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Clips from Anger Management

Short Films 2003 3 min 1,517 clips
Short Comedy Action

Credits

- Thanks. - Fun party, huh?
"- Thanks. - Fun party, huh?"
Anger Management
Whatever.
"Whatever."
Anger Management
- Maybe I'll take dare. - Okay.
"- Maybe I'll take dare. - Okay."
Anger Management
Got any mustard for that cocktail frank, butt-lick?
"Got any mustard for that cocktail frank, butt-lick?"
Anger Management
- I hope you wrote my speech. - I did, sir. I pulled an all nighter.
"- I hope you wrote my speech. - I did, sir. I pulled an all nighter."
Anger Management
Terrific.
"Terrific."
Anger Management
I know. I'll figure something out.
"I know. I'll figure something out."
Anger Management
I'm sorry.
"I'm sorry."
Anger Management
Come on, pal. I'm already settled in here. Can't you sit somewhere else?
"Come on, pal. I'm already settled in here. Can't you sit somewhere else?"
Anger Management
Excuse me. This seat's available.
"Excuse me. This seat's available."
Anger Management
You're on my side of the armrest.
"You're on my side of the armrest."
Anger Management
I just haven't been sleeping a lot lately so I was trying to catch some....
"I just haven't been sleeping a lot lately so I was trying to catch some...."
Anger Management
She's busy right now, but it's coming.
"She's busy right now, but it's coming."
Anger Management
Just calm down.
"Just calm down."
Anger Management
I am calm. I just want my headset.
"I am calm. I just want my headset."
Anger Management
- The stewardess just keeps... - Flight attendant.
"- The stewardess just keeps... - Flight attendant."
Anger Management
I am calm. What is it with you people?
"I am calm. What is it with you people?"
Anger Management
I'm only going to say this one more time, sir. Calm down.
"I'm only going to say this one more time, sir. Calm down."
Anger Management
I'm ordering you to pay a fine of $3500.
"I'm ordering you to pay a fine of $3500."
Anger Management
In addition, to prevent further acts of rage...
"In addition, to prevent further acts of rage..."
Anger Management
Anger? Isn't this Sexaholics Anonymous?
"Anger? Isn't this Sexaholics Anonymous?"
Anger Management
You don't remember me, do you?
"You don't remember me, do you?"
Anger Management
- Good to see you again. - Good to see you too.
"- Good to see you again. - Good to see you too."
Anger Management
They actually sentenced me to anger management for that.
"They actually sentenced me to anger management for that."
Anger Management
This is incredible. You could sign this for me...
"This is incredible. You could sign this for me..."
Anger Management
I can't just sign your papers.
"I can't just sign your papers."
Anger Management
I didn't do anything wrong. You know that.
"I didn't do anything wrong. You know that."
Anger Management
...so I can at least say I gave you a proper analysis.
"...so I can at least say I gave you a proper analysis."
Anger Management
So my boss, he was talking to me about how many sick days I've taken.
"So my boss, he was talking to me about how many sick days I've taken."
Anger Management
I blacked out.
"I blacked out."
Anger Management
And when I woke up, I was standing over him and I was screaming:
"And when I woke up, I was standing over him and I was screaming:"
Anger Management
Hi.
"Hi."
Anger Management
...and he's feeling much better.
"...and he's feeling much better."
Anger Management
More good news, you won't have to listen to those lame jokes...
"More good news, you won't have to listen to those lame jokes..."
Anger Management
...because I'm only here for one session.
"...because I'm only here for one session."
Anger Management
- Nice. - I bet you beat her good.
"- Nice. - I bet you beat her good."
Anger Management
You can't admit it because you're a piece of garbage.
"You can't admit it because you're a piece of garbage."
Anger Management
I don't know about all that, but now I understand why you're here.
"I don't know about all that, but now I understand why you're here."
Anger Management
And I took a dump on his porch.
"And I took a dump on his porch."
