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Clips from 30 Rock - Blind Date (S01E01)

"Poker night? Who plays?"
30 Rock
"Really, that's all you got out of that?"
30 Rock
"I'd be interested in seeing my new employees"
30 Rock
"under that kind of pressure."
30 Rock
"You're not gonna come to our crappy poker game, are you?"
30 Rock
"3 can't go here. 3 can't go here."
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"Can't go here."
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"It can go here."
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"And you know what?"
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"I have three pieces of advice for any of you playing tonight."
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"You're gonna need great timing, and finally..."
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"Fine, I'll meet your friend."
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"So, who is this Thomas guy?"
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"Oh, I don't know. He's one of Jack's friends."
30 Rock
"Oh, my God, isn't Jack friends with Tom DeLay?"
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"Am I going on a date with Tom DeLay?"
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"Oh, why did I say I would do this?"
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"I haven't been on a date since Dennis and I broke up,"
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"and that was almost a year ago."
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"It's just one date."
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"But if it is Tom DeLay and you do go home with him,"
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"be prepared for it to get weird."
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"I know this guy that runs an underground bird fight."
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"Oh, yeah."
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"Guys, we just need to try the green-screen stuff"
30 Rock
"one more time."
30 Rock
"I used to play all kinds of poker with my aunts..."
30 Rock
"Crazy 7, Albuquerque Freak-Out, One-Card Stud."
30 Rock
"Yeah, I don't think those are real games."
30 Rock
"Whatever. Get ready to get took."
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"No, Mom, I can't make it Friday. I got to work."
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"Hey, Frank? Hold on."
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"Yeah? What do guys like?"
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"Uh, porn."
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"No, I mean, if you were gonna go on a date with a woman,"
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"how would you want her to act?"
30 Rock
"you're on for 8:00 for dinner at Caf� des Artistes."
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"Really? Wow."
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"What? What are you gonna wear?"
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"No, that won't do."
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"and find something..."
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"in a women's clothing store."
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"Remind me what's better,"
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"a pair of black aces or a pair of red aces."
30 Rock
"You guys, I'm leaving."
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"Whoo-hoo!"
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"All right, all right."
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"Hey, look at you!"
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"You look like a fancy prostitute."
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"Okay, I got my chair."
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"I got my beer. I got my lucky doughnut."
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"Oh, is there room for one more?"
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"Yeah, sure. Really? That's fantastic."
30 Rock
"Could we just, uh, this."
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"Donaghy, what up?"
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"Face cards are wild, 3 is a jinx, 5s are 2s."
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"Oh, Jack, we usually just play for quarters."
30 Rock
"This is a man's game."
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"Okay."
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"I call."
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"And I'll see that with this thing."
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"Three cowboys."
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"Oh, my God, my wedding ring."
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"Oh, my God."
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"Now, you should all learn from Pete's mistake."
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"My wife's gonna kill me!"
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"You see, in poker, as in business, the key to success"
30 Rock
"and, more importantly, his weaknesses."
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"a weakness of character that manifests itself physically."
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"Like, when Lutz here has a good hand, he stops eating."
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"to hide his nervousness."
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"Oh, really, is that what you think?"
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"Yeah, I'm out."
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"Okay, Rain Man, tell me what I got."
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"Hi, Pinot Grigio, please."
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"Donaghy took me for $200."
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"Yeah, well, I bet my rent money,"
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"Oh, I'll play with you, Mr. Donaghy."
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"Kenneth, how long you been sitting there?"
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"I'm taking Pete's place, 'cause he's busy in the bathroom,"
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"laying in his own sick."
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"Oh, my God."
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"He can't read Kenneth. He's a blank slate."
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"Looks like I'm the big winner."
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"Hi, I'm Gretchen Thomas, Jack's friend."
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"Great to meet you. Hi."
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"Why would Jack just assume that we're lesbians?"
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"I am a lesbian."
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"Mmm, that's awesome."
30 Rock
"somebody's made that assumption about you?"
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"Lemon, don't let these girls give you a hard time"
30 Rock
"about who you are."
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"You know, you need to brush your teeth more, young man."
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"Oh, my, what an adorable little lesbian."
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"What? I don't know."
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"Who remembers that kind of thing?"
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"Of course, yeah."
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"I completely understand if you just want to go home."
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"Jack is ridiculous."
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"Oh, I worked with Jack in plastics."
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"He tends to approach everything the same way..."
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"locate the problem, isolate the problem,"
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"That's a pretty good joke for somebody from plastics."
30 Rock
"I used to work in water-process technologies,"
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"working mainly in primary metals."
30 Rock
"Oh, so you have a comedy background?"
30 Rock
"How was your evening with Thomas?"
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"You mean Gretchen Thomas,"
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"What made you think I was gay?"
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"Your shoes."
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"Well, I'm straight."
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"Regardless, I am straight... 100% completely straight."
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"No, I'm not offended. Good."
30 Rock
"What do you know about Kenneth, the page?"
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"I don't know. He's a sweet kid."
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"Did you know that his middle name is Ellen?"
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"No, that's weird."
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"shows a rare combination"
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"of extroverted, intuitive, and aggressive?"
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"Really? It's the same as mine."
30 Rock
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