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Clips from Human Resources (2022) - It's Almost Over (S01E01)

"No, look, Amir doesn't have time for hugs, he has an ailing mother to take care of."
Human Resources (2022)
"Don't I know it?"
Human Resources (2022)
"-And again, I am so, so sorry to hear-- -Yeah, we don't need your pity."
Human Resources (2022)
"Oh, no, no, no. I'm Keith from Grief."
Human Resources (2022)
"You're thinking of Schmitty from Pity."
Human Resources (2022)
"A lovely creature, albeit, at times, a little condescending."
Human Resources (2022)
"I don't want oatmeal!"
Human Resources (2022)
"I'm sorry, Keith, but now is really not a good time."
Human Resources (2022)
"Pete, it's not a good idea to ignore me."
Human Resources (2022)
"Mama, no! Ugh! You got Kashi all over my Calvin's!"
Human Resources (2022)
"Why can't we just give her candy?"
Human Resources (2022)
"All she's doing is saying what she wants, but no one in this house gives a shit!"
Human Resources (2022)
"Walter, you need to calm down."
Human Resources (2022)
"And you need to start freaking out!"
Human Resources (2022)
"-The Lovebug's got a point. -Good granite, Keith!"
Human Resources (2022)
"-I'm sorry, but who the fuck is this? -Oh, hi. Keith from Grief."
Human Resources (2022)
"I'm here to help this lovely family start the mourning process."
Human Resources (2022)
"Uh-uh! We are not mourning, honey, we are thriving."
Human Resources (2022)
"Of course! Denial. First stage. Very normal."
Human Resources (2022)
"Listen, Keith from queef, nobody wants you here,"
Human Resources (2022)
"so why don't you make like a "treef" and leaf?"
Human Resources (2022)
"-I will fuck you up. -Excuse me?"
Human Resources (2022)
"Oh! See? Now you're experiencing anger."
Human Resources (2022)
"Second stage. Again, perfectly normal."
Human Resources (2022)
"Okay, Keith from Grief, what do we have to do to get you to leaf?"
Human Resources (2022)
"And there it is, stage three. Bargaining."
Human Resources (2022)
"We've almost got a grief bingo."
Human Resources (2022)
"I'm about to bargain my foot up your whole ass."
Human Resources (2022)
"-Okay, let's go, Keith."
Human Resources (2022)
"We don't have the time or inclination to be sad today."
Human Resources (2022)
"I-- I just want to make sure you both have my card."
Human Resources (2022)
"My mantra is on there, "The only way out is through.""
Human Resources (2022)
"That is a shitty mantra, Keith!"
Human Resources (2022)
"Oh, also, that card is good for 5% off at Kohl's,"
Human Resources (2022)
"the official retail chain of grief."
Human Resources (2022)
"Oh, okay, um, I am gonna take this,"
Human Resources (2022)
"but only 'cause I need to get my nephew some Super Mario Skechers."
Human Resources (2022)
"Okay? That's the only reason why."
Human Resources (2022)
"So I heard Rochelle has a fungus in her butt and her pussy,"
Human Resources (2022)
"which apparently you can only get by fucking an unflushed public toilet."
Human Resources (2022)
"So if you wanted to call her maybe "Toilet Fucker"--"
Human Resources (2022)
"That sounds like you're starting a rumor. I don't want to get involved."
Human Resources (2022)
"Between you and me, that's what the toilet said."
Human Resources (2022)
"Oh, hi. Nice of you to join us."
Human Resources (2022)
"Yeah, it is nice of me,"
Human Resources (2022)
"because I didn't wanna come."
Human Resources (2022)
"Where's Walter?"
Human Resources (2022)
"Oh, Walter's part of the A-story this episode."
Human Resources (2022)
"He left Rochelle in charge."
Human Resources (2022)
"Oh, yeah. Of course he did."
Human Resources (2022)
"And what exactly is that supposed to mean?"
Human Resources (2022)
"Uh, just that everyone's convinced you're so great"
Human Resources (2022)
"and weirdly unwilling to believe that you'd make hard love to a toilet."
Human Resources (2022)
"Well, maybe they'll ask you to lead the meeting"
Human Resources (2022)
"when it's about how to humiliate yourself on a global scale."
Human Resources (2022)
"Maybe they will! I hope they do!"
Human Resources (2022)
"Okay, ladies, we all know what happened at the International Creature Convention."
Human Resources (2022)
"Rochelle gave Dolly Parton a kidney, but Emmy wanted the kidney for herself,"
Human Resources (2022)
"so you turned to blackmailing each other."
