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Clips from Brooklyn Nine-Nine - Kicks (S05E05)

"'cause there's gonna be a doinkload of sodium"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"at Freedom Feast 2017."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"We begin where all great stories begin."
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"After that, we're gonna move our adventure over"
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"to Cheeseburger Mountain,"
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"which consists... you guessed it... of turkey burgers."
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"Kindly raise your two liters."
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"To freedom, to you, and most importantly,"
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"to orange drank."
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"And sex with Amy."
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"ALL: To sex with Amy!"
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"- (KNOCKING) - Oink, oink."
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"Good morning, sir."
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"You want something."
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"A video game, perhaps?"
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"Or a fidget spinner?"
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"I do want both of those things,"
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"but that's not why I'm here."
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"I'm back and I'm ready for a case, so what do you got?"
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"A murder? A sui? A murder-sui?"
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"Ooh, maybe you've got an avunculicide up in there?"
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"The murder of an uncle."
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"I'm surprised you know what that word means."
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"I learned about a lot of new crimes in prison."
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"Those people real bad."
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"You've been assigned to desk duty."
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"Oh, please. Don't make me sit behind a desk all day."
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"That's worse than prison."
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"No, it's not. Prison real bad."
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"Those are the rules for anyone experiencing"
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"a traumatic work-lapse."
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"It wasn't that traumatic."
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"You just said, and I quote,"
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""Prison real bad.""
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"Look, I'm ready. I'm the same old Jake."
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"I don't know why you have an issue with this."
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"Rosa was happy to comply."
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"So, what, now I'm just supposed"
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"to do anything that Rosa does?"
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"I mean, what if she jumped off a cliff?"
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"If Rosa were to jump off a cliff,"
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"she would've done her due diligence regarding"
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"the height of the cliff, the depth of the water,"
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"and the angle of entry, so... yes."
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"If you see Rosa jump off a cliff, by all means."
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"Jump off a cliff."
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"You jump off a cliff."
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"Gladly."
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"Provided Rosa did first."
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"Hey. Babe."
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"You forgot your lunch at home."
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"Aww, thanks Adrian. You're the sweetest."
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"Aww, of course."
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"Pimento, welcome back."
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"How was Argentina?"
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"Eh, it was kind of boring, actually."
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"- (LAUGHTER) - Still feels like you and I"
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"have a different idea about what a funny thing is."
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"What? Say good-bye to mommy."
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"Ooh, don't mind if I do."
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"All right, I'm just gonna look over here."
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"- Okay. I'm doing that thing. - Man."
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"- I think it's still happening. - I'm still hearing it."
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"Phew!"
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"Hang on. Were you creeps watching that the whole time?"
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"- Well... - Uh..."
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"I'm just kidding. I know you were."
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"with both eyes wide open. Full on. You're welcome."
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"- Love you too. - Yeah!"
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"I mean, you shouldn't eat that sandwich."
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"Something's wrong. He's acting weird..."
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"- Er than normal? - Yes."
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"He's not telling me something."
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"You guys did spend several months apart."
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"Maybe it's all in your head."
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"is that what you're saying, Terry?"
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"What? No, no."
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"I did not say that. I would never say that."
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"Not cool, Terry."
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"My relationship's in trouble."
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"Terry loves women!"
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"(STAMMERS) Women be sane!"
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"This is just temporary."
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"That's what I said."
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"Join us, Jake."
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"You know you want to."
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"BOTH: We're going to Wingsluts."
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"My God. Charles!"
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"Charles, Charles, Charles!"
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"What's wrong?"
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"Going crazy over here, man."
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"The only worthwhile thing I've done today"
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"was take a Buzzfeed quiz about what kind of onion I am."
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"Ah. Cipollini."
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"That was not the point of my story."
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"Abraham Lincoln abolished slavery."
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"Yeah, but think about how much faster he would've done it"
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"if he'd got off his ass once in a while, right?"
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"Well, just tell me what you're working on, huh?"
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"Before the stapling starts again, please? Please?"
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"I need this, man. Just give me a little taste."
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"- Grand larceny. - No!"
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"I just... I love grand larceny."
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"I know. I didn't wanna bring it up."
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"It'll never happen again, just..."
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"- Sneaker store. - I hope you die!"
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"This is crazy, right? It doesn't seem fair."
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"I should be working this case."
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"I will work this case."
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"and I'm gonna figure it out."
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"- Are you serious? - Yes."
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"(HIGH-PITCHED) Yeah!"
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"- Really immature. - Yeah, you're right."
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"Well, figured out what's off with Pimento."
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"I found his credit card statement."
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"There's a charge for a restaurant called La Palapa."
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"Two entrees. One flan."
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"- One flan? - One flan."
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"- That's cold. - Yeah."
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"Cold."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
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