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Clips from This Fool - Y Tu Julio También (S01E01)

"Shea butter."
This Fool
"FABIAN: He thinks we're a charity case."
This Fool
"Martyr-ass bitch."
This Fool
"- Make a wish, bitch."
This Fool
"'Cause your birthday's getting celebrated."
This Fool
"- Damn, that cake looks bomb!"
This Fool
"Hey, check this shit out."
This Fool
"[inhaling]"
This Fool
"[in squeaky voice] Julio? Let's get his ass."
This Fool
"♪"
This Fool
"♪"
This Fool
"MINISTER PAYNE: Stop right there!"
This Fool
"Luis told me everything."
This Fool
"- You fuckin' lied to me."
This Fool
"- We just wanna celebrate your birthday."
This Fool
"- You made me do this."
This Fool
"- Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey."
This Fool
"[Minister Payne groans sharply]"
This Fool
"- Come on, get him! - Go! Go!"
This Fool
"- What happened?"
This Fool
"- He fucking bit me, bit right through the fabric."
This Fool
"- Let's get his ass!"
This Fool
"[overlapping chatter]"
This Fool
"♪"
This Fool
"Where do you think you're going, man?"
This Fool
"- Get out, homey."
This Fool
"♪ Happy birthday to you ♪"
This Fool
"♪ Happy birthday to you ♪"
This Fool
"- What the fuck is wrong with them?"
This Fool
"♪ Happy birthday, dear Julio ♪"
This Fool
"- Time to eat your cake, birthday bitch!"
This Fool
"♪ Happy birthday to you ♪"
This Fool
"[groans]"
This Fool
"[clamoring]"
This Fool
"♪"
This Fool
"- Hold this."
This Fool
"[inhaling]"
This Fool
"[in squeaky voice] This isn't over, motherfucker."
This Fool
"[window rattling]"
This Fool
"- Maggie? - Shouldn't leave your window unlocked."
This Fool
"There's a lot of perverts and sick fucks out there."
This Fool
"- You didn't text me back."
This Fool
"- About that earthquake that didn't happen?"
This Fool
"You're so pathetic."
This Fool
"Now move over, loser."
This Fool
"- What are you doing here?"
This Fool
"We broke up again. - I know."
This Fool
"But it's your birthday. I had to come by and give you your gift."
This Fool
"- I don't want anything. - Bullshit."
This Fool
"- So you think you know me, huh?"
This Fool
"- I'm the only one who knows you."
This Fool
"And I know exactly what you want."
This Fool
"- Oh, yeah? What is that?"
This Fool
"- You wanna lie here and stare at the ceiling"
This Fool
"and think about how much you fucking hate yourself."
This Fool
"[Julio sighs]"
This Fool
"Because you're 31 and you still live at your mom's house"
This Fool
"because you chose a career path"
This Fool
"that doesn't lead to financial independence."
This Fool
"- Oh, yeah? Fuck. [rumbling]"
This Fool
"- And also because you broke up with me,"
This Fool
"because you're scared of commitment."
This Fool
"So you're all alone."
This Fool
"- Oh, shit, this is good."
This Fool
"- But guess what, sucio?"
This Fool
"I'm here now, and I'm gonna let you have your cake and eat it too."
This Fool
"- Oh, fuck, yeah. [rumbling intensifies]"
This Fool
"- So we're just gonna lie here"
This Fool
"and be fucking miserable all night long!"
This Fool
"- Oh, fuck! - Oh, yeah!"
This Fool
"[rumbling continues]"
This Fool
"Whoa."
This Fool
"You feel that earthquake?"
This Fool
"[rumbling continues]"
This Fool
"[knock on door]"
This Fool
"[knocking continues]"
This Fool
"LUIS: Hey, Julio, it's me."
This Fool
"- Fuckin' leave me alone."
This Fool
"LUIS: I'm sorry that I told everybody it was your birthday."
This Fool
"I know you don't like to make a big deal out of it,"
This Fool
"but, you know, you've done a lot to help me out."
This Fool
"- I know you had good intentions."
This Fool
"It's all good."
This Fool
"LUIS: Hey, listen, I really think"
This Fool
"you should come out tonight."
This Fool
"I promise we'll do it up right, primo."
This Fool
"- I'd rather kick it by myself."
This Fool
"LUIS: Come on, dawg."
This Fool
"We don't even gotta go out anywhere."
This Fool
"Just come out and have a pisto with me."
This Fool
"- You didn't hear me? I said no!"
This Fool
"LUIS: Alright, then, you fuckin' pussy."
This Fool
"Have it your way."
This Fool
"[doorknob rattling]"
This Fool
"♪ ominous music playing ♪"
This Fool
"♪"
This Fool
"[clicks]"
This Fool
"♪"
This Fool
"- What the fuck?"
This Fool
"[eerily] ♪ Happy birthday to you ♪"
This Fool
"What the fuck?"
This Fool
"LUIS: Get him, homeys, get him! - No! No!"
This Fool
"LUIS: Watch out, that fool bites. - Get the fuck off me!"
This Fool
"LUIS: His teeth are fucked up, but they're strong!"
This Fool
"JULIO: No! No!"
This Fool
"Respect my birthday wishes!"
This Fool
"♪ music playing on TV ♪"
This Fool
"JULIO: Leave me the fuck alone! No!"
This Fool
"No! No!"
This Fool
"LUIS: Surprise!"
This Fool
"You're at a bowling alley, bitch."
This Fool
"You ready for the best fuckin' birthday of your life, primo?"
This Fool
"Come on, tell the homey your shoe size."
This Fool
"- Three."
This Fool
"- Don't be stupid."
This Fool
"♪"
This Fool
"♪ Magic Carpet Ride by Steppenwolf playing ♪"
This Fool
"[cheering]"
This Fool
"♪"
This Fool
"♪ Right between the sound machine ♪"
This Fool
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