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Clips from Bad Grandpa

"G-53."
Bad Grandpa
"What happened to your dad?"
Bad Grandpa
"Hey, Dad."
Bad Grandpa
"Yeah, what happened to him?"
Bad Grandpa
"- No, you're my dad. - Hmm?"
Bad Grandpa
"High five, Dad."
Bad Grandpa
"Down low. Too slow."
Bad Grandpa
"Who are you here with?"
Bad Grandpa
"You. My new dad."
Bad Grandpa
"Well, I'm not your new dad. But..."
Bad Grandpa
"You're funny."
Bad Grandpa
"Um..."
Bad Grandpa
"Hey, Dad, look at me in the eye."
Bad Grandpa
"Like..."
Bad Grandpa
"I love you."
Bad Grandpa
"Anyway, I need to, uh..."
Bad Grandpa
"I got stuff I have to do, so, uh... Be safe."
Bad Grandpa
"Love you, Dad!"
Bad Grandpa
"Oh, here she is!"
Bad Grandpa
"Here I am. You want to buy some 22s?"
Bad Grandpa
"- What are 22s? - You wish you was 22."
Bad Grandpa
"They look like 36Ds to me."
Bad Grandpa
"No."
Bad Grandpa
"No? 36 full Cs."
Bad Grandpa
"22s, that's what they are!"
Bad Grandpa
"Can I use your pen?"
Bad Grandpa
"Yes, you may, sweetheart."
Bad Grandpa
"All right! How you doing?"
Bad Grandpa
"Okay."
Bad Grandpa
"You know, you're pretty sexy."
Bad Grandpa
"Thank you."
Bad Grandpa
"I mean really sexy."
Bad Grandpa
"I..."
Bad Grandpa
"I have to take this up there."
Bad Grandpa
"All right."
Bad Grandpa
"What's your name, sweetheart?"
Bad Grandpa
"I'm getting froze out."
Bad Grandpa
"Did you win any money at bingo?"
Bad Grandpa
"No."
Bad Grandpa
"You shouldn't drink so much."
Bad Grandpa
"Pipe down!"
Bad Grandpa
"Oh, God."
Bad Grandpa
"Do you have any idea how heavy you are?"
Bad Grandpa
"Do you have any idea how I don't give a shit?"
Bad Grandpa
"Where are we going?"
Bad Grandpa
"Just keep going straight."
Bad Grandpa
"- You getting tired? - Yeah."
Bad Grandpa
"Are you an alcoholic?"
Bad Grandpa
"No, I'm not an alcoholic."
Bad Grandpa
"I wouldn't be surprised if you are."
Bad Grandpa
"Just had a couple too many."
Bad Grandpa
"Onward! Onward!"
Bad Grandpa
"Oh, let's get something to eat."
Bad Grandpa
"Make a left."
Bad Grandpa
"Okay. Go here! No, Billy!"
Bad Grandpa
"It's heavy."
Bad Grandpa
"No, push me this way. Push me this way."
Bad Grandpa
"Lisa! Lisa, come look at this."
Bad Grandpa
"He's drunk, and he's drinking beer."
Bad Grandpa
"Oh, he got a six-pack."
Bad Grandpa
"- Push me. - Oh."
Bad Grandpa
"Hello?"
Bad Grandpa
"We'd like some food."
Bad Grandpa
"Okay, what you need?"
Bad Grandpa
"Chickens."
Bad Grandpa
"Chicken breast."
Bad Grandpa
"Any kind of breast."
Bad Grandpa
"Sir, you need some help?"
Bad Grandpa
"Yes, I need some service!"
Bad Grandpa
"Okay, well, you got to... We'll get you served,"
Bad Grandpa
"I need to push you over here. We'll bring it out to you."
Bad Grandpa
"Need to get you away from here."
Bad Grandpa
"Let me push you over to the side, okay?"
Bad Grandpa
"Can you let go of the thing there?"
Bad Grandpa
"I'll push you over to the side."
Bad Grandpa
"- Okay, but... - What do you want?"
Bad Grandpa
"Do you guys serve beers?"
Bad Grandpa
"No, we don't serve beer."
Bad Grandpa
"How about whiskey?"
Bad Grandpa
"Um, no, we don't have whiskey, either."
Bad Grandpa
"Sir, what do you have that's good in there for a hangover?"
Bad Grandpa
"To eat? I mean, greasy food is always good."
Bad Grandpa
"But a hangover? Sleep. He got to sleep it off."
Bad Grandpa
"Man, that girl working the window,"
Bad Grandpa
"she was nice-looking."
Bad Grandpa
"- She's nice-looking? - Yeah."
Bad Grandpa
"Well, you just chill out here for a minute."
Bad Grandpa
"We're gonna see if we can get you some help."
Bad Grandpa
"Okay, we need some chickens"
Bad Grandpa
"and a big side of poontang."
Bad Grandpa
"The poontang? There's some inside."
Bad Grandpa
"Well, I want some to go. Go hook that up."
Bad Grandpa
"He's stuck on Lisa."
Bad Grandpa
"That's what he want."
Bad Grandpa
"- Black bush gal? - Lisa!"
Bad Grandpa
"He said he wanted poontang."
Bad Grandpa
"He'll hook you up!"
Bad Grandpa
"What? No, he don't."
Bad Grandpa
"Excuse me, honey."
Bad Grandpa
"That's what he's hollering."
Bad Grandpa
"That's what he wants, Lisa."
Bad Grandpa
"Honest to God, strike me dead."
Bad Grandpa
"Lisa, that man is 80 years old."
Bad Grandpa
"I turned around and I said,"
Bad Grandpa
""Did he say what I thought he just said?""
Bad Grandpa
"You better go out there."
Bad Grandpa
"He is 80 years old in a shopping cart."
Bad Grandpa
"Cut the man a break."
Bad Grandpa
"Siempre avante. Know what that means?"
Bad Grandpa
"No."
Bad Grandpa
"Onward and forward."
Bad Grandpa
"You know, rubber on wheel is faster than rubber on heel."
Bad Grandpa
"That's what Lightnin' Hopkins says."
Bad Grandpa
"You know who Lightnin' Hopkins is?"
Bad Grandpa
"No."
Bad Grandpa
"What about Komodo dragons? You know what those are?"
Bad Grandpa
"No."
Bad Grandpa
"You don't know who Johnny Cash is?"
Bad Grandpa
"No."
Bad Grandpa
"Ask me what the secret of comedy is."
Bad Grandpa
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