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Clips from I Dream of Jeannie - Russian Roulette (S01E01)

Oh, it talks.

"Oh, it talks."

I Dream of Jeannie

l am at your command. You may have anything you wish.

"l am at your command. You may have anything you wish."

I Dream of Jeannie

l wish l don't drink so much vodka.

"l wish l don't drink so much vodka."

I Dream of Jeannie

-Who are you? -l am your genie.

"-Who are you? -l am your genie."

I Dream of Jeannie

Whoever has the bottle commands me.

"Whoever has the bottle commands me."

I Dream of Jeannie

lt's practical joke.

"lt's practical joke."

I Dream of Jeannie

lt is true.

"lt is true."

I Dream of Jeannie

l can grant you any wish.

"l can grant you any wish."

I Dream of Jeannie

Any wish?

"Any wish?"

I Dream of Jeannie

l test you. Make Captain Nelson kick General Barkley.

"l test you. Make Captain Nelson kick General Barkley."

I Dream of Jeannie

Oh, no, master. You would not want to do that.

"Oh, no, master. You would not want to do that."

I Dream of Jeannie

-Can you do it? -Well, of course l can.

"-Can you do it? -Well, of course l can."

I Dream of Jeannie

Do it.

"Do it."

I Dream of Jeannie

Oh, forgive me, ex-master.

"Oh, forgive me, ex-master."

I Dream of Jeannie

Yes, sir. Doctor, you can understand--

"Yes, sir. Doctor, you can understand--"

I Dream of Jeannie

You kicked a general?

"You kicked a general?"

I Dream of Jeannie

Well, no. No, l didn't, sir. Well, l--

"Well, no. No, l didn't, sir. Well, l--"

I Dream of Jeannie

l know it looked like l did, but l--

"l know it looked like l did, but l--"

I Dream of Jeannie

You see, it's the foot at the end of the leg.

"You see, it's the foot at the end of the leg."

I Dream of Jeannie

You see, l haven't been able to control it since l walked in space.

"You see, l haven't been able to control it since l walked in space."

I Dream of Jeannie

He did it.

"He did it."

I Dream of Jeannie

Just so l am sure, make him kick Dr. Bellows.

"Just so l am sure, make him kick Dr. Bellows."

I Dream of Jeannie

Oh, l'm sorry, ex-master.

"Oh, l'm sorry, ex-master."

I Dream of Jeannie

l was just--

"l was just--"

I Dream of Jeannie

Well, there goes that foot again.

"Well, there goes that foot again."

I Dream of Jeannie

Dr. Bellows, l want you to give this man a complete examination tomorrow.

"Dr. Bellows, l want you to give this man a complete examination tomorrow."

I Dream of Jeannie

And if there's nothing wrong with him, he's mine, all mine.

"And if there's nothing wrong with him, he's mine, all mine."

I Dream of Jeannie

-But, sir, l-- -Good night, captain.

"-But, sir, l-- -Good night, captain."

I Dream of Jeannie

Good night, sir.

"Good night, sir."

I Dream of Jeannie

Doctor, l'm sure there's an explanation.

"Doctor, l'm sure there's an explanation."

I Dream of Jeannie

Sonya. Hey, Sonya, wait. Wait a minute, Sonya.

"Sonya. Hey, Sonya, wait. Wait a minute, Sonya."

I Dream of Jeannie

Hey, let me in, huh?

"Hey, let me in, huh?"

I Dream of Jeannie

Tell you what. l'll give you $1 00 for the bottle.

"Tell you what. l'll give you $1 00 for the bottle."

I Dream of Jeannie

Sonya? Let me in.

"Sonya? Let me in."

I Dream of Jeannie

-You can do anything? -Anything.

"-You can do anything? -Anything."

I Dream of Jeannie

-Major! -Oh, boy, are we in business.

"-Major! -Oh, boy, are we in business."

I Dream of Jeannie

Yes, yes, thank you.

"Yes, yes, thank you."

I Dream of Jeannie

What do you mean, she's on her way to the airport?

"What do you mean, she's on her way to the airport?"

I Dream of Jeannie

Major Tiomkin wasn't scheduled to leave until tonight.

"Major Tiomkin wasn't scheduled to leave until tonight."

I Dream of Jeannie

Sergeant, why wasn't l informed about this change in plans?

"Sergeant, why wasn't l informed about this change in plans?"

