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Clips from Bust Down - Party of Two (S01E01)

"I'd be occupied with Sam or Chris"
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"or figuring out if vampire cum is immortal,"
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"but no, you broke character."
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"You're the one who set off this whole chain"
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"of unfortunate events. - No."
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"- If anything, you slapped yourself, sweetie."
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"- No, that's not true."
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"- Also, I saw that "pals/slap" game on YouTube."
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"I was like, "I gotta give this a shot.""
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"- This is at least true about the universe, though?"
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"- I don't know, nigga."
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"I'm a psychopath. I made it all up."
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"- [whimpers] So what now?"
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"What do you want from me?"
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"- I want to split this check,"
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"and I want you to stop being a bitch"
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"about being a bitch ass nigga."
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"Take it. - Fine."
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"I just want this to stop."
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"What's half of 248?"
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"I can't even concentrate right now."
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"I'm just so upset."
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"I need a minute."
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"Man, I didn't even order the octopus."
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"You ordered that before I got here."
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"- Take all the time you need."
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"After all, we are pals."
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"- Help!"
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"Help! Please, help!"
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"Wait, so you're telling me"
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"you get to go to the mall for free"
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"with theJustin Holiday? - Yeah."
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"- Jrue Holiday's baby brother? - That's the one."
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"- You are sharing cinnamon pretzels with--"
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"- No, no, no, no. No, no, no, no."
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"He's gonna be preparing the pretzels."
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"I'm gonna eat them 'cause I am freshly poppin' superstar"
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"Chris Henson, Social Justice Warrior."
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"- [as Chris] Ha-ha, nigga!"
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"Guess who got named new CEO?"
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"- R.L. Stine. - R.L. Stine."
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"No, motherfucker. Me."
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"What the fuck wrong with you, nigga?"
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"They needed a person of color,"
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"and I'm the only nigga that they knew."
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"all: What? - You?"
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"You goddamn baboon!"
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"- Oh, my. - Come on, bro."
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"- Yo. - Whoa."
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"You wild for that. - You gotta cut that out."
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"For real. - But they wild for that."
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"They lying. They know they just met me, man."
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"This is some bullshit, dog."
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"All real revolutionaries get lost in the shuffle of history,"
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"like my brother, uh, Martin."
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"Not Luther King."
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"Martin, uh--nigga didn't even have a last name,"
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"they erase this nigga so much."
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"And--and--and Tori. There's some more niggas."
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"I can't remember, bro. This protest shit is hard."
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"- You had a good run. - It was good while it lasted."
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"- We got a Black CEO now. - [chuckles]"
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"- So it looks like you really did change things around here."
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"- Oh, no, no, no. Ain't shit changed."
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"As a matter of fact, they gonna go back to the way they was."
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"- What? - I shouldn't have protested."
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"- I don't need y'all bugging out"
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"because Sam, look, I saw what you tried to do,"
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"trying to suck up off that rich Nigerian man."
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"- I do what I can."
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"- Man, you got more bitch in you than I thought."
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"[chuckles] - Fair."
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"- A lot more heart too. So you know what?"
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"I'm gonna run you a motherfuckin' promotion,"
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"you know what I'm saying, working my old job."
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"- Yo, that's fine. - Dog."
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"- Dude, congratulations! That's so dope!"
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"- No, no, no, no, no, no! This can't be happening."
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"No. No. That--that's it."
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"I'm gonna fucking kill myself!"
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"- Oh, don--no. Oh."
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"- [sobbing] - [cackles]"
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"Feel it. Feel the pain."
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"I won't let you pull out of this life just yet."
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"[cackles] - I just got a promotion."
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"Be happy for me. - Yeah."
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"- Watch yo hatin' ass. - You hatin', man."
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"Be happy for our nigga, man. She's getting money."
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"You getting money now. You a money motherfucker."
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"Which, you know what that means."
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"Come on, money motherfucker."
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"Give the money to the people, our people."
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"Oh, where am I going?"
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"Up top. Mm. - No!"
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"- Mm-hmm. What? Mm. - [cackles]"
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"- Oh!"
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"[upbeat music]"
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"- Are you throwing semen on me?"
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"- No I'm not throwing semen, girl."
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"I'm throwing justice. - I don't want this!"
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"- Justice! - Chris."
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"* *"
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