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Clips from Big Mouth (2017) - The Shane Lizard Rises (S05E05)

"Jesus, Jay. It looks like an anteater. And why is it bruised?"
Big Mouth (2017)
"If it's not bruised, you're not doin' it right."
Big Mouth (2017)
"-Maury, what are you doing? -I'm taking a picture for your spank bank."
Big Mouth (2017)
"Say "Dick cheese.""
Big Mouth (2017)
"Ugh! I don't want Jay's penis in my spank bank."
Big Mouth (2017)
"Yes. What would dear, sweet Aiden say?"
Big Mouth (2017)
"Nothing. Becuase I'm not attracted to Jay."
Big Mouth (2017)
"-Oh, yeah? -Or his battered dick."
Big Mouth (2017)
"Ooh! "Battered Dick" was the name of my college improv group."
Big Mouth (2017)
"-Really? -We did long-form. Everybody hated it."
Big Mouth (2017)
"-I'm sure. -I'm saving the photo."
Big Mouth (2017)
"What's the matter, Nick?"
Big Mouth (2017)
"You're quiet as a mouse."
Big Mouth (2017)
"Is it because you're hung like one? [laughs]"
Big Mouth (2017)
"Okay, you know what, I remember how to deal with you."
Big Mouth (2017)
"I just have to share my shame, and then I'll feel better."
Big Mouth (2017)
"Look, guys, let's not go crazy with this penis stuff."
Big Mouth (2017)
"I mean, I'm not afraid to say, I, Nick Birch, have a not very huge penis."
Big Mouth (2017)
"-Obviously. -Honey, everyone knows that."
Big Mouth (2017)
"Man, your dick makes us feel good about ours."
Big Mouth (2017)
"We talk about it when you're not around."
Big Mouth (2017)
"-Is that what you were hoping for? -No, it was not."
Big Mouth (2017)
"If it makes you feel any better, I have a tiny dick too."
Big Mouth (2017)
"Hey, man, we're the same!"
Big Mouth (2017)
"[sighs]"
Big Mouth (2017)
"Oh, my God!"
Big Mouth (2017)
"Go-Gurt Burglar's dick is huge!"
Big Mouth (2017)
"-Hot daddy! -[squealing]"
Big Mouth (2017)
"I know, on such a small frame, it, like, really pops."
Big Mouth (2017)
"Yeah, the only thing bigger is your camel toe."
Big Mouth (2017)
"-[girls gasp] -Excuse me?"
Big Mouth (2017)
"Devin, that's so fucked up!"
Big Mouth (2017)
"What? I-I'm trying to help her. She's got too much labia."
Big Mouth (2017)
"Devin!"
Big Mouth (2017)
"Women have to support other women by pointing out their flaws!"
Big Mouth (2017)
"You, madam, are a delight."
Big Mouth (2017)
"Oh, no! Is this the episode where I discover I don't have the perfect pussy?"
Big Mouth (2017)
"Yeah, well, that's what it says in the Netflix blurb."
Big Mouth (2017)
"Sigh, but like, go, Lola. In the blurb. [chuckles]"
Big Mouth (2017)
"Ladies, women, girl bosses,"
Big Mouth (2017)
"let's take a step back and remember who the real enemy is."
Big Mouth (2017)
"-The boys! -What did they do?"
Big Mouth (2017)
"They talked about my leg hair."
Big Mouth (2017)
"Yeah, because it's gross."
Big Mouth (2017)
"No offense, Jessi, but women need to shave."
Big Mouth (2017)
"No, we do not."
Big Mouth (2017)
"You'll get used to it, like deflecting compliments or laughing at guys' jokes."
Big Mouth (2017)
"-You know, girl stuff. -By the way, cute top."
Big Mouth (2017)
"It's cheap, and I'm ugly!"
Big Mouth (2017)
"I have to shave my whole body every day. It's like a full-time job."
Big Mouth (2017)
"Oh, my God. Are you serious?"
Big Mouth (2017)
"Yeah, I had to give up gymnastics, and I was really good. [chuckles, grunts]"
Big Mouth (2017)
"It seems like everybody's shaving except you, Jessi."
Big Mouth (2017)
"[sighs] Oy."
Big Mouth (2017)
"Oh, shit, we're gross."
Big Mouth (2017)
"Look at me! I'm covered in hair."
Big Mouth (2017)
"I'm gonna have to quit gymnastics, and I am not good."
