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Clips from Workaholics - Wedding Thrashers (S05E05)

TV Series 2011–2017 Season 5, Episode 9 22 min ★ 8.1/10 (59,513 ratings) 555 clips
Comedy
You know, the reason it's called "bullseye"
"You know, the reason it's called "bullseye""
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is because in early Spain,
"is because in early Spain,"
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they'd throw darts in the bulls' eyes,
"they'd throw darts in the bulls' eyes,"
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and that would make them run, and then
"and that would make them run, and then"
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- running of the bulls, so... - Wow.
"- running of the bulls, so... - Wow."
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- That makes sense. - Crazy, huh?
"- That makes sense. - Crazy, huh?"
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Blake, you might be the best
"Blake, you might be the best"
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at making facts up, and I mean that.
"at making facts up, and I mean that."
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It's true, I saw it on History Channel.
"It's true, I saw it on History Channel."
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- You're up. - No, I can't. I threw out my back last night
"- You're up. - No, I can't. I threw out my back last night"
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fussing my Fleshlight.
"fussing my Fleshlight."
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- That shouldn't happen. - Oh, that'll happen.
"- That shouldn't happen. - Oh, that'll happen."
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What sucks is I can't even afford the back-upuncture to fix it.
"What sucks is I can't even afford the back-upuncture to fix it."
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- It's like ObamaCare, right? - Tell me about it.
"- It's like ObamaCare, right? - Tell me about it."
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Unless...
"Unless..."
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All right. Hum it in.
"All right. Hum it in."
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Hum it in right here. Dart me down, my brother.
"Hum it in right here. Dart me down, my brother."
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I don't know if this is...
"I don't know if this is..."
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I could sever your spine or something, right?
"I could sever your spine or something, right?"
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No, there's too much meat around it.
"No, there's too much meat around it."
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Oh, yeah, and then he could have a cool Professor X wheelchair.
"Oh, yeah, and then he could have a cool Professor X wheelchair."
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You guys need to chill out. Back-upuncture,
"You guys need to chill out. Back-upuncture,"
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It's just needles, correct?
"It's just needles, correct?"
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And what are darts but wing-ed needles?
"And what are darts but wing-ed needles?"
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Okay? So just clip it in some beer and disinfect it
"Okay? So just clip it in some beer and disinfect it"
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and then hum it in there!
"and then hum it in there!"
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Yep. Uh... On three.
"Yep. Uh... On three."
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- Whoo! - One... Two...
"- Whoo! - One... Two..."
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- Three! - You know what, on second thought...
"- Three! - You know what, on second thought..."
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MAN: Oh! Ahhh! What the hell?
"MAN: Oh! Ahhh! What the hell?"
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Did you just throw that dart?
"Did you just throw that dart?"
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(STAMMERING) Nah. Hell, no!
"(STAMMERING) Nah. Hell, no!"
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I got a dart hanging outta my face!
"I got a dart hanging outta my face!"
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Yes, you do. But look at it this way,
"Yes, you do. But look at it this way,"
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we just saved you a trip to Claire's, am I right?
"we just saved you a trip to Claire's, am I right?"
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(LAUGHING)
"(LAUGHING)"
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- 'Cause... - No?
"- 'Cause... - No?"
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That's it. You're dead!
"That's it. You're dead!"
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I'm fresh
"I'm fresh"
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You gotta, you gotta, you gotta, gotta
"You gotta, you gotta, you gotta, gotta"
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Gotta be fresh
"Gotta be fresh"
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- Whoa... - Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa!
"- Whoa... - Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa!"
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- You guys gotta go. - Get 'em outta here!
"- You guys gotta go. - Get 'em outta here!"
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Hey, hey, easy, easy. Keith, they're with me.
"Hey, hey, easy, easy. Keith, they're with me."
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KEITH: Sorry about that, Hilary.
"KEITH: Sorry about that, Hilary."
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Just let me know if you need anything.
"Just let me know if you need anything."
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Uh, well, how about a round of lemon drops for us?
"Uh, well, how about a round of lemon drops for us?"
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And put all of dart face's drinks on my tab.
"And put all of dart face's drinks on my tab."
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How 'bout some chicken fingers?
"How 'bout some chicken fingers?"
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Yeah. Well, whatever you want.
"Yeah. Well, whatever you want."
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(CHUCKLING) Sick.
"(CHUCKLING) Sick."
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Okay.
"Okay."
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Thank you for saving us with that guy.
"Thank you for saving us with that guy."
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- Yeah. - Actually, you kinda saved him
"- Yeah. - Actually, you kinda saved him"
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from us, 'cause I would have tae kwon do kicked him
"from us, 'cause I would have tae kwon do kicked him"
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right in the freakin' tummy,
"right in the freakin' tummy,"
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probably made him dump out in his pants.
"probably made him dump out in his pants."
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Yep. Just poop all over himself.
"Yep. Just poop all over himself."
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Yeah, like Hong Kong Pooey.
"Yeah, like Hong Kong Pooey."
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Very funny word play.
"Very funny word play."
