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Clips from The Office - Customer Survey (S05E05)

"Yes, Michael."
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"Would you hold on one second?"
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"- No--But i-- - Hello."
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"Yeah."
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"No, i'm just on the phone with this stupid salesman."
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"He's so dumb."
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"I'm probably just gonna keep him on the line forever"
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"Yeah, okay."
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"Sorry."
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"That was a family emergency."
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"Oh, no. What's wrong?"
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"You know what, that's private."
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"Boundaries, dwight. Come on!"
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"I'm sorry, mr. Buttlicker."
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"As i was saying,"
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"- we're having a limited-- - Sorry,you're gonna have to speak up"
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"I'm hard of hearing."
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"Okay, as i was saying, right now"
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"- Never been lower. - Louder, son!"
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"Buttlicker, our prices have never been lower!"
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"- OK!Stop it! - He--"
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"That is totally inappropriate."
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"- You never yell at the client. - Now, you listen to me,sir."
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"The three words I would describe you as"
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"- Please, mr. Buttlicker. - I'm irate right now!"
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"- Give me the phone. - Please give me another chance."
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"- Give me the phone.Give me the phone. - Mr. Buttlicker--"
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"Well,I should hope so."
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"Who is this?"
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"Well, this is William m. Buttlicker."
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"Hello, mr. Buttlicker. How may we help you?"
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"I'm gonna buy $1 million worth of paper products today."
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"Yeah!"
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"See how it's done?"
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"Thank you very much, sir."
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"- See what i did? - You are the master."
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"You have to fire the salesman that treated me so terribly."
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"Don't do it,Michael."
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"It's a million-Dollar sale."
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"So it's called the shangri-La tent."
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"And it has a bridal suite for my bridalal sweet."
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"I don't want to be married in a tent like a hobo."
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"Hobos live in trains."
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"Nana Mimi can't be in canvas that long."
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"And it's in high demand,"
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"so i really think We should put a deposit down now."
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"Okay, fine."
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"You can have your tent,"
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"A hand-Plowed field."
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"And antique tools to look at when you roll over."
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"No."
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"But anything within a five to eight-Mile radius is acceptable."
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"On it!"
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"Dwight."
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"- Are you serious? - Get in!"
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"- They might be listening to us. - What's that?"
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"- They might be listening to us! - Who's "they"?"
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"Customer service might be monitoring this conversation."
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"In this car?"
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"You never know. Better safe than sorry."
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"What are you thinking of?"
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"Who stands to benefit from our downfall?"
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"Could be the mob."
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"But then Dunder Mifflin would need to be a front for money laundering,"
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"And there's little evidence of that."
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"Is there some evidence?"
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"How many shoes do you need?"
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"I don't know. Two?"
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"Maybe three, if one wears out."
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"Who are you talking to?"
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"No, she's not."
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"Yes!"
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"I found it. I found the perfect place."
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"And even better, i have an in with the owner."
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"- I'm sorry? - Shh!"
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"Do you hear that?"
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"Is that you? Well, i am breathing, yes."
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"Well, stop. Hold your breath."
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"Kelly, is that you?"
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"Hold on."
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"I need paper."
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"What are you talking about?"
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"What are you up to, girl? Huh?"
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"Of course I am. I know you're the mastermind."
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"But you're too stupid to do it by yourself."
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"- Okay... - oh!"
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"You just can't come into my nook and call me stupid."
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"And maybe it you were a little bit more nice and polite,"
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"Then people wouldn't give you such bad customer reviews."
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"Okay, the reason that i got bad customer reviews"
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"There is a massive conspiracy going on here,"
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"And i know you're involved."
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"Dwight, get out of my nook!"
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"That's what she said! That's what she said!"
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"That's what she said!"
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"Good one."
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"Sorry about dwight, by the way."
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"I personally choose to handle it like a normal person, but..."
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"Hey, how are you and Darryl?"
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"Um, we're cool. Bye."
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"That was weird."
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"What was?"
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"Have you ever had a conversation with kelly"
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"No, actually."
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"Hey, how's things?"
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"- All right. - Yeah?"
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"Oh,I don't play the politics game anymore,Jim."
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"- I played it full-On in new york. - Mm-Hmm."
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"Made it to the top."
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"Wait, that's pretty weird."
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"Her America's Got Talent finale party Over the summer."
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"That's crazy. It was packed."
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"Hey, do you know anything about this party?"
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"Yes,I said you definitely should go,"
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"But you wanted to visit me instead."
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"Let me see your coffee cup."
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"- Is that it? - No. Why?"
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"Okay, i'm gonna assume that was it."
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"Here's the thing. I think you're right."
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"I think it was Kelly."
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