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Clips from NewsRadio - Noise (S05E05)

You remember those physicals

"You remember those physicals"

NewsRadio

we had to take for the, uh, company insurance?

"we had to take for the, uh, company insurance?"

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No, it doesn't.

"No, it doesn't."

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Stay tuned for national news at the top of the hour.

"Stay tuned for national news at the top of the hour."

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Yes. Well, I don't wanna hear it.

"Yes. Well, I don't wanna hear it."

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[COYOTE HOWLING]

"[COYOTE HOWLING]"

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Well, who makes his lunch?

"Well, who makes his lunch?"

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Yeah, well.

"Yeah, well."

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That's part of the panache.

"That's part of the panache."

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What are you doing? Capturing the memories.

"What are you doing? Capturing the memories."

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Max, the United States Marines did not celebrate with a luau

"Max, the United States Marines did not celebrate with a luau"

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Yeah, the early 40s just fly right by.

"Yeah, the early 40s just fly right by."

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A few minutes. A few hours.

"A few minutes. A few hours."

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that would enrage me and thus,

"that would enrage me and thus,"

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That--that cricket there. That cricket?

"That--that cricket there. That cricket?"

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Hi. They're talking to each other, Dave.

"Hi. They're talking to each other, Dave."

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Oh, don't listen to him. He gets a little cranky

"Oh, don't listen to him. He gets a little cranky"

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Oh, it's a schedule of when I have to be in the booth.

"Oh, it's a schedule of when I have to be in the booth."

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Did you say something to him? Well, yeah, actually.

"Did you say something to him? Well, yeah, actually."

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What do you mean?

"What do you mean?"

NewsRadio

MARTIN LUTHER KING JR.: I have a dream today.

"MARTIN LUTHER KING JR.: I have a dream today."

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[FLUTE PLAYING]

"[FLUTE PLAYING]"

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On this date in 1777

"On this date in 1777"

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on "Max Lewis' This Day In History."

"on "Max Lewis' This Day In History.""

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Thank you, sir.

"Thank you, sir."

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What the dilly-o?

"What the dilly-o?"

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So like I was saying,

"So like I was saying,"

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Result? Immense setback.

"Result? Immense setback."

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'Cause he thinks you're sort of a bad influence.

"'Cause he thinks you're sort of a bad influence."

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just not good enough for me. Okay?

"just not good enough for me. Okay?"

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I'm gonna get the thermometer.

"I'm gonna get the thermometer."

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Okay. So you finally see that I'm right.

"Okay. So you finally see that I'm right."

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Dude, this is really uncool.

"Dude, this is really uncool."

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says your blood pressure's up 27 percent from last year.

"says your blood pressure's up 27 percent from last year."

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And then...?

"And then...?"

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[BUZZING]

"[BUZZING]"

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[♪]

"[♪]"

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However, "Max Lewis' This Day In History"

"However, "Max Lewis' This Day In History""

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In the end all we are is dust in the wind.

"In the end all we are is dust in the wind."

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Well, sir, these must be bleak times for your rag-tag band

"Well, sir, these must be bleak times for your rag-tag band"

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[♪]

"[♪]"

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Kim Lee's on Fifty-eighth.

"Kim Lee's on Fifty-eighth."

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[STRESS RELIEVER SQUEAKS, POPS]

"[STRESS RELIEVER SQUEAKS, POPS]"

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[TRAIN WHISTLE TOOTING]

"[TRAIN WHISTLE TOOTING]"

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Does it involve continuing this conversation?

"Does it involve continuing this conversation?"

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But isn't that your job?

"But isn't that your job?"

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Forget it.

"Forget it."

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you'd commit some sort of egregious blunder

"you'd commit some sort of egregious blunder"

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That's not what they told me.

"That's not what they told me."

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Shh.

"Shh."

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I didn't hear anything. What? Yeah, it's--

"I didn't hear anything. What? Yeah, it's--"

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that report I gave you?

"that report I gave you?"

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snap me out of my virtual bliss.

"snap me out of my virtual bliss."

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I still don't understand why everyone was so

"I still don't understand why everyone was so"

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That was what we call in radio lingo, "audio gold."

"That was what we call in radio lingo, "audio gold.""

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All right, Dave, I think maybe you might have gotten

"All right, Dave, I think maybe you might have gotten"

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Let's pretend Max doesn't have a mother.

"Let's pretend Max doesn't have a mother."

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We have to get him to relax. JIMMY: Yeah.

"We have to get him to relax. JIMMY: Yeah."

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What'd you think?

"What'd you think?"

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Max, you're the one that's pushing us

"Max, you're the one that's pushing us"

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[♪]

"[♪]"

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The off switch doesn't come till this weekend.

"The off switch doesn't come till this weekend."

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What do you mean boring? Didn't you hear the train whistle?

"What do you mean boring? Didn't you hear the train whistle?"

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known as Guadalcanal,

"known as Guadalcanal,"

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Don't worry about it, babe. We all have our hang-ups.

"Don't worry about it, babe. We all have our hang-ups."

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but you gotta keep on trying.

"but you gotta keep on trying."

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Um, everyone out there is getting a little worried

"Um, everyone out there is getting a little worried"

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Now scoot there. Thanks.

"Now scoot there. Thanks."

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Okay, now you're kind of ruining it.

"Okay, now you're kind of ruining it."

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That's okay. That's okay, Matthew. I expect it from you.

"That's okay. That's okay, Matthew. I expect it from you."

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Oh, okay. Great.

"Oh, okay. Great."

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What?

"What?"

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I didn't say that.

"I didn't say that."

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You know what I mean.

"You know what I mean."

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Oh. My.

"Oh. My."

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We can sneak out later and do some stuff.

"We can sneak out later and do some stuff."

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I don't think you're ready.

"I don't think you're ready."

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I-I'm sorry I have to rush through this.

"I-I'm sorry I have to rush through this."

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that, you know,

"that, you know,"

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Dave's whole body is white.

"Dave's whole body is white."

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is going to be over?

"is going to be over?"

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It's a hideous paradox really.

"It's a hideous paradox really."

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Oh, what is it? A time machine?

"Oh, what is it? A time machine?"

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Hey.

"Hey."

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'cause this one ain't interested.

"'cause this one ain't interested."

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[♪]

"[♪]"

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Well, find another jackass,

"Well, find another jackass,"

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[COINS JINGLING]

"[COINS JINGLING]"

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[GUNFIRE]

"[GUNFIRE]"

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Back in two minutes.

"Back in two minutes."

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[HAWAIIAN MUSIC PLAYING]

"[HAWAIIAN MUSIC PLAYING]"

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These disposable cameras are great.

"These disposable cameras are great."

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LISA: You know, and then he puts in

"LISA: You know, and then he puts in"

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Oh, it doesn't really matter.

"Oh, it doesn't really matter."

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Pardon?

"Pardon?"

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Dave?

"Dave?"

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Doesn't mean we don't love you.

"Doesn't mean we don't love you."

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It's my favorite part here. Listen.

"It's my favorite part here. Listen."

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Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

"Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah."

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Maybe it's just that Beth wants

"Maybe it's just that Beth wants"

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ANNOUNCER: And now your host, Lisa Miller.

"ANNOUNCER: And now your host, Lisa Miller."

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You heard it first, you heard it live

"You heard it first, you heard it live"

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What do you mean by experienced?

"What do you mean by experienced?"

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Well, um, it's 'cause the insurance doctor

"Well, um, it's 'cause the insurance doctor"

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Okay, everyone, look,

"Okay, everyone, look,"

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eager to have me relaxed.

"eager to have me relaxed."

NewsRadio