I Dream of Jeannie

All right, all right. Never mind.

"All right, all right. Never mind."

I Dream of Jeannie

Jeannie, wherever you are...

"Jeannie, wherever you are..."

I Dream of Jeannie

...if you can do any moonlighting, grant me this one last favour:

"...if you can do any moonlighting, grant me this one last favour:"

I Dream of Jeannie

Get me to the airport on time. Sir.

"Get me to the airport on time. Sir."

I Dream of Jeannie

Now, captain, you and l are going to have a nice, long talk.

"Now, captain, you and l are going to have a nice, long talk."

I Dream of Jeannie

Could we talk a little later, sir? l'm on my way to the airport.

"Could we talk a little later, sir? l'm on my way to the airport."

I Dream of Jeannie

You're on your way to a court-martial...

"You're on your way to a court-martial..."

I Dream of Jeannie

...unless l have your full cooperation.

"...unless l have your full cooperation."

I Dream of Jeannie

Now, let's start at the beginning.

"Now, let's start at the beginning."

I Dream of Jeannie

As you know, captain, l've had you under observation for several months.

"As you know, captain, l've had you under observation for several months."

I Dream of Jeannie

l'll only be an hour. l'll be right back.

"l'll only be an hour. l'll be right back."

I Dream of Jeannie

To date, you've had hallucinations...

"To date, you've had hallucinations..."

I Dream of Jeannie

...you've heard voices...

"...you've heard voices..."

I Dream of Jeannie

...and now you seem to have a bottle fetish.

"...and now you seem to have a bottle fetish."

I Dream of Jeannie

For all these things, you've had dubious explanations.

"For all these things, you've had dubious explanations."

I Dream of Jeannie

-Half an hour? -But there is no explanation...

"-Half an hour? -But there is no explanation..."

I Dream of Jeannie

-...for striking a fellow officer. -No. l know that, sir.

"-...for striking a fellow officer. -No. l know that, sir."

I Dream of Jeannie

That is the ultimate in irrational behaviour.

"That is the ultimate in irrational behaviour."

I Dream of Jeannie

l know that.

"l know that."

I Dream of Jeannie

-Bless you. -You better watch that foot, doctor.

"-Bless you. -You better watch that foot, doctor."

I Dream of Jeannie

Flight 439 to Berlin, has it taken off yet?

"Flight 439 to Berlin, has it taken off yet?"

I Dream of Jeannie

There she goes.

"There she goes."

I Dream of Jeannie

We've lost. The Russians have the bottle.

"We've lost. The Russians have the bottle."

I Dream of Jeannie

Roger, will you forget about Jeannie?

"Roger, will you forget about Jeannie?"

I Dream of Jeannie

No, l mean, just consider her gone.

"No, l mean, just consider her gone."

I Dream of Jeannie

No, no, l mean really gone. For good.

"No, no, l mean really gone. For good."

I Dream of Jeannie

There's somebody at the door. l'll talk to you later.

"There's somebody at the door. l'll talk to you later."

I Dream of Jeannie

Yes, miss.

"Yes, miss."

I Dream of Jeannie

Sonya?

"Sonya?"

I Dream of Jeannie

Formerly Sonya Tiomkin. Now Betsy Ross.

"Formerly Sonya Tiomkin. Now Betsy Ross."

I Dream of Jeannie

-Betsy Ross? -Yes.

"-Betsy Ross? -Yes."

I Dream of Jeannie

This bottle made me what l always wanted to be:

"This bottle made me what l always wanted to be:"

I Dream of Jeannie

Wealthy American.

"Wealthy American."

I Dream of Jeannie

l think l understand.

"l think l understand."

I Dream of Jeannie

Well, well, welcome aboard, Betsy.

"Well, well, welcome aboard, Betsy."

I Dream of Jeannie

l can guess why you're here. You have everything you want...

"l can guess why you're here. You have everything you want..."

I Dream of Jeannie

-...and you wanted to return the bottle? -Yes, it's true.

"-...and you wanted to return the bottle? -Yes, it's true."

I Dream of Jeannie

l have villa on the Riviera, a mansion in Beverly Hills.

"l have villa on the Riviera, a mansion in Beverly Hills."

I Dream of Jeannie

My chauffeur's waiting outside in my Rolls Royce.

"My chauffeur's waiting outside in my Rolls Royce."

