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Clips from Paper Girls - Growing Pains (S01E01)

"- [Mac] Come on, hurry up. - [Tiff] Go, move it."
Paper Girls
"[rumbling]"
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"What's going on?"
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"All right, come on, my house isn't far."
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"Move, move! Let's get out of here!"
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"Go faster."
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"- Mac, where's your phone? - Just let me think. Just let me think."
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"Why does the sky look like that?"
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"[Tiff] Calm down, everybody."
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"[Mac] All right."
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"What are you doing?"
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"Nothing."
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"- Okay. New Girl, sit. - [Erin] Did you guys..."
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"You guys saw the sky, right?"
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"[Tiff] There's no power."
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"[Mac] Dylan?"
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"Dad?"
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"- Maybe they're at work? - [Mac] What?"
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"No. No, the factory's not open yet."
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"My brother couldn't get hired to dig a ditch."
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"Are these yours?"
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"[Mac] Whatever."
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"Not all of us get to live in a JCPenney catalog."
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"[Tiff] I didn't mean to..."
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"Yeah, whatever. This is weird."
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"My dad doesn't go anywhere without his smokes."
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"Maybe everybody has already been evacuated."
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"That's standard procedure when there's a nuclear attack."
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"We don't know there's a nuclear attack."
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"You think it could be aliens?"
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"I'm just saying we don't know."
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"Where my walkie?"
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"[crackles, whines]"
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"[man speaking foreign language]"
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"- What the heck language is that? - I think it's Russian."
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"- That's not funny. - Come on."
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"I'm not trying to be funny."
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"Okay, guys, something is seriously wrong here."
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"I know this is gonna sound insane,"
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"but did anyone see any actual people on our ride over here?"
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"Come on, it's "fuck you o'clock" early in the morning."
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"No, no, she's right. 'Cause, come to think of it,"
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"I didn't see cars moving, either."
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"Did you?"
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"No."
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"I..."
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"- I have to go. - [Mac] What?"
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"- [KJ] Whoa. Hey. - [Mac] Sorry, kid. Not an option."
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"We have no fucking idea what's going on"
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"out there, and I'm not coming out"
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"to save you when shit hits the fan."
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"All right, Mac. Take it easy on her. Jesus."
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"Make me."
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"You don't understand, okay? It's..."
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"I can't wait."
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"My mom-my mom can't even go to the bank by herself."
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"I'm not like you guys."
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"People need me."
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"- [scoffs] The fuck's that supposed to mean? - Yeah."
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"I'm-I'm sorry, I didn't mean that."
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"It's just..."
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"Her English."
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"- If it is some kind of... - Invasion."
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"...emergency, she's not gonna understand, okay?"
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"Now let me go."
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"Whoa. No. New Girl, I'm sorry. No. But Mac is right."
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"The best thing to do is stay put."
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"- Duck and cover. - Tiffany."
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"Then it's decided."
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"Nobody in."
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"- [door locks] - Nobody out."
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"We wait here."
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"Well, if it is some kind of invasion,"
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"at least I don't have to wear that dumb dress"
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"my mom bought for my bat mitzvah."
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"[chuckles]"
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"The hell is a bat mitzvah?"
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"[KJ, Erin and Tiffany laugh]"
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"Don't worry about it."
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"[Tiff] I've only been doing this a year,"
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"- but the stories I could tell you. - [Erin] No way."
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"Worse than baseball bat guy thinking I stole his paper?"
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"Way worse."
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"Like this one time, I went to collect over on Marion."
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"Guy's a longtime subscriber for, like, ever."
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"I ring the doorbell, get my whole spiel ready,"
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"and when the door swings open, he's completely naked."
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"- [scoffs] - No underwear or anything?"
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"- Butt naked. - That's gross. God. - [all laugh]"
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"Turns out he had somnambulism."
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"Is that contagious?"
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"No. It-It's sleepwalking."
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"- Oh. - [Tiff] He was asleep the whole time."
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"[KJ] Hmm."
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"- Guess his subscription got canceled. - [laughs] Sure did."
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"- [all laugh] - [Mac] Dude, that's nothing."
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"You know, when I first started,"
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"there was this bunch of younger guys"
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"who'd get off the overnight shift"
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"at the factory, and they'd throw, like,"
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"full cans of beer at me on Amherst."
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"- That's messed up. - [Mac] So messed up."
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"It was a total waste of good beer."
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"[all chuckle]"
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"Here. Have some."
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"- Where'd you get that? - Thanks."
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"We hand them out every year for Halloween."
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"Full size?"
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"My family only hands out the little ones."
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"Yeah."
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"My mom's trying to make our neighbors like us."
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"Our neighbors don't really like us."
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"[KJ] I like you."
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"- Same. - Think fast."
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"[KJ, Erin and Tiffany laugh]"
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"Nice throw, dipshit."
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"Nice reflexes."
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"Thank you."
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"[Mac sighs]"
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"[high-pitched, wavering tone]"
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