance this may never happen for us."
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"l'm sorry."
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"l'm sorry too."
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"...we're gonna figure this out."
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"l know."
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"Here's your schedule for the day. Your first client is in Room 1 ."
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"''Rachel Greene.'' Son of a bitch! She came back?"
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"...those nerds would get laid!"
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"-Oh, you know, l'll come with you. -Okay."
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"-So a professor, huh? -Yeah. She is cool. And she's so smart."
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"Hey, you guys. Look what l just got."
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"l can't go hunting."
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"You know how l feel about these big massage places."
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"She wants to go hunting too!"
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"-Oh, yeah? -Yeah. Hey."
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"All righty then."
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"Listen, is there someone who can fill in for me?"
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"Okay, are they listening?"
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"Oh, that's what she meant."
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"You know what? She loves architecture."
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"-And you know what--? -Okay, slow down."
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"...nobody's gonna wanna watch that."
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"Mr. Bing? Here you are."
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"No one here even knows you."
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"-ls something wrong? -No, it's just...."
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"So did you do it? Did you make your deposit?"
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"...but you can't do it at a doctor's office?"
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"lt was a Wendy's!"
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"Man, you can lie about Sweden!"
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"Be true to what you believe in."
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"-Hey. -Hi."
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"Wait a minute. When you guys walked into the Met, did you go to the right?"
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"What?"
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"Yeah, but you know what?"
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"l think you should give Joey a chance."
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"-l guess that's true. -lf you think about it..."
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"Oh, my God."
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"No, you can't go there!"
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"But the guy l said it to dies in the next scene..."
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"-Come on in. How are you? -l'm good."
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"You know what? l have a friend who's a masseuse."
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"Still, it seems like you guys are having a great time together."
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"You're going way too fast. Okay? Just go back to the Met."
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"Okay. Let's see."
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"l mean, Joey's so different from the guys l usually date."
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"Know your audience."
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"Oh, come on!"
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"...to highlight the anguish of the central figure."
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"l think it's a good idea to find out if everything's okay."
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"Okay. Okay, thank you."
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"Yeah, l'm kind of having a little problem."
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"-Why didn't you tell me you work here? -l don't have to tell you everything!"
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"Okay, trying to turn me on by making a mess?"
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"Oh, it's a gift certificate to this new spa in SoHo."
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"He is very sweet."
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"All l'm saying is, l don't think that Joey and Charlie have anything in common."
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"-Sorry. Everyone is booked. -That woman can't know l work here."
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"No, no, no. The Met. The Metropolitan Museum of Art."
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"That's the antiquities wing."
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"No. Well, she's not here..."
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"Oh, yeah! Rachel talks too!"
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"Guess that's not how she used it."
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"l don't ordinarily go around kissing guys at parties."
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"They're all professors, intellectuals. Paleontologists mostly."
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"Well, she wants to go to all these cultural places..."
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"-Come on. -No. No!"
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"l just want to thank whoever knocked on the door while l was in there."
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"-Wow. What an interesting name. -Yeah."
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"What a rich culture."
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"What's that? Hey, Rachel?"
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"Some of the stuff wasn't where you said it would be, but l made it work."
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"Yeah, that means-- We just don't have time for this."
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"Because Ross is the father of my child."
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"God, l forgot how hot she was."
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