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Clips from Little Demon - First Blood (S01E01)

"PARTY GUEST 4: This party just got lame."
Little Demon
"- Deceiver, dark one,"
Little Demon
"thou shall be cast into..."
Little Demon
"[emotionally] Wow, sorry."
Little Demon
"It's like, you stand here"
Little Demon
"holding the ceremonial knife with this Antichrist--"
Little Demon
"PARTY GUEST 5: Who gives a shit?"
Little Demon
"- I do."
Little Demon
"And I am your final judgment."
Little Demon
"[gunshot] [crowd gasping]"
Little Demon
"- [moaning]"
Little Demon
"Why?"
Little Demon
"DEVIL: Comedy. [gunshot]"
Little Demon
"- Get your hands off my daughter."
Little Demon
"DEVIL: Our daughter. - Oh, great."
Little Demon
"My parents are here."
Little Demon
"- Hi, honey. I'm a chicken now."
Little Demon
"[clucking]"
Little Demon
"[sinister music]"
Little Demon
"♪ ♪"
Little Demon
"[gunshot]"
Little Demon
"♪ ♪"
Little Demon
"[gunshot] HENCHMAN 1: [groans]"
Little Demon
"[gunshot] HENCHMAN 2: Ow!"
Little Demon
"[gunshot] HENCHMAN 3: Aah!"
Little Demon
"[gunshot] HENCHMAN 4: Oh!"
Little Demon
"HENCHMAN 5: I'm bleeding, I'm bleeding."
Little Demon
"[gunshots]"
Little Demon
"- Really, that's all you got?"
Little Demon
"- I made a dozen guys shoot their dicks off."
Little Demon
"PARTY GUEST 6: And one vagina!"
Little Demon
"- [grunts]"
Little Demon
"[laughs] Whoo!"
Little Demon
"Now, we're having fun."
Little Demon
"- We're like The Incredibles but gross."
Little Demon
"- With my last breath, let-- - [grunt]"
Little Demon
"- I will get my revenge. You shall pay!"
Little Demon
"Has anyone seen the tip of my dick?"
Little Demon
"PARTY GUEST: If my parents ever show up to a party,"
Little Demon
"murder me with a knife."
Little Demon
"- What is middle school"
Little Demon
"but Sisyphus pretending to love the boulder?"
Little Demon
"See you at the bottom of the hill tomorrow, new girl."
Little Demon
"- That was so deep. - My sister had Sisyphus."
Little Demon
"- See you tomorrow!"
Little Demon
"Boy, did we have a meet-weird, right?"
Little Demon
"Like it was a meet-cute,"
Little Demon
"but it was weird 'cause of all the carnage!"
Little Demon
"- Chrissy, are you hurt?"
Little Demon
"- Don't worry. Daddy's here."
Little Demon
"- Oh, I'll show you what I do to Daddy."
Little Demon
"- Just fucking stop it!"
Little Demon
"This was the worst day of my life,"
Little Demon
"and it was because of you two self-centered assholes."
Little Demon
"If you want your sire and seed or whatever"
Little Demon
"and you actually want a daughter,"
Little Demon
"know that I'm calling the shots now."
Little Demon
"Got it? Got it?"
Little Demon
"- Yeah, got it. Cool your jets. - Yeah, fine. We got it."
Little Demon
"- Mom, I'm going to school tomorrow."
Little Demon
"No more running."
Little Demon
"And, Dad, I don't trust you,"
Little Demon
"but I want to get to know you, but slowly,"
Little Demon
"like every other weekend."
Little Demon
"- Every other? That's a little weak."
Little Demon
"- God damn it!"
Little Demon
"- We got time to negotiate."
Little Demon
"Now, who wants pancakes?"
Little Demon
"[gunshot] [clucks]"
Little Demon
"[air hissing]"
Little Demon
"- Well, now you've met your father."
Little Demon
"DEVIL: No, not yet."
Little Demon
"Her mother's stronger than I thought."
Little Demon
"But hey, who cares?"
Little Demon
"My daughter's gonna join me soon,"
Little Demon
"and then I'll be top shit for eternity."
Little Demon
"But I just got to be patient, you know?"
Little Demon
"And I'm a patient guy."
Little Demon
"I wrote the book on patience."
Little Demon
"Got all the time in the world."
Little Demon
"[dramatic musical sting]"
Little Demon
"[eerie musical sting]"
Little Demon
"- Just wanted to let you know that I left some sanitary pads"
Little Demon
"near where the bathroom sink used to be."
Little Demon
"[clears throat]"
Little Demon
"Oh, and hey, that thing I said about my life being ruined,"
Little Demon
"I was a mess before I had you."
Little Demon
"That's sort of how I had you,"
Little Demon
"so yeah, you didn't ruin anything."
Little Demon
"You made me better, okay?"
Little Demon
"I love you. Night."
Little Demon
"- [scoffs]"
Little Demon
"[ominous music]"
Little Demon
"♪ ♪"
Little Demon
"LAURA: My little baby girl is all grown up."
Little Demon
"Time for Mama to grow up too."
Little Demon
"No more running."
Little Demon
"IRWIN: I never thought I'd hear"
Little Demon
"the Laura Feinberg say those words."
Little Demon
"- Oh, it is creepy when you come out"
Little Demon
"of the shadows like that, Irwin."
Little Demon
"- I don't control the lighting in here."
Little Demon
"You do. LAURA: You know,"
Little Demon
"maybe Mama wasn't running from the Devil."
Little Demon
"Maybe Mama was running from being a real mama."
Little Demon
"- Uh, okay."
Little Demon
"So if Mama's not running, what's next on the docket?"
Little Demon
"LAURA: I don't know."
Little Demon
"What do people do in the suburbs anyway, huh?"
Little Demon
"Rake leaves? Start book clubs?"
Little Demon
"Walk into the ocean and drown themselves?"
Little Demon
"I mean..."
Little Demon
"- Hey. You want to watch Con Air?"
Little Demon
"- You read Mama's mind."
Little Demon
"["Be Thankful You're You" by Fern Jones]"
Little Demon
"SINGER: ♪ And know that ♪"
Little Demon
"♪ Your talents are few ♪"
Little Demon
"♪ Just use the one talent ♪"
Little Demon
"♪ On you he bestowed ♪"
Little Demon
"♪ Be thankful ♪"
Little Demon
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