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Clips from Project X

"BOY: Is it true what I heard about you at Zam's party?"
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"You got a blowjob from his mom?"
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"That party was so sick. Everyone got laid."
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"Wheelchair Robert even got a handjob."
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"BOY: Nice. - Are you kidding me?"
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"Why the fuck weren't we at that party, man?"
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"So we missed a party, dude. Big deal."
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"It is a big deal. We miss every party."
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"I mean, did you hear that guy? Wheelchair Robert got beat off."
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"I wanna show you something. See this? Check this out."
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"That's Stasia. Gorgeous, right? That's my girl back in Queens."
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"We could be crushing this kind of ass, but we need a game changer."
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"I mean, no one even knows who we are."
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"If we want to be bigtime players, we need to make a bigtime play."
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"You feel me?"
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"J.B., what the fuck, man? Why do you have a boner?"
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"- I don't, it's just my underwear sitting funny. - Cover up."
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"COSTA: That's absolutely disgusting."
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"THOMAS: It's easy to talk shit when the party's not even at your house."
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"COSTA: Dude, please don't back out. This party is gonna change everything for us."
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"Okay. Well, I mean, I'm the one taking the whole risk."
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"All you do is show up and drink."
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"You think we'd ditch you if something went wrong?"
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"- I'm fucking offended, man. - Yeah, me too."
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"The idea behind tonight is to get these bitches..."
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"...to recognize us as large-scale ballers."
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"Back in Queens, I had hoes blowing me on the reg."
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"- I started hanging out with you two. Zero! - I just don't really see the point any more."
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"COSTA: How do you not see the point? There's the point. There's the point."
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"THOMAS: Okay."
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"COSTA: There's two more fucking points right there! It's all around you."
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"THOMAS: Dude, I get it."
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"If you fuck this up, I will stab you. I'm not kidding."
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"- Okay, no more than 20 people. - Twenty people?"
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"- All right, 30 people. - Thirty people?"
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"- To make sure my house doesn't get fucked. J.B.: Thirty people won't change anything for us."
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"All right, look, okay, 50 people, absolute max."
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"Fine, 50 people, absolute max."
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"You know, just big enough to be cool."
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"MAN (ON TV): Sand, an adversary in many ways more dangerous than those carrying weapons."
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"Mass marketing, handled."
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"(CELL PHONES VIBRATING)"
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"- Shh. COSTA: Yeah, of course, Jack. Anything."
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"And if you guys get there before we get there..."
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"...you can just get in the backyard and set up..."
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"- ...and do what you gotta do. - Dax, Dax. Go film over the top."
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"COSTA: Okay. Really, we appreciate that."
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"Oh, uh... I have to call you back, sir. I'm sorry."
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"What are you doing? Get the fuck out of here!"
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"THOMAS: What the fuck are you doing? - Guys. Hey, guys, what the fuck?"
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"(J.B. & THOMAS LAUGHING)"
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"COSTA: Are you fucking with me right now?"
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"J.B.: Look. COSTA: That was a business call for your party."
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"THOMAS: Who takes a shit and makes a business call?"
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"COSTA: Are you kidding? THOMAS: Now you can shit in peace."
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"COSTA: Come on, dude. I can't see a thing. It's dark as fuck in here."
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"(COACH SPEAKING INDISTINCTLY)"
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"COSTA: Dax, come on. Let's get closer."
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"Basically chill."
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"I'm letting Costa plan most of it."
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"Oh, that sounds like a really brilliant idea."
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"No, he's doing a good job. He's getting, like, a bunch of booze and then..."
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"...I think, like, a DJ."
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"- A DJ. Super chill. THOMAS: Ha."
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"Guess what Mama Kub and Papa Kub got for..."
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"- Baby Kub? - ...Baby Kub for his birthday."
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"- What? - The Kub Mobile."
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"- They gave you the minivan? - For my birthday, yes."
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"Your parents give the worst gifts ever."
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"- Where's your present? - You serious?"
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"You haven't gotten me a present in 10 years."
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"So?"
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"But since I am a better friend than you, I did get you something."
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"- Oh. - I'll bring it tonight. Hey, I have to go run."
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"- Happy birthday, loser. - Ow."
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"- Don't trip. KIRBY: Ow!"
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"THOMAS: Oh, shit! KIRBY: I'm okay! Heh."
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"COSTA: Thomas, suck my cock. THOMAS: What?"
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"- "Mama Kub and Papa Kub"? Jesus. - Yeah, those are my parents, asshole."
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"THOMAS: Damn, she's so fucking hot, dude."
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"- Think she'll come tonight? COSTA: I'm not inviting her. You do this one."
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"J.B.: Alexis won't come. She fucks college dudes."
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"(CELL PHONE VIBRATING)"
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""Lamel"? What? I don't know any Lamel."
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"COSTA: No, he's cool."
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"Guys, the last thing I want in my house is a bunch of randoms."
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"Wrong. Last thing you want is nobody at your fucking house."
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"The more word gets around, the more likely these chicks will show up at our party."
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"Watch and learn how Captain Big Dick does it."
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"(GIRLS CHATTERING)"
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"Hey, girls. Just remember, wear something tight."
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"What's up, sisters? Thomas Kub's house, 8:00."
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"Come get a piece of this white chocolate."
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"DAX: Are you gonna be going to Thomas's birthday party tonight?"
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"- Thomas? Who's that? - Who's Thomas?"
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"(INAUDIBLE DIALOGUE)"
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"That thing that dick in the sweater vest was telling us about?"
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"COSTA: What's up, baby? Eight o'clock."
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"(INAUDIBLE DIALOGUE)"
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"DAX: What are your expectations for the party?"
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"Get high, fuck bitches, you already know."
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"- I think we'll come. Can we bring people? - Can I bring people?"
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"COSTA: Thomas Kub's house, 8:00."
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"Oh, shit!"
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"Ahh!"
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"(THOMAS LAUGHS)"
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"COSTA: What we are witnessing is truly a breathtaking moment..."
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"...in the life of young Thomas."
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"The helpless fetus is growing a tiny, tiny penis..."
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"...a penis he may someday insert into this female's vagina..."
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"...should he survive his first encounter without her eating him."
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"(INAUDIBLE DIALOGUE)"
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"Paper towels. Get long."
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"THOMAS: Don't! - Dude, get a ton."
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"Oh, shit. Extra-large condoms. I'm not paying for that shit."
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"(IN HIGH-PITCHED VOICE) Attention, valued shoppers."
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"THOMAS: Oh, my God."
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"Join us for an evening of balls-deep entertainment at Thomas Kub's house."
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"Dude, stop."
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"COSTA (IN NORMAL VOICE): Hey, little buddy. Want something to drink? Hey."
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