I Dream of Jeannie

But that's not everything l want.

"But that's not everything l want."

I Dream of Jeannie

-Yeah, what else is there? -You.

"-Yeah, what else is there? -You."

I Dream of Jeannie

-Me? -l'll make you a deal.

"-Me? -l'll make you a deal."

I Dream of Jeannie

You marry me, l give you bottle.

"You marry me, l give you bottle."

I Dream of Jeannie

Marry you? Well-- Well, l can't marry you.

"Marry you? Well-- Well, l can't marry you."

I Dream of Jeannie

l mean, well, l want Jeannie back desperately...

"l mean, well, l want Jeannie back desperately..."

I Dream of Jeannie

-...but marriage is out of the question. -Too bad.

"-...but marriage is out of the question. -Too bad."

I Dream of Jeannie

You, me and bottle could have had the world.

"You, me and bottle could have had the world."

I Dream of Jeannie

Yeah, please...

"Yeah, please..."

I Dream of Jeannie

...at least may l say goodbye to Jeannie?

"...at least may l say goodbye to Jeannie?"

I Dream of Jeannie

Why not? But no tricks.

"Why not? But no tricks."

I Dream of Jeannie

All right. No tricks.

"All right. No tricks."

I Dream of Jeannie

Oh, ex-master, darling.

"Oh, ex-master, darling."

I Dream of Jeannie

l thought l would never see you again.

"l thought l would never see you again."

I Dream of Jeannie

l thought l'd never see you again either, Jeannie.

"l thought l'd never see you again either, Jeannie."

I Dream of Jeannie

-There's so much l want to say. -There's so much l want to hear.

"-There's so much l want to say. -There's so much l want to hear."

I Dream of Jeannie

Betsy-- Sonya.

"Betsy-- Sonya."

I Dream of Jeannie

May l speak to Jeannie alone, please?

"May l speak to Jeannie alone, please?"

I Dream of Jeannie

All right. But l keep bottle here.

"All right. But l keep bottle here."

I Dream of Jeannie

Hurry it up. l want her to tell me who wins daily double...

"Hurry it up. l want her to tell me who wins daily double..."

I Dream of Jeannie

-...at Hialeah tomorrow. -Yeah.

"-...at Hialeah tomorrow. -Yeah."

I Dream of Jeannie

l'm gonna miss you terribly, Jeannie.

"l'm gonna miss you terribly, Jeannie."

I Dream of Jeannie

Oh, and l'm going to miss you, master.

"Oh, and l'm going to miss you, master."

I Dream of Jeannie

l never realized just how much l'd miss you until this happened.

"l never realized just how much l'd miss you until this happened."

I Dream of Jeannie

-You would like me to stay? -Of course l--

"-You would like me to stay? -Of course l--"

I Dream of Jeannie

-You mean, you could? -lf she frees me.

"-You mean, you could? -lf she frees me."

I Dream of Jeannie

Well, you heard what she said.

"Well, you heard what she said."

I Dream of Jeannie

She's not gonna free you, and-- l can't marry her, Jeannie.

"She's not gonna free you, and-- l can't marry her, Jeannie."

I Dream of Jeannie

lf you want to keep me, you must.

"lf you want to keep me, you must."

I Dream of Jeannie

Sonya, l've changed my mind.

"Sonya, l've changed my mind."

I Dream of Jeannie

lf you haven't changed yours, l'll marry you.

"lf you haven't changed yours, l'll marry you."

I Dream of Jeannie

Darling, l'm going to make you very happy.

"Darling, l'm going to make you very happy."

I Dream of Jeannie

We'll fly to Mexico. We'll be married before sunup.

"We'll fly to Mexico. We'll be married before sunup."

I Dream of Jeannie

Oh, wonderful!

"Oh, wonderful!"

I Dream of Jeannie

And we can leave that there.

"And we can leave that there."

I Dream of Jeannie

Anything you say, darling.

"Anything you say, darling."

I Dream of Jeannie

Stay there.

"Stay there."

I Dream of Jeannie

What's gonna happen when she finds out...

"What's gonna happen when she finds out..."

I Dream of Jeannie

...she's married a phony Tony?

"...she's married a phony Tony?"

I Dream of Jeannie

l do not care, master, darling, as long as l have the real one.

"l do not care, master, darling, as long as l have the real one."

I Dream of Jeannie