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Clips from South Park - Proper Condom Use (S05E05)

"Right. Like, in the"
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"nipples."
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"It says here that"
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"the head of the penis is actually the most sensitive part."
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"Yes. The nerve endings are the most concentrated at the tip of the penis,"
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"And these are the two areas most important to..."
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"Sexual stimulation."
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"- Is this wrong? - I don't know. It doesn't feel wrong."
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"I've been thinking about you a lot, Ms. Choksondik."
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"Yeah? What do you do when you think about me?"
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"Go crazy."
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"- Do you touch yourself? - Yeah."
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"- What's wrong? - It's your turn."
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"Oh, Ms. Choksondik."
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"M'kay!"
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"- Do you want me? - I do."
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"- Tell me. - I want you."
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"Wait!"
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"- Do you have a condom? - Well, no."
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"Oh, well.... it."
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"- Oh, God, give it to me! - Oh, yeah."
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"- That's it, baby, that's it. - It feels so good."
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"What the hell was that?"
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"Did you feel something?"
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"Oh, no."
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"Butters, you're in big trouble now."
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"Well, I don't know what got into you kids."
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"We just didn't want the girls giving us diseases."
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"I'm afraid this is all my fault."
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"I forgot to tell them that to get diseases from boys,"
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"you have to have sex with them first."
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"Well, I hate to say it, but you all got what you deserve."
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"Look, schools are teaching condom use"
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"But sex isn't something that should be taught in textbooks and diagrams."
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"Sex is emotional and spiritual. It needs to be taught by family."
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"I know it can be hard, parents,"
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"you don't know who they're learning it from."
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"It could be someone who doesn't know,"
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"someone who has a bad opinion of it, or even a complete pervert."
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"What? Why did you pan to me just now?"
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"What the hell is that supposed to mean?"
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"This whole mess started because we couldn't talk to our boy ourselves."
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"It's easier to just leave it up to the school,"
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"but it's just not a school subject."
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"Then it's decided."
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"No more condom classes in grade school."
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"But, Chef, when is the right age for us to start having sex?"
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"It's very simple, children."
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"The right time to start having sex is 17."
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"- Seventeen? - Seventeen."
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"So, you mean 17, as long as you're in love?"
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"Seventeen, you're ready."
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"Well, I guess we've got a while to wait"
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"before we have to worry about sex and diseases, huh, Wendy?"
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"Come here, boy! That's it, red rocket, red rocket!"
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"Come on, now. Red rocket, dog, red rocket now."
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"Okay, children, so what other sexual positions did we talk about?"
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"Yeah, the Wrap-around Butt Grab, sure. Can't forget that."
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"Reverse Cowgirl. Good, Kevin. Hot Lunch, yeah, she likes that."
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"Donkey Punch."
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"Glass-bottom boat. Good one, yes."
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"Chilli dog."
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"He gets very good grades."
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"- Condoms? - Yeah. Quick!"
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"Well, if you must know, I'm still somewhat of a virgin."
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"All right, here, everyone. Tweek, give everyone a rubber band."
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"Yeah, I think I can get through that stuff pretty quick."
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"like they are in the clitoris of the woman."
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"to younger and younger students each day."
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"Fish-eye. Good, Jenny."
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"There, you see?"
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"Yeah! Chef, what's "laid"?"
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"Mom sure is in a lot of pain."
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