Anger Management
- Maybe Dave's not ready yet, Chuck. - You're not ready. Hear what he said?
"- Maybe Dave's not ready yet, Chuck. - You're not ready. Hear what he said?"
Anger Management
I'm sure he'd love to listen to what you guys have to say.
"I'm sure he'd love to listen to what you guys have to say."
Anger Management
- ...which was cool, it was in the script. - Sure.
"- ...which was cool, it was in the script. - Sure."
Anger Management
Goosfraba.
"Goosfraba."
Anger Management
Not blah blah, Nate.
"Not blah blah, Nate."
Anger Management
How do you feel?
"How do you feel?"
Anger Management
Better.
"Better."
Anger Management
...that mothers used to calm their children.
"...that mothers used to calm their children."
Anger Management
Who are you?
"Who are you?"
Anger Management
...at a major pet products company.
"...at a major pet products company."
Anger Management
I like playing tennis on occasion....
"I like playing tennis on occasion...."
Anger Management
Also, not your hobbies, Dave, just simple:
"Also, not your hobbies, Dave, just simple:"
Anger Management
No, I just....
"No, I just...."
Anger Management
Dave, you're describing your personality.
"Dave, you're describing your personality."
Anger Management
I'm just not doing it right, I guess.
"I'm just not doing it right, I guess."
Anger Management
What are you laughing at, Dave?
"What are you laughing at, Dave?"
Anger Management
Then we'll see who's laughing.
"Then we'll see who's laughing."
Anger Management
What? Think you're better than me because you've got both your nuts?
"What? Think you're better than me because you've got both your nuts?"
Anger Management
All right, man. All right. Come on. Come on, big boy. Pretty boy.
"All right, man. All right. Come on. Come on, big boy. Pretty boy."
Anger Management
- So he's laughing at you. - I'm not laughing at him.
"- So he's laughing at you. - I'm not laughing at him."
Anger Management
Goosfraba.
"Goosfraba."
Anger Management
- Goosfraba. - Okay.
"- Goosfraba. - Okay."
Anger Management
Where's the coffee cake? I was looking forward to it.
"Where's the coffee cake? I was looking forward to it."
Anger Management
I think I'm going to recommend to the court that we double your time.
"I think I'm going to recommend to the court that we double your time."
Anger Management
Implosive is the cashier who remains quiet, day after day...
"Implosive is the cashier who remains quiet, day after day..."
Anger Management
You're the cashier.
"You're the cashier."
Anger Management
...to help calm you down when you're losing it.
"...to help calm you down when you're losing it."
Anger Management
Heard we're partnering up, huh?
"Heard we're partnering up, huh?"
Anger Management
- Yes. - Here's my number.
"- Yes. - Here's my number."
Anger Management
Oops, that's a letter I'm writing to Geraldo Rivera.
"Oops, that's a letter I'm writing to Geraldo Rivera."
Anger Management
- I see. - My bad. Here.
"- I see. - My bad. Here."
Anger Management
That's the number. Good. Thank you.
"That's the number. Good. Thank you."
Anger Management
Dave thinks they could beat Seattle's win record.
"Dave thinks they could beat Seattle's win record."
Anger Management
Remember at Brown when we saw Ron Guidry win his 20th?
"Remember at Brown when we saw Ron Guidry win his 20th?"
Anger Management
We could've been too.
"We could've been too."
Anger Management
Thanks for being my best friend.
"Thanks for being my best friend."
Anger Management
Linda.
"Linda."
Anger Management
How was the doctor?
"How was the doctor?"
Anger Management
Psychotic.
"Psychotic."
Anger Management
I wasn't able to talk to him about that yet, but I will.
"I wasn't able to talk to him about that yet, but I will."
Anger Management
Not that crowded here. You'd think it would be packed.
"Not that crowded here. You'd think it would be packed."
Anger Management
Hey, Dave.
"Hey, Dave."