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- Oh, that's very funny! - Points, points.
"- Oh, that's very funny! - Points, points."
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- Thanks. - That's awesome,
"- Thanks. - That's awesome,"
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because normally women aren't funny,
"because normally women aren't funny,"
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- and that's a rule. - Here you go, Miss Winthrop.
"- and that's a rule. - Here you go, Miss Winthrop."
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- Thanks. - All right.
"- Thanks. - All right."
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And we're working on those tenders and those dipping sauces.
"And we're working on those tenders and those dipping sauces."
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- Thanks, man. - Cheers, guys.
"- Thanks, man. - Cheers, guys."
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- Cheers. - Thank you.
"- Cheers. - Thank you."
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- I finished first. - I'm sorry.
"- I finished first. - I'm sorry."
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Did he say Miss Winthrop, as in...
"Did he say Miss Winthrop, as in..."
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Ted Winthrop?
"Ted Winthrop?"
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Yeah, yeah, that's my dad.
"Yeah, yeah, that's my dad."
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- I'm Hilary. This is my friend Jackie. - Hi. Yeah, no...
"- I'm Hilary. This is my friend Jackie. - Hi. Yeah, no..."
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Your dad's the king of Rancho!
"Your dad's the king of Rancho!"
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- Oh... - Right? I mean...
"- Oh... - Right? I mean..."
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Garbage trucks, gas stations, Payless shoe stores.
"Garbage trucks, gas stations, Payless shoe stores."
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Yep.
"Yep."
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BLAKE: Yeah, that's right! The big three, huh?
"BLAKE: Yeah, that's right! The big three, huh?"
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I'm sure Obama picks up his phone calls pretty quick.
"I'm sure Obama picks up his phone calls pretty quick."
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If Obama would ever pick up the damn phone!
"If Obama would ever pick up the damn phone!"
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Keep the change!
"Keep the change!"
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I didn't vote.
"I didn't vote."
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Who votes? Do you guys want to get some more drinks?
"Who votes? Do you guys want to get some more drinks?"
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Then we'll party a little bit?
"Then we'll party a little bit?"
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- Yes! - Whoo!
"- Yes! - Whoo!"
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- Yes! - And some dipping sauces.
"- Yes! - And some dipping sauces."
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(I FINK U FREEKY BY DIE ANTVVOORD PLAYING)
"(I FINK U FREEKY BY DIE ANTVVOORD PLAYING)"
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I think you're freaky and I like you a lot
"I think you're freaky and I like you a lot"
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I think you're freaky and I like you a lot
"I think you're freaky and I like you a lot"
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(DISTORTED VOICE) Whoa!
"(DISTORTED VOICE) Whoa!"
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I think you're freaky and I like you a lot
"I think you're freaky and I like you a lot"
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Oh, my God! I did that to a real girl!
"Oh, my God! I did that to a real girl!"
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- We shut it down. - Tonight was really fun, guys.
"- We shut it down. - Tonight was really fun, guys."
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I had so much fun with you!
"I had so much fun with you!"
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Oh, God, you smell like puke.
"Oh, God, you smell like puke."
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- Do I? - Yeah.
"- Do I? - Yeah."
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It's just my armpit.
"It's just my armpit."
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- (LAUGHTING) - (ADAM SHOUTING)
"- (LAUGHTING) - (ADAM SHOUTING)"
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- No, no, no, no, no! - Stop, dude.
"- No, no, no, no, no! - Stop, dude."
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This might be a little crazy, but...
"This might be a little crazy, but..."
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I'm going to my sister's wedding this weekend,
"I'm going to my sister's wedding this weekend,"
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and I was wondering
"and I was wondering"
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if maybe you'd want to be my date.
"if maybe you'd want to be my date."
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I do...
"I do..."
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Want to go with you,
"Want to go with you,"
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my sweet mistress or lady or...
"my sweet mistress or lady or..."
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- My sweet lady! - (ALL LAUGHING)
"- My sweet lady! - (ALL LAUGHING)"
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Well, you guys, you guys are totally invited too.
"Well, you guys, you guys are totally invited too."
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Oh, tight! Yes, I do.
"Oh, tight! Yes, I do."
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- BLAKE: That's sick! - Well, uh...
"- BLAKE: That's sick! - Well, uh..."
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We'll see you there.
"We'll see you there."
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Okay, bye.
"Okay, bye."
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Hilary, wait.
"Hilary, wait."
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- Hmm? - I never caught your name.
"- Hmm? - I never caught your name."
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Um, I think... I think you did, 'cause you, well, you just said it.
"Um, I think... I think you did, 'cause you, well, you just said it."
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- Yeah, I know, I know. - Okay!
"- Yeah, I know, I know. - Okay!"
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No, I remember! All right.
"No, I remember! All right."
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- HILARY: Okay, I'll see you there. - All right, later. See you soon.
"- HILARY: Okay, I'll see you there. - All right, later. See you soon."
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Yeah, later, Silary.
"Yeah, later, Silary."
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- Take care. - This is 'bout to be dope.
"- Take care. - This is 'bout to be dope."
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