Human Resources (2022)
"-What? No. -That's not at all what happened."
Human Resources (2022)
"Exactly! It doesn't matter what happened because we're Lovebugs!"
Human Resources (2022)
"Bugs who love!"
Human Resources (2022)
"So, come on, let's show this office how it's done. Yeah?"
Human Resources (2022)
"So, like what?"
Human Resources (2022)
"Hug each other!"
Human Resources (2022)
"Oh, I-- I don't think that's necessary."
Human Resources (2022)
"-Would you ask guys to do this? -Of course I would!"
Human Resources (2022)
"-Dave, hug Victor, will ya? -Gladly. Bring it in, Vic."
Human Resources (2022)
"Your turn, ladies."
Human Resources (2022)
"-Hug! Hug! Hug! -Ugh, fine."
Human Resources (2022)
"Are you happy now?"
Human Resources (2022)
"I'm ecstatic!"
Human Resources (2022)
"Now, back to the business at hand,"
Human Resources (2022)
"what are we going to do about J.K. Rowling?"
Human Resources (2022)
"Where did her magic go?"
Human Resources (2022)
"How dare that nitwit from Grief."
Human Resources (2022)
"There's still so much life left in you. You're not going anywhere."
Human Resources (2022)
"Oh, Walter, I don't know."
Human Resources (2022)
"Well, baby, you better know, because I still need you."
Human Resources (2022)
"Hey, who are you?"
Human Resources (2022)
"I'm Lindsay Lohan."
Human Resources (2022)
"Give me candy, Lindsay Lohan?"
Human Resources (2022)
"Fine. I think I have a melted Tootsie Roll in my bag."
Human Resources (2022)
"Really, shit rat? A Tootsie Roll?"
Human Resources (2022)
"All you got for your grandma is the ugly second cousin of candy?"
Human Resources (2022)
"Yeah, I'm not sure how old this is."
Human Resources (2022)
"Mm. Thank you, Lindsay. This candy is not good."
Human Resources (2022)
"You know, if you want the primo stuff, I might know a place."
Human Resources (2022)
"Okay, we're intrigued."
Human Resources (2022)
"But I'm not taking you out with you looking like an aging mobster."
Human Resources (2022)
"That's what I said, girl!"
Human Resources (2022)
"One thing I always liked about you, Teta, you have incredible taste."
Human Resources (2022)
"Yes, thank you! Finally some respect."
Human Resources (2022)
"Ooh! And an Hermès scarf? Girl, you better have one for me too."
Human Resources (2022)
"Ugh, come on. Who holds hands while they eat lunch?"
Human Resources (2022)
"Why don't you just chew each other's food while you're at it?"
Human Resources (2022)
"Emmy, over here! Yoo-hoo!"
Human Resources (2022)
"Several free seats. Please, join me."
Human Resources (2022)
"I guess this is my life now."
Human Resources (2022)
"-Yeah, welcome to the cool table. -Oh!"
Human Resources (2022)
"Can you help me get into my milk? I'm about to give up and buy a new one."
Human Resources (2022)
"Ugh, I feel bad about Emmy."
Human Resources (2022)
"I mean, I did lie to her about us, and you two were together."
Human Resources (2022)
"In the carnal sense, sure."
Human Resources (2022)
"But all we did was fuck, and the odd blowjob,"
Human Resources (2022)
"and I say odd because, you know, I have three dongers."
Human Resources (2022)
"-It's fuckin' odd down there, right? -Come on, Dante, I'm being serious."
Human Resources (2022)
"Babe, babe, so am I."
Human Resources (2022)
"But you need to stop punishing yourself because you're happy and Emmy's miserable."
Human Resources (2022)
"Okay, so, what?"
Human Resources (2022)
"You're saying she's just jealous?"
Human Resources (2022)
"If that'll end this conversation, then yeah."
Human Resources (2022)
"-Fuck you. -You deserve love, Rochelle."
Human Resources (2022)
"-I love you. -And I love you."
Human Resources (2022)
"Ladies and gentlemen,"
Human Resources (2022)
"I love this bug and I don't care who knows it."
Human Resources (2022)
"-Finger him! Finger him!"
Human Resources (2022)
"Come on, guys! Finger him! Nobody? Just me?"
Human Resources (2022)
"Oh, look at you! You've never looked more vibrant."
Human Resources (2022)
"And I look fine as hell too, if I do say so myself."
Human Resources (2022)
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