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Clips from Archer - Double Indecency (S07E07)
"And you have no idea what that means."
Archer
"Because you scream at me when I don't!"
Archer
"that, no, I wasn't going to."
Archer
""Zissner"? Wait, as in Don Zissner?"
Archer
"She has no idea."
Archer
"He's a huge producer. He makes those massive, stupid, sharky blockbusters."
Archer
"- We get it! - Let me finish. Sharknoid Five."
Archer
"I'm Barbie Zissner."
Archer
"Oh!"
Archer
"Mrs. Donald Zissner."
Archer
"Second, you've each been given a non-disclosure agreement to sign."
Archer
"Third..."
Archer
"Because A, it's super skeevy, and..."
Archer
"She agreed to pay us $20,000."
Archer
"so if we can wedge ourselves into that divorce..."
Archer
"And so on and so on and so on."
Archer
"If it's poor people."
Archer
"I'm sorry. Is there another option?"
Archer
"- Uh, boosh? - And-or kakow?"
Archer
"Cyril, come on. You can't do it."
Archer
"Or at least our best five inches."
Archer
"I don't care if it's..."
Archer
"and a roll of gaffer tape."
Archer
"- For? - D-I-Y Brazilian."
Archer
"If we win, you get his share."
Archer
"that you would actually have sex with a man."
Archer
"And I wish y'all every happiness,"
Archer
"I bet Krieger can seduce Barbie Zissner before you."
Archer
"Me, on the other hand..."
Archer
"I'm gonna seduce the dick off that dude."
Archer
"Oww!"
Archer
"who, by the way, Lana, kissed me,"
Archer
"Trick question. It's today."
Archer
"Although, I guess so is everything."
Archer
"Hey, guys."
Archer
"Uh, let's see. Zissner said she'd be"
Archer
"Uh, let's see. It says here... "main bar.""
Archer
"So, hey, should I get some new clothes?"
Archer
"Cyril, the answer to that question is almost always yes."
Archer
"- What are you... - I'm gonna double the bet."
Archer
"- Double it! - No!"
Archer
"What bet?"
Archer
"And if you seduce her before Cyril does,"
Archer
"Or... not that."
Archer
"Now, remember, Carol. The key here, as with most things,"
Archer
"At least until the ingrown hairs turn me back into Bumplestiltskin."
Archer
"- I wanna double the bet. - No."
Archer
"And confidence is the key."
Archer
"All this nonsense about doubling the bet."
Archer
"- Huh... Well, now who's a racist? - That's not racist."
Archer
"- Name one. - Uh, Shirley Bassey."
Archer
"Damn."
Archer
"Take the bet. Double it."
Archer
"Don't be shitty. I'm in progress."
Archer
"Not a word."
Archer
"I'm serious, Ray. I'm about to punch you"
Archer
"I know. I'm actually banned for life from Willemstad."
Archer
"Oh, well, gracias, amigo."
Archer
"Ha! From you?"
Archer
"out of your ass, because we've got a bet to win!"
Archer
"- What? - Damn it, Archer."
Archer
"Although, silver lining... bet I could eat a whole big bowl of germs right now."
Archer
"Okay, let's go put some stank on it."
Archer
"Taxi!"
Archer
"I bet I'd still be a little oogy."
Archer
"Oh, uh..."
Archer
"- Uh... - Typical."
Archer
"Here you go."
Archer
"Here you go, ladies. Hotel Swindon."
Archer
"Well, it's about time. Pay the man, Lana."
Archer
"Uh, I don't... uh, Pam? I'll get the next one."
Archer
"It's not my birthday!"
Archer
"- It's for work! - Wait, what are you all doing here?"
Archer
"Uh, well, um..."
Archer
"I heard all this commotion out here."
Archer
"- un-clump. - Did he hire you to bang her?"
Archer
"Stop talking!"
Archer
"Goddamn, I wish I was married!"
Archer
"- Not me! - Wha... Mother?"
Archer
"Hey! Whoa-whoa-whoa..."
Archer
"Or what?"
Archer
"Shoo! Shoo! Sha! Sha!"
Archer
"Enter Sandman."
Archer
"I gotta say,"
Archer
"- Whoa, gross. - Oh, God."
Archer
"- I hope. - That's disgusting."
Archer
"Well, whom or whatever's blood it is,"
Archer
"I vote we go rinse it off with a mojito."
Archer
"Thanks. And also sorry, but I don't feel like you've earned a tip, so..."
Archer
"Okay! I'm not the one taking all night to give me back my stuff!"
Archer
"No, you're just the one"
Archer
"who started the brawl that got us all arrested."
Archer
"- Eh, duh. - What?"
Archer
"I feel like I made that very clear."
Archer
"Unlike this cryptic idiocy!"
Archer
"Why do you even bother to answer the phone?"
Archer
"Volume! Jesus!"
Archer
"Like I've been saying for years."
Archer
"Did you give her bourbon?"
Archer
"You know, I was going to, and then I realized"
Archer
"Always worked for Sterling."
Archer
"And you're just gonna..."
Archer
"- Yeah, too sleepy. - What is this?"
Archer
"Sharknoid, Sharknoid 2, Sharknoid 3 In 3-D, Sharknoid 4, Shark..."
Archer
"- But other than that... - We have no idea."
Archer
"Or why she even bothers to answer the phone."
Archer
"- Good morning. - Hi,"
Archer
"- Maybe. - I'm sorry?"
Archer
"Oh, please forgive me, Miss..."
Archer
"- Mrs. - Mrs. Zissner, of course, yes."
Archer
"Your 10:00 is here."
Archer
"I know. Thank you."
Archer
"First off, killer marketing campaign."
Archer
"Goddamn it."
Archer
"that your great-great-grandchildren"
Archer
"will spend their short, miserable lives"
Archer
"as indentured servants to mine."
Archer
"Is that clear?"
Archer
"I'm not really sure how to put this,"
Archer
"- That's so sad. - Oh."
Archer
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