Big Mouth (2017)
"[grunts, screams]"
Big Mouth (2017)
"Oh, so close."
Big Mouth (2017)
"Oh, Connie."
Big Mouth (2017)
"Oh, just give me the phone. I need to see what Devon saw."
Big Mouth (2017)
"I'm not sure you want to see this, darling."
Big Mouth (2017)
"[gasps] Oh, God!"
Big Mouth (2017)
"Missy, years from now, you'll look back on this moment…"
Big Mouth (2017)
"Yeah?"
Big Mouth (2017)
"…and be scarred, both physically and emotionally."
Big Mouth (2017)
"[groans] Oh!"
Big Mouth (2017)
"[laughs]"
Big Mouth (2017)
"Boom-shaka-laka! I'm en fuego!"
Big Mouth (2017)
"What's wrong, Nicky? You've barely touched your quinoa,"
Big Mouth (2017)
"and it's your favorite of the ancient grains."
Big Mouth (2017)
"Nothing, I'm fine."
Big Mouth (2017)
"-I bet he's worried about his small dick. -What the-- How'd he--"
Big Mouth (2017)
"I guess everyone really does talk about it when you're not around."
Big Mouth (2017)
"Mom, Leah, women don't really care about size, right?"
Big Mouth (2017)
"We're past that as a culture, right?"
Big Mouth (2017)
"Of course! Women want a loving, caring partner."
Big Mouth (2017)
"You know what your father always says."
Big Mouth (2017)
"It's not the size of the wave."
Big Mouth (2017)
"It's how well I perform cunnilingus on your mother."
Big Mouth (2017)
"[chuckles] It's true."
Big Mouth (2017)
"That's because his tongue is bigger than his dick."
Big Mouth (2017)
"[chuckles] Relax, Nick,"
Big Mouth (2017)
"guys care way more about penis size than girls do."
Big Mouth (2017)
"Exactly. For us, it's not a problem."
Big Mouth (2017)
"-Good. Good, good. -You know, unless it's a… problem."
Big Mouth (2017)
"Yeah, like a micropenis or something?"
Big Mouth (2017)
""Micropenis"? Oh, God, what's that?"
Big Mouth (2017)
"It's a very rare condition where your penis is medically small."
Big Mouth (2017)
"[laughs] You have a medically small penis."
Big Mouth (2017)
"-Oh, no! -Yes, you're Micropenis Boy!"
Big Mouth (2017)
"Ladies and gentlemen,"
Big Mouth (2017)
"step right up and giggle with glee."
Big Mouth (2017)
"-Stop! [groans] -The smallest wonder of the world…"
Big Mouth (2017)
"This boy's dick!"
Big Mouth (2017)
"-Stop! Argh! Don't look at me! -[laughter]"
Big Mouth (2017)
"There's nothing to see anyway!"
Big Mouth (2017)
"It's not that small!"
Big Mouth (2017)
"-[man] It is! -It's microscopic!"
Big Mouth (2017)
"Why, there's no balls!"
Big Mouth (2017)
"[chuckling] Oh, my God, that is…"
Big Mouth (2017)
"Whoo! But, like, in a bad way."
Big Mouth (2017)
"Jessi, please!"
Big Mouth (2017)
"I'll perform cunnilingus on you, like my dad does on my mom!"
Big Mouth (2017)
"-[jeering] -[man] Everybody knows"
Big Mouth (2017)
"women exclusively come from penetration."
Big Mouth (2017)
"[woman] You'll never be able to please a woman!"
Big Mouth (2017)
"No!"
Big Mouth (2017)
"Oh, God, everything about your dad makes me sad."
Big Mouth (2017)
"Why does he have a sleeping bag in the bathtub?"
Big Mouth (2017)
"I can't believe this is the only razor in our house."
Big Mouth (2017)
"It looks like someone killed a possum with it."
Big Mouth (2017)
"Oh, God. Maybe I should just wait?"
Big Mouth (2017)
"[Shame Wizard] Yes, good idea."
Big Mouth (2017)
"Best to let your leg hair grow longer and longer,"
Big Mouth (2017)
"until you become a Chewbacca!"
Big Mouth (2017)
"Argh!"
Big Mouth (2017)
"-[grunts] -Hey, fellas, we caught a Bigfoot!"
Big Mouth (2017)
"Aw, darn it, I was hoping for a sexy girl."
Big Mouth (2017)
"[garbled] But I am a sexy girl!"
Big Mouth (2017)
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