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Clips from Girls5eva - A.I.R.P.I.G. (S01E01)

"and go be on TV in Atlanta."
Girls5eva
"I don't want to dress up to go to the mall."
Girls5eva
"- And I'm not selling "Four Stars.""
Girls5eva
"I mean, our talent got us on the radio before."
Girls5eva
"- No, it didn't. [sighs]"
Girls5eva
"- It's not a sunburn. I nodded off at Benihana."
Girls5eva
"- You're not a part of this, Larry."
Girls5eva
"- You think your talent got you on the radio"
Girls5eva
"back when my knees were gorgeous?"
Girls5eva
"You know how many people have talent?"
Girls5eva
"How come every crack head's first offer"
Girls5eva
"is I'll suck your dick?"
Girls5eva
"- Ugh! - Work up to that, people."
Girls5eva
"Maybe start with, I'll digitize your old photos."
Girls5eva
"[laughs]"
Girls5eva
"- See? Talent's a dime a dozen."
Girls5eva
"The only reason you got on the radio was because I paid."
Girls5eva
"- Paid who? - I made a sizeable donation"
Girls5eva
"to the promotional budget of Johnny and the Doink"
Girls5eva
"over at CrouchFM."
Girls5eva
"- Oh."
Girls5eva
"- The Doink did have suspiciously nice air horns."
Girls5eva
"- Okay, but our talent kept us on the radio for 21 weeks."
Girls5eva
"- Maybe I'm mad because my B-pop group sold me"
Girls5eva
"a fake cell phone and stole my rental car"
Girls5eva
"but you're clinging to a fantasy."
Girls5eva
"This biz may seem all shiny and perfect on the outside,"
Girls5eva
"but inside it's full of crab."
Girls5eva
"- Crab, what? - Crap!"
Girls5eva
"Ow! My burnt face makes it hard to say Ps. Ow."
Girls5eva
"- That's enough, Larry. Just get outta here!"
Girls5eva
"- I can't. This is where I'm supposed"
Girls5eva
"to meet the hotel nurse."
Girls5eva
"Oh, it's a guy. Forget it."
Girls5eva
"I'll just stick my face in the pool. Ow."
Girls5eva
"- Larry's right. I am clinging to a fantasy."
Girls5eva
"- The Kev stuff sinks in"
Girls5eva
"because Larry accidentally said it?"
Girls5eva
"- Well, I'm sorry, he's still an authority figure to me"
Girls5eva
"because he wears a very big watch."
Girls5eva
"- Whatever, I'll take it."
Girls5eva
"Good for you, Summer!"
Girls5eva
"- * Sometimes you just need a little push *"
Girls5eva
"* To find a home *"
Girls5eva
"Hack yeah, Rebecca."
Girls5eva
"[door closes] [clicks tongue]"
Girls5eva
"Hey, babe."
Girls5eva
"[gentle music]"
Girls5eva
"- Kev, I love you."
Girls5eva
"But this isn't a real relationship."
Girls5eva
"There are lies, and you're never home."
Girls5eva
"I deserve more."
Girls5eva
"And don't just say that you're gonna"
Girls5eva
"come home three weekends a month."
Girls5eva
"- I couldn't do that. That's too much."
Girls5eva
"This place would look like Jonestown."
Girls5eva
"- I don't want to pretend that everything is fine"
Girls5eva
"just because I love being half of Summer and Kev."
Girls5eva
"I mean, the most intimate experience"
Girls5eva
"I had this year was riding a city bike over cobblestones."
Girls5eva
"It's not normal. - Hey, nothing's going on."
Girls5eva
"At least I'm not golfing! [laughs]"
Girls5eva
"- Okay, Kev."
Girls5eva
"If you have, like, unprocessed feelings,"
Girls5eva
"let's talk about those. - No, no, no, I am all good."
Girls5eva
"I am eatin' good in the neighborhood."
Girls5eva
"That's an Applebee's reference."
Girls5eva
"- I just think it means something"
Girls5eva
"that you want to spend all your time"
Girls5eva
"saving creatures that hide."
Girls5eva
"- I don't want to talk, Summer."
Girls5eva
"I just want to watch this crab graduate from one doll head"
Girls5eva
"to a slightly larger doll head."
Girls5eva
"And I don't know or care to explore why."
Girls5eva
"- Well, then I can't keep doing this."
Girls5eva
"Maybe instead of being Summer and Kev..."
Girls5eva
"we should just be Summer."
Girls5eva
"And Kev."
Girls5eva
"- What are you talking about?"
Girls5eva
"Separate websites? I'll never give you that."
Girls5eva
"- [sighs]"
Girls5eva
"I'm talking about divorce, babe."
Girls5eva
"[upbeat music]"
Girls5eva
"* *"
Girls5eva
"- Ugh!"
Girls5eva
"- You okay? - Why am I being an idiot?"
Girls5eva
"There's a real job on the other side of that door,"
Girls5eva
"a job on TV, where I get to go,"
Girls5eva
"[fake laugh] we'll be right back."
Girls5eva
"But I can't leave them again, they're my friends."
Girls5eva
"- If I got offered, literally, any other job than this one,"
Girls5eva
"I would take it."
Girls5eva
"So many big pubes on tiny soaps."
Girls5eva
"- Nance, thank you so much."
Girls5eva
"I'm really glad it worked out."
Girls5eva
"[dramatic music]"
Girls5eva
"- That little stinker."
Girls5eva
"* *"
Girls5eva
"- I am starving. Benihana?"
Girls5eva
"- I want you to know I don't judge you because I did it too."
Girls5eva
"How are we gonna tell Summer and Gloria?"
Girls5eva
"- Tell them what? - I saw you upstairs, Dawn."
Girls5eva
"You took the deal, so then I took the deal."
Girls5eva
"- What? Wickie, I didn't take the deal."
Girls5eva
"I went back to Nance and sold "Stronger than the Best""
Girls5eva
"and "Monster Mash 2," our scraps."
Girls5eva
"- What? My flight to Atlanta leaves in 40 minutes!"
Girls5eva
"Because reality TV judges work tugboat captain hours."
Girls5eva
"- You're Wickie-ing?"
Girls5eva
"- Because I thought you were Wickie-ing!"
Girls5eva
"- I went to Nance for us, because I'm all in."
Girls5eva
"I got us money to put back into the group!"
Girls5eva
"[phone chimes]"
Girls5eva
"- Ugh, my driver's here. Shit!"
Girls5eva
"- So undo it, Wickie!"
Girls5eva
"- I don't know, Dawn."
Girls5eva
"Maybe Nance is right and this is the best it's gonna get."
Girls5eva
"I'm sorry."
Girls5eva
"Spend the money on your kid's college."
Girls5eva
"- I already spent it."
Girls5eva
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