Anger Management
Okay, they got fishing while you go to the bathroom. That's nice.
"Okay, they got fishing while you go to the bathroom. That's nice."
Anger Management
Yankees winning, beer and hot dogs.
"Yankees winning, beer and hot dogs."
Anger Management
What are you talking about?
"What are you talking about?"
Anger Management
It's actually quite petite.
"It's actually quite petite."
Anger Management
When you're in a locker room, you must feel good about yourself.
"When you're in a locker room, you must feel good about yourself."
Anger Management
- Which isn't bad. - You're doing really good.
"- Which isn't bad. - You're doing really good."
Anger Management
After I got kicked out of the Army, I went through a real bad time:
"After I got kicked out of the Army, I went through a real bad time:"
Anger Management
But, yes.
"But, yes."
Anger Management
Would give you the old licky-licky, then fry your banana.
"Would give you the old licky-licky, then fry your banana."
Anger Management
Wake up to the sound of kids screaming.
"Wake up to the sound of kids screaming."
Anger Management
Explosions everywhere.
"Explosions everywhere."
Anger Management
- Grenada, man. - Grenada?
"- Grenada, man. - Grenada?"
Anger Management
And I'm pretty sure I heard him mutter some kind of anti-Semitic remark.
"And I'm pretty sure I heard him mutter some kind of anti-Semitic remark."
Anger Management
Let's go give those guys some tsuris.
"Let's go give those guys some tsuris."
Anger Management
Well, the guy on the left is blind, Chuck.
"Well, the guy on the left is blind, Chuck."
Anger Management
He's yours.
"He's yours."
Anger Management
Stop! Goosfraba!
"Stop! Goosfraba!"
Anger Management
Trying to take away my cane, Your Honor.
"Trying to take away my cane, Your Honor."
Anger Management
Your Honor, we're not even sure how blind this man really is.
"Your Honor, we're not even sure how blind this man really is."
Anger Management
Okay. My bad. Moving on.
"Okay. My bad. Moving on."
Anger Management
Is this good or bad?
"Is this good or bad?"
Anger Management
Well, it's bad that he's talking to her...
"Well, it's bad that he's talking to her..."
Anger Management
- You think you can help him? - I think so, Your Honor.
"- You think you can help him? - I think so, Your Honor."
Anger Management
...because of the enormous respect I have for Dr. Rydell...
"...because of the enormous respect I have for Dr. Rydell..."
Anger Management
The lair of the rage rhino.
"The lair of the rage rhino."
Anger Management
Let's be perfectly clear about this.
"Let's be perfectly clear about this."
Anger Management
- Anything else, Dr. B? - No thanks, Dan.
"- Anything else, Dr. B? - No thanks, Dan."
Anger Management
I don't want you listening to any angry music.
"I don't want you listening to any angry music."
Anger Management
Don't be naive, Dave.
"Don't be naive, Dave."
Anger Management
Close to You. We've Only Just Begun.
"Close to You. We've Only Just Begun."
Anger Management
Who's going to pay for that?
"Who's going to pay for that?"
Anger Management
Retard your anger level a few notches and listen to me. Can you do that?
"Retard your anger level a few notches and listen to me. Can you do that?"
Anger Management
Now then, we need to go over some ground rules.
"Now then, we need to go over some ground rules."
Anger Management
You're to refrain from violent acts including verbal assault...
"You're to refrain from violent acts including verbal assault..."
Anger Management
You may not use rage-enhancing substances...
"You may not use rage-enhancing substances..."
Anger Management
That having been said, I'm a pretty good guy...
"That having been said, I'm a pretty good guy..."
Anger Management
...because I only have one bed and no couch.
"...because I only have one bed and no couch."
Anger Management
Yeah, well, that's why I'm proud to be an American.
"Yeah, well, that's why I'm proud to be an American."
Anger Management
I like to sleep in the nude.
"I like to sleep in the nude."
Anger Management