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Clips from MacGruber - Havencroft (S01E01)

"and then stabbin' him through the brain."
MacGruber
"- Hey, wait a second."
MacGruber
"How the hell did you survive"
MacGruber
"a gunshot point blank in the chest?"
MacGruber
"- That, my friend, was all Vicki."
MacGruber
"- Wow. What is that?"
MacGruber
"- That's a locket with Vicki's pubic hair in it."
MacGruber
"- Huh? - Yeah."
MacGruber
"- He literally dodged a bullet."
MacGruber
"- By the thinnest of hairs,"
MacGruber
"but there are some fake ones in there too."
MacGruber
"- Thanks."
MacGruber
"- Hey, Pipe, I'm gonna go grab another Molson."
MacGruber
"You want one? - You know it, Grubes."
MacGruber
"- You got it."
MacGruber
"- My locket has his pubic hair. Wanna see?"
MacGruber
"- Peekaboo."
MacGruber
"- Oh, my God. Mom."
MacGruber
"- Hello, MacGruber."
MacGruber
"Hey, know why Molson is my favorite beer?"
MacGruber
"- Why?"
MacGruber
"- Because it has the word "son" inside of it."
MacGruber
"- [laughs] Oh, you."
MacGruber
"Well, then you'll love Vicki,"
MacGruber
"because she also has your son inside of her."
MacGruber
"I mean, not right now."
MacGruber
"- [laughs] Oh, MacGruber."
MacGruber
"I've missed you so."
MacGruber
"- I've missed you so."
MacGruber
"But someday, we'll be together again."
MacGruber
"- Not for a while, because you're about to go"
MacGruber
"on the most important mission of your life."
MacGruber
"- What do you mean? What--"
MacGruber
"Mom. Mom? Mom!"
MacGruber
"- Ah, I love it, especially when"
MacGruber
"one little hair peeks out."
MacGruber
"It's like he's tickling me."
MacGruber
"- Ah, here you go, brother. - Thanks, Grubes."
MacGruber
"- Hard lemonade, Vick?"
MacGruber
"- Oh, no thanks."
MacGruber
"- I can't believe what I'm hearing here."
MacGruber
"This one's usually loves lemonade with vodka in it."
MacGruber
"What gives, Vick? Pussy."
MacGruber
"- What gives is,"
MacGruber
"I'm pregnant."
MacGruber
"- Oh, my God. - What?"
MacGruber
"- Congratulations. - What?"
MacGruber
"- I can't--oh, my!"
MacGruber
"- A little Gruber."
MacGruber
"[sentimental music]"
MacGruber
"- And the fatherless becomes the fatherer."
MacGruber
"Hey, you guys, let's all go celebrate and dance!"
MacGruber
"- Yeah! - Whoo-hoo."
MacGruber
"- * I got a good job I work hard for my money *"
MacGruber
"* When it's quittin' time I hit the door, honey *"
MacGruber
"* I fire up my pickup truck *"
MacGruber
"* And let the horses run *"
MacGruber
"[Brooks & Dunn's "Boot Scootin' Boogie"]"
MacGruber
"* I go flyin' down that highway *"
MacGruber
"* To that hide-a-way stuck out in the woods *"
MacGruber
"* To do the boot scootin' boogie *"
MacGruber
"* Yeah, heel, toe, do-si-do, *"
MacGruber
"* Come on baby let's go boot scootin' *"
MacGruber
"* *"
MacGruber
"* Oh, Cadillac, blackjack, baby meet me out back *"
MacGruber
"* We're gonna boogie *"
MacGruber
"* Oh, get down, turn around, go to town *"
MacGruber
"* Boot scootin boogie *"
MacGruber
"* *"
MacGruber
"* I said, get down turn around, go to town *"
MacGruber
"* Boot scootin' boogie *"
MacGruber
"* *"